[sh3l5]

just think of the long walks you could ennjoy....
the cycling around new towns....
i wish my bf was more interested in outdoor activities....

[i am still trying]

this thread is so true for me. My doctor once told me that the average woman gains 10-15 pounds in her first year of marriage. Also, during the beginning or a relationship too. YIKES! I weighed in at 13 pounds higher a year after marriage and that really kicked my butt into gear!

When DH and I were dating we were long distance too so every night together was a treat. We would always go out, always drink lots of wine, you get the picture.

Now, after 2 months of my journey I have lost10 pounds! I guess a lot of that was just plain bloatiness!! yuck! I still eat with him most of the time but just less. And since I do most of the groceries and cooking, well, I get to choose what we have. So I regularly make chicken breasts, yams, a lilttle rice for him, and a salad for dinner. And guess what, he enjoys it (well at least thats what i think )
Think about good you will feel when you re-start your healthy life style. You will feel sooo good and energetic.

[Dazzling]

Your story happens to lots of girls, once they are in love with someone and see that he indulges on food, they start doing the same without recognizing it. What you should do is everytime you go out to eat, order a salad and grilled chicken, order something healthy, you can also have a bite of his food just to make him happy
For me, when I am in a relationship, I lose weight because I watch what I eat more than when I am by myself... I guess I have to find me a new boyfriend again if I want to lose weight quickly lol.
Good luck

[chitownchica14]

Originally Posted by sh3l5

if love makes u fat....
does unhappiness make u thin?....

This is a really legitimate question.

I'm not sure what your relationship is with this guy (ie, whether it is truly positive or a negative influence.) And I know that nobody can make you feel good about yourself except you. However, at least in my experience, sometimes people CAN make you feel bad.

Last year, I dated a guy who I was completely infatuated with. In my mind, he could do no wrong, and there was nothing I wanted in the world other than for him to love me and want to be with me. So you'd think that dating him would make me feel good, right? Well, over the months that I was with him, my binge-eating was out of control. I'd see him and (just like you said) I'd want to eat. I couldn't understand how I could seemingly feel so happy and yet so awful at the same time.

It was only after we broke up (he turned out not to be such a great guy after all) that I finally realized how many things had been going wrong in our relationship, and how often I had ended up using food to cope with my insecurities about him. In hindsight, he didn't really treat me all that well (even though at the time it didn't seem that way.)

My point is this: it can be easy to get a little 'blinded by cupid' when you're falling for someone. But if he loves you and you love him back, and if you two truly have a positive and fulfilling relationship, then being around him shouldn't fuel hurtful behavior on your part. I don't want to suggest that there's anything wrong with your relationship, but do consider why you might feel compelled to eat or sabotage yourself when around him (it's probably more than just because he suggests you go get chinese.)

Also, remember that you can always say no or explain that you are trying not to eat junk food if he suggests it. And if he claims that you are fine the way you are, you could say something like "I'm happy that you love me as I am, but I really want to make this lifestyle change for my own health and happiness." If he is respectful of you, he will respect that, not try to sabotage it. And if you find that you can't communicate that to him, you might want to think about why it is you are afraid to do so.

Other than that...good luck and i'm glad you are in love

[peachcake]

I've just started dating a guy and I agree it's SO easy to eat out all the time. He lives a little over an hour away so while it's not really long distance we only spend about one evening together a week so we tend to indulge. He's got a gorgeous, buff body other than a tiny bit of a stomach but when he tightens it he has an almost 6 pack. Yum. He runs 8-10 miles a day 4 or 5 days a week on the treadmill at the gym. Anyway, he is wanting to loose about 10 pounds so we are going to motivate each other from here on out. Instead of going out when I see him this weekend I am going to make a crock pot meal. Lean beef roast of some kind, potatoes, veggies and rolls, the rolls are for him though, not me. I know the beef and potatoes can be high cal but I just need control and he can eat MORE without it being too terribly high in fat (like pizza).

He says he loves my body and is totally happy with the way I am now, and he's proud to show me off to people he knows (friends, family) but I can't help but think he'd like me to be a little less flabby. I want to be "curvy", not "skinny" right now I've got curves... as well as bulges and creases. I need to nix the bulges and creases!! =)

[Glory87]

Going out to eat is its own challenge, but even cooking healthy meals at home has pitfalls for me. I have to keep remembering portion control. When I dish up dinner for me and my boyfriend, the amount of food on the plates is definitely different! For example, if I make healthy burgers with whole grain buns and sweet potato fries, I serve myself half the fries he gets.

I can't eat equal to what he eats without gaining weight.

[Susie Derkins]

I second Faerie's point about shopping and cooking together. This is one thing I've tried with my boyfriend which has worked nicely.
We live together, so when I noticed we had fallen into some pretty unhealthy eating habits I felt that the best way out was to deal with it together. It helped that he'd put on some pounds, too - I think it helped him hear me when I suggested we buy healthier and eat healthier. At first, it wasn't easy to field off the requests for pizza and burgers, and the temptation to give in when he suggested we eat out, or get ice cream...but it was totally worth sticking it out.
Now we shop for groceries together, and try to cook together as often as our schedules allow...before, these things fell mostly to one or another of us depending on how busy each of us was, but rarely to both at the same time. It's also led to him doing the dishes more, now that he realizes what it's like to cook AND clean up!
But I feel like this was a good way to make weight loss more of a team effort, rather than an individual struggle.