[freeqeegrl]

I'm so done. I hate this damn body. I hate being so depressed and constantly disappointed in myself. I want to be better. I hate being "this" but I'm only going backwards. I never can stick to anything. I feel stuck in a hole ill never get out of. Its killing me. Driving me insane. I'm about to just give up. Its too overwhelming. I don't see myself ever accomplishing this ....and I feel stupid for getting my hopes up time and time again. I'm tired of being ugly. . . . Tired.

[proverbial]

freeqeegrl, I am SO with you.
In fact, I am so with you that I just joined this site specifically to leave you this comment. I ended up here via google search, having never heard of the site before. I just can't even tell you how much I understand every word you're saying, and how often I feel the exact same way, especially about feeling stupid for getting your hopes up. I have almost SIXTY pounds to lose, and that in itself defeats me, just the fact that I even GOT to this point makes me disgusted with myself. I've been dieting for over a year now, each time meeting with some success and then suddenly losing my momentum and gaining it all back. I'd more or less given up on myself until recently, and only now am I even BEGINNING to believe that it MIGHT be possible after all (I've started to focus more on exercise than diet, which has renewed my faith just enough to continue, for now.) Don't lose hope. You are absolutely not alone. And, if it makes any difference, reading your post actually made ME feel less alone, thus you've helped me out, even though I'm sorry it came at the expense of your own misery We are here to support each other. I would love to know more about what strategies have been failing you, and trade tips, encouragements, etc. If just doing a little emotional venting would help you out, I will be more than willing to listen. A lot of the progress for people like you and me depends on emotional support. I know I'm just some random girl, haha, but your post was just too familiar to me. Good luck, lady. We can do it!

[bargoo]

I am one inch taller than you and started out about ten pounds heavier and I was able to do it. So can you ! You are not ugly ! Pick a diet and exercise plan that can follow and get started.....you can do it !

[FreeSpirit]

Where is giving up going to get you? You're still going to be unhappy with your body even if you give up, and where will you be in a year if you give up? Bigger?

Nothing comes without hard work and dedication. It's hard, no doubt, but you have to be committed for it to work and if you're not committed and willing to do what it takes you're never going to make it.

What plan have you been following? What is it that you want to acheive? What are your mini goals?

[shortandfluffy]

Well first off, from your profile pic you are FAR from ugly.. so don't even say that! You are a very pretty person.

But admitting you are tired of the way things are going and want to do better is a great start. I have tried several "diets" but the thing that has been working for me is calorie counting. I have found you can still live your life and work around things that come up and still be successful.

And someone joined the site because of you.. that is pretty cool too

proverbial - your post actually made me tear up.. glad to have you here!

[tomato sunshine]

wow... i think you are really pretty! it is easy to get discouraged when dieting/exercising. but lately i have been all about it. i think it's my change in attitude. i just try to do things that make me feel good.

don't focus so much on looking "hot" asap... i find when i do this, i get discouraged very easily. maybe focus more on becoming healthier. (hardcore dieting takes serious motivation...which i don't have most of the time).

when it's nice out, plan to take a walk and get some fresh air (...eventually, one thing will lead to another.) when you have time on the weekend, plan to try a recipe you've been eager to try.

it's really hard for me to resist binging on comfort food, so i can understand if that is part the problem you're facing. but any improvements should be celebrated...binge less and on healthier things.

the journey shouldn't be torture... i know that my will is pretty weak, so i have to constantly make small steps and applaud myself for them.

i think you are already really pretty. just do what you can now without overwhelming yourself. when you are ready, you can make bigger changes. but try and stay positive any good changes you make now will be better than how you were previously. no need to feel disappointed.

[mateosmama2005]

You aren't alone...this is how i've been feeling for a month now...so I havent been loosing weight....just been depressed and what not...

[starmac13]

free - you are absolutely gorgeous. pictures dont lie.

But girl, if this was easy, we'd all be a size 2. This site is filled with like-minded individuals all trying to accomplish the same goal. It doesnt matter if you want to fit into a size 6 or say "take that" to an ex, it boils down to feeling better about yourself.

Maybe you do need to envision yourself accomplishing your goal. Or maybe focus not so much on the exterior, but the interior. The outside will definitely catch up. You just need a plan of action. Not a "I want to look better" plan but along the lines of "I want to exercise 30 minutes at the gym 3 days a week" and "I will incorporate 2 fruits and 3 veggies a day."

You can totally do this. If it helps, you are renewing my faith that it is possible. I just spoke your words to myself 5 minutes ago and quickly snapped out of it. Its a process and a journey. Its so much sweet that way. You can do it

[briters89]

I understand! Oh boy, I so do! I weigh just a couple pounds more than you, and am slightly taller than you. We are stuck in the same place. Just know that there are people out there that are in the same place as you. But, we at least realize we have a problem, and are not living in denial. You can go ahead and add me on AIM if you want. my s/n is briters89. or e-mail me any time at brittanycarlisle @gmail.com. It's so hard living in a place that does not recognize weight loss, and healthy living.

[Feral]

I frequent a few blogs and here is part of one I read the other day... I thought about this when I read your post.

My body? My body has never failed me. I have abused it for sure. I’ve dabbled in all kinds of things; eating like a crazy person, barfing it up later, doing the Diet Coke and Parliament Lights diet, stringing it out on lots of late nights and very little sleep, drinking like a fish, smoking a little dope, and even loving people who didn’t appreciate it (including me). As I’ve grown and matured and learned how to take care of myself, my body has never held a grudge. It’s always welcomed my efforts to take care of it. Responded by becoming stronger and fitter, and when I inevitably fall off the wagon it doesn’t stay mad long. It is always eager to get back at it when my brain makes up it’s mind to do so.

http://www.didijusteatthatoutloud.blogspot.com

Instead of thinking about how much you hate your body or how tired you are... or how frustrated you are... think about the things your body HAS done for you even when you treated it horribly.

[freeqeegrl]

IM still here. i just didnt want to come back and destroy all the positive things you guys were telling me by putting up a wall and being negative. I took some time to myself and feel a little better. when i posted this i was laying there on the floor in my bedroom crying . sad. i know. but today is a new day im out of my funk, kinda. Im going to start changing my ways TODAY.

Proverbial- thank god ! im not alone. seriously? im so happy youve joined ,that makes me smile! I have a little more to lose than you but were basically in the same boat... its like you take the words right out of my mouth i cant believe i let myself get this bad. its not really strategies that have failed me its more me failing to stick to a strategy. If/ when I actually eat well and exercise i lose! the problem lies in my discipline. I start and stop then start then stop. then never start till I realize i get winded walking up stairs and then it just repeats. I think your right I dont really have anyone maybe the emotional support is what i need right now. I need to talk to people who know what its like.........Thank you for being here, when i really needed someone to tell me i was not alone.

Bargoo- Thank you seeing your success gives me hope. How long did it take you to reach that goal?

FreeSpirit- Love your name! your right i just need to hear that i guess. you gave me a good swift kick in the *** when i needed it. I havent had a plan that the problem. I want to just be healthy and happy, my mini goal is to reach 170 thats it for now. thank you for the tough love.

Shortandfluffy- Hey im short and fluffy too! Thank you for the compliment. sometimes its hard to believe it though. calorie counting??? how do you know how many calories are in things?

Tomato sunshine- thank you.... im telling you sometimes a girl needs to hear that from other girls ya know? oooooo i wanna be where you are with dieting and exercise. thats exactly what i focus on i wanna be cute NOW! and it seems so faaaarrrrrrr away. great suggestions. i even looked up a new recipe to try

Mateosmama2005- btw ive always planned on naming my future son mateo a month???? i felt like this for a week and it was killing me. a month how are you doing now? i had to kick my *** and get out of the funk. i hope you read everything all the ladies wrote to me , because it helped me and i think it will help you....... feel free to message me or post to me if you need to vent . i know exactly what your going through.

Starmac13- Thank you. pictures do lie lol you cant see my body in the photo lol. j/k I know i know its gonna be hard im just such a lazy ***.... lol "take that" to an ex sounds good right about now. ill try to create specific goals like those and see where they take me. Thank you for the support!

Briters89- I love that im finding people who are pretty much where i am weight wise i dont know why but i feel better knowing others are on this journey as well. thank you i will take you up on the chatting i need some support right now...... thank you.

Feral- I love the idea of that post. ive never smoked or had a eating disorder but i have abused my body with weapons of jack in the box and midnight dinners. . . its so true about are bodies always bouncing back. ill try not to take it for granite so often.