Dear impatient, self-loathing, self-pitying prick
That's right, you got on the scale again this morning. And you're still in the 320's.
After upping exercise, watching your 1900 daily calories like a hawk, and drinking only water (TWO gallons of it) a day, you're only down 5 lbs since December 2nd.
"Almost three months for 5 lbs, what a joke!" Is what you're thinking, right? "I walked/ran two miles today, plus lifted weights!"
I know you're thinking about trying something insane. You can eat only, say, 1000 calories a day, and kill yourself with cardio. That would make you lose fast, right? Or how about taking a shot at those 'awesome' crash diets that you've seen advertised everywhere? Why not, since all weight loss methods must be the same, right??
Repeat this after me: WRONG.
Did you get it? Let's try it again, to make sure it sinks in: WRRRRONG.
Seriously, you're close to your 50-lb milestone, and those awesome boots are sitting in a box on your floor, waiting for you. So buck up, and get back to counting those calories, and quit feeling sorry for yourself. You're down over 45 pounds! Forty-five!
You've still got the rest of your life ahead of you, this isn't a race. So quit acting like you have to lose it all in five minutes. It took you 21 years to decide to do something about it, didn't it?
Now calm down and go run for a while.
Me (the part of you that's still sane)
Next mini goal: 290
Next major goal: 280