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Old 11-16-2010, 08:18 PM   #1  
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Default Relighting the Fire

I'm hoping you will give me some feed back or advice on my current situation. Last Monday, I got in to the work out and my trainer and I were stretching out waiting for the rest of the team to get in and another trainer, a really great guy, walks over. They begin to discuss dedication and the second trainer says something to the effect of there are people who are really dedicated and there are the people who just are paying lip service to dedication, who make their workouts but don't make the choices outside the gym to support all the work they put in at the gym. Then he wanders off. As fond as I am of the second trainer, I don't know him very well and I don't know if that was pointed directly at me but it is completely appropriate.

It seems like it should be simple, that it should at least be habit for me now, after nearly two years. But I just get angry. Then I eat. We weigh in Friday or Saturday and I let things slip a little and by the end of the weekend, I'm eating what I want when I want and promising myself I'll be perfect the rest of the week. During the week, I do pretty well and usually make up for my "sins" of the weekend. But I can't seem to get excited or hopeful about the process; I'm not convinced I can get "there" from here - even when/if I lose the weight, I'm not going to look like a normal person or even good. Since June, work has been hellish -- new management has rumbled in and I've spent months wondering if how safe my job is and feeling hopeless about being able to do anything about it. That's not going to change anytime soon and being a stress eater, that's been my major outlet.

So I'm looking for ideas on how to get the mentality back. Just white-knuckle it for a day, a week? I know we've talked about commitment but after losing ~100 pounds in 1 1/2 years, suddenly I'm having a hard time believing I can. Thinking of it rationally, getting healthy, finishing the weight loss will only help me at work (or if the worst happens, getting a new job). I know I've made great physical improvements from 374 lbs and I haven't back slid back up more than twenty pounds. But I haven't made any appreciable gains in a while. Any thoughts on the experience? How to rekindle the fire?

Another thread asks if you've changed after losing so much wieght -- I haven't lost all my weight but I've lost a nice piece but I don't think I've really changed. Which may be the issue.

Thanks,

Barb
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Old 11-17-2010, 03:36 AM   #2  
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First of all, congratulations on your stupendous weightloss! Very impressive.

I do understand when the thrill goes out of it though. For me it's partly white-knuckling it - I wanted to overeat so much last night and I didn't and guess what? no significant weightloss snarl, sigh, whatever - but what I find works is creating, kind of, a new programme. So at the minute, I'm still investigating:
I'm looking for something slightly higher carb than I have been doing for the last 5.5 months. It seems to be a basic of our human nature to require more carbs in winter than in summer, so I've decided to work with that, rather than against it. I still won't eat processed rubbish and I'll stick within my calorie budget
except
I'm looking at a 30-day, 1200 calorie plan (that's 200 down on where I am at the minute), then transiting back up to 1400 over Christmas.

I find that doing this makes me feel almost like I'm just starting, it renews my concentration, and gives me newbie enthusiasm.

Hey, it's not wrong to get bored/tired of how far you've come with still a ways to go. Perhaps all it takes is a bit of renovating?

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Old 11-17-2010, 10:18 AM   #3  
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You've done amazing so far. I'm in the same situation of relighting the fire. I have so much further to go and I can't give up yet. Neither can you!
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Old 11-17-2010, 12:38 PM   #4  
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I wish I had an answer... I have never been able to pick myself back up and get back on track when I start to slack off. I have decided this time around I can't slack off... simple as that.

If I have a flub up day or even a flub up minute, then the next day or the next minute is a chance to start over and I can't allow myself to think well I already blew it so who cares what I do next!

I have also found going back and focusing on the basics helps on days that I want to go off course. I am a calorie counter so I spend a little while playing with where I will allot my calories throughout the day.
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Old 11-17-2010, 01:39 PM   #5  
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Originally Posted by findingfawn View Post
I wish I had an answer... I have never been able to pick myself back up and get back on track when I start to slack off. I have decided this time around I can't slack off... simple as that.
This is me too. It just isn't a choice anymore. I don't have any off plan days, I just don't. If I want a treat, I plan it in. And generally I just end up feeling like it's not worth it because I'd have to basically not eat anything the rest of the day. Some days I struggle a little, but generally I am very happy with my plan and it works well. Finding something that works for you and your lifestyle is key, I think.
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Old 11-17-2010, 05:47 PM   #6  
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Focus on short term goals.

To continue with the fire metaphor, start with tinder (a couple of weekends on plan too, white knuckle it if you have to - take strength from the fact you want to get "IT" back).

Short term goals again - add a little kindling (look for a 5# loss).

Put some sticks on that small fire - move again every chance you get - a couple more 5# loss increments.

Sounds corny - huh? Just an suggestion.
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Old 11-17-2010, 06:06 PM   #7  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keillynsmom View Post
Another thread asks if you've changed after losing so much wieght -- I haven't lost all my weight but I've lost a nice piece but I don't think I've really changed. Which may be the issue.
My life has changed drastically in the past few years, but sometimes I feel that I haven't changed much myself. Or that if I have maybe it hasn't really been for the better.

I've lost over 100 pounds, but still have about 100 to go. And I've been stuck around the 250 mark for about a year now, so I've really been struggling to figure this out myself. I sort of had a wake-up call earlier this week when my brother called and told me that he's lost 75 pounds (among other things) and is back to a healthy weight. I'm still so far from a healthy weight and have been at a loss on how to push myself any further. Right now I'm buckling down with reviewing what I used to do when I was last losing and doing a lot of soul-searching. I filled my fridge and cabinets with nothing but healthy fare, and have vowed to go out to eat much less. For me, getting back into exercising will be the hardest, so I'm trying to emotionally build myself up to taking walks again as a start (which can be extremely difficult for me as I have agoraphobia to deal with).

Anyway, I think the first step to getting the right mentality back is realizing that you need to. From there you have to take the steps and push with it until it feels "normal" again, I think. I believe it helps to have others to relate to with this, so I thank you for your post here. I know you can find the strength to do this, and perhaps I can find it again as well.
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Old 11-17-2010, 09:58 PM   #8  
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Thanks for the replies -- it really helps to be heard and I know the folks here the understanding and the experience that I need to hear. I can't let go this time, I can't stop, I have to get this done.

Thanks,

Barb
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