First of all ... please don't apologise Meg. You've put a tremendous amount of thought and work into this book discussion and a bunch of us appreciate that beyond words.
I think what makes the 5 different from the 95 is the something that clicks. The same way many of us tried and tried and tried to lose weight but were only successful after something clicked.
I can empathize with the fellow who said “How do you get the reasons why you want to lose weight to be important enough to maintain that self control forever?” But I think he might be short-sighted and discounting the effect of practice practice practice. Just as having a doughnut for coffee break becomes a habit so does taking a walk after supper.
Different? Yes. However, I'm going to play the 'bloom where you're planted' card. It don't matter one hill o'beans if I can eat less calories than my skinny friend. If I am to remain thin, I must do what works for me. Fair? Nope but then who said life was fair? It ain't.
Life's work? I have no intention of becoming a personal trainer. I'm a clod, that would be funny!
I could become very wordy and angry with another discussion on the difference between dedication and obsession.
I know a gal who does needle-point in plastic. She must make dozens of horrible, chintzy looking things each year. Hour upon hour, day after day ... worrying lest she not finish enough for Christmas or Easter ... stewing because she made a mistake and has to rip out and do over.
She too must eat and move.
We all have to eat and move!
So what if my hobby is that eating and moving? I'll end up slim, fit and healthy. Why is that obsession and hers is dedication to her craft?
Eat good food. Move yourself. Lift something.