Hi Linda!
Boy your struggle does hit home... BIG TIME!
I can lose weight easily enough, but I hit a weight then just bounce back! I get really down in the dumps and angry so go and lose it again.. then bingo its back!
Try to maintain, until you can work out how you feel!
My goal this time around it to find control, not to lose weight!
I have the problem where I know there is something in my pantry I really want! (but was bought for the kids) and I cannot get rid of the feeling until they are all eaten! Or I see and ad on tv! It will hang in my head until I get it, but then that starts the thought "well I've eaten this, might as well go eat everything else" and one treat for a day, ends up a weeks treat.. then a month... until I scream STOP!
The thing that is helping me now it to think on what it was like when I was around 300 pounds! i never bought clothes! Had to stick to the 2 or 3 things I only owned, hated getting dressed, hated going out, hated anything! was housebound because I hated myself that much, couldn't take the kids out, or swimming, couldn't fit in cinema seats, felt horrible when I went out to eat so I always bought drive through, WAS JUST TOTALLY OUT OF CONTROL OF MYSELF! The self hate was Amazing! I just wanted to find a dark corner stick myself in it and pretend the world did not exist.
So when I feel the need to go reach into the cupboard and throw my plans smashing to the ground, I then think. DO I really want to go back to the days of being a blimp!
But I need to find the control in myself where i can say "yes I will have some chocolate. NOT ALL OF IT!" this is still a work in progress. Each time I show restraint and walk away only having eaten 1 serve, I then try to give myself a HUGE pat on the back! and think on how Wonderful and controlled I was. This also seems to be helping me. Postive thinking.
If you fall off the wagon now! you will only be back feeling worse in the future, Try to maintain you have done SOOOOO well!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Start writing down a food journel, and give yourself a reasonable amount of calories to follow so you can have some treats, but don't let yourself give up!
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