[Trazey34]

I can so relate. I also have the added bonus that when I eat bad stuff I still love it AND i never feel bad about it afterwards. Maybe a "d'oh I should have this instead" but I've never ever been one to beat myself up over food - maybe i should be!!! And I'm the same with unpleasant things -- i hate scrubbing toilets but it has to be done every few days like it or not. For me it was all about telling the whiny spoiled 8 year old who lives inside my mind that NO you just can't have whatever you want you brat, I'd like to actually LIVE to 70 or so, and not drop dead of a heart attack at 50, thank you very much!! LOL sometimes you just have to do unpleasant things, and hopefully they get more mechanical and routine and you dont' have to think about them any longer

[TraceyElaine]

You + me = same boat lol

I realy do know how you feel. I get so motivated and think for sure I am doing it this time and then somewhere along the way I fall. I see all these amazing people on 3fc who share their success stories and how they are doing it this time. I get all pumped up and do so well. And when fall off plan I think "How did I let it get me?" or "Why aren't I doing it this time?"

I guess there is just going to be a point where we make it happen. We will make the right choices untill we are there. We will not give in and take the easy way out. I think the important part to remember when we do fall behind, is that we must get back on and keep going...and going and going untill we get it right.

So don't give up, and I won't give up. And eventually we will get there even if it is through the scenic route.

*HUG!

[thinpossible]

Originally Posted by fiberlover

Being healthy and eating foods that are good for you are a joy and a priviledge! Don't ever think of treating your body with respect as a punishment. The punishment is staying fat.

I'll work on this perspective

Originally Posted by grabec

And I really understand your motivation coming and going and everything else you said. A guy who is dealing with a drug problem told me that every day he has to make decision after decision off and on to not use. I guess that is the way eating is too but doing it sometimes is just out of the question. I totally relate to your post and you can email me privately and we can keep in touch if you want. [email protected]
g

Yeah, I can difinitely relate. Sometimes the craving is so strong it seems impossible to resist for an hour.

Originally Posted by Jennelle

4. Keep your goals small. My doctor cracks me up; he says, "I just want my pound of flesh....a week." So my first goal is 52 pounds in 52 weeks. That is plenty doable and leaves room for a gain here and there.

I thought I was keeping my goals small, but maybe I still have the "how fast can I get this off" mindset that usually trips me up. I'll have to think about this more. Thanks for the tips

Originally Posted by gymlee

I'm going to reiterate the fact that it is a really hard go with things like this and I don't think your commitment is waning in the least. You just may need some help dealing with the issues that are driving you to overeat and if you don't deal with they are going to continually come up and sabotage you over and over again. It's very important to deal with them and learn ways of conteracting it by prevention and putting recovery behaviors in place when you do have a freak out and binge. We're all human and we all go through rough patches. It's a matter of looking at what has gone wrong and learn how to do things better from those mishaps. It's rough but I'm positive you're resilient enough to do it.

Thanks. I have thought a lot about the emotional issues that are related to my compulsive eating (hello, two alcoholic parents) but I'll dig around a bit more. Thanks for the vote of confidence in my commitment.

Originally Posted by midwife

So I guess my point is that sometimes it is just HARD. And sometimes we have to make ourselves do things we don't want to do. But as an adult, I am in charge of what I put in my mouth and the consequences of those actions. Sometimes I'll even say out loud "I am in charge of this choice.

I never regret eating on plan. I am not sitting here wishing I would have had a cheeseburger yesterday. I am pleased with the choice I made.

Yeah, you're right. And thanks for all the awesome support you given me since day one here at 3FC. You have been a real encouragement to me.

Originally Posted by shatteredfallendove

commimetment is a hard thing to follow through. sometimes motivation comes through encouraging words. So heres some. YOU CAN DO IT. IT will be hard, but its worth it. Try to keep youyour self positive, when your negative toward yourself it might trigger a binge.

Thanks

Originally Posted by susiemartin

I've had the same thing going on all week

The day starts out good & ends up OP

Well, hang in there!

Originally Posted by cfmama

I think it's always important too to eat FOODS THAT YOU LIKE!!!! So if you hate oranges but you love apples... it's OKAY to eat apples and forgo the oranges... as long as it's still a healthy choice right?

You can't change your eating habits for life if you don't like what you are

You know the weird thing is, sometimes I DON'T like binge foods, and if I'm in a binge frame of mind I eat them anyway, even though I don't want them. I was in the Drive Thru at Sonic yesterday, and what I really wanted was some cottage cheese and pineapple. I ate the burger anyway.

Originally Posted by WarMaiden

I take a lot of daily pleasure in the small changes that are happening over time. Basically, those little NSVs. Perhaps focusing more each day on how your body is changing in positive ways will help you see that you're not just benefitting long-term, you are also benefitting short-term.

I did this a lot in the beginning, I need to get back to it

Originally Posted by kelly315

For most of us, it takes a lot of tries and failures to get to a point where you can start to have permanent loss. I think that the only reason any of us are able to succeed is because we've failed so many times, and gotten to know what we can do and what we need. All I can say is, never stop trying, no matter how many times you feel like you've failed. It will eventually push you to the right mindset and place in your life that you need to succeed.

Just keep going!

Thanks

Originally Posted by Windchime

Maybe you need a new prize system!

I'll think about this.

Originally Posted by wendyland

Thanks for posting this thread. I'm having a really hard time sticking to my plan. It helps to read all of these posts for inspiration. There are so many factors that go into our overeating that it's no wonder that it's a struggle. There's such an abundance of food in our society. Bad foods make you want more bad foods. Going out with friends for social events.

When I lose sight of my goals, I come here and read. I also keep my mom in mind. She died last summer of a heart attack at age 45. She was about the same size as I am right now. I know that I eat better & exercise, but I don't know if it's still good enough. I don't want to leave my girls without a mom. I don't want to leave this planet when I'm not ready to.

I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I can really relate to what you said

Originally Posted by ConfessorSiuan

I too am in the same boat. My eating is up and down. I'm working really hard at it, it's much more difficult than getting exercise in. Right now I exercise everyday but I'll have good days and good hours and then out of nowhere I want something and I don't know how to talk myself out of it. I've been working on healthy snack options, as this is a big thing for me. In another thread someone said they ate carrots I tried that for four days this week and it worked. I will continue this with other cut up fruits and veggies. Good luck, you can do it!

Thanks

Originally Posted by kaplods

I have sticker charts for weight loss, exercise, and (unrelated to weight loss) writing my novel.

Maybe I'll try stickers

Originally Posted by Trazey34

For me it was all about telling the whiny spoiled 8 year old who lives inside my mind that NO you just can't have whatever you want you brat, I'd like to actually LIVE to 70 or so, and not drop dead of a heart attack at 50, thank you very much!! LOL sometimes you just have to do unpleasant things, and hopefully they get more mechanical and routine and you dont' have to think about them any longer

Yeah, I have that same 8 year old.

Originally Posted by TraceyElaine

I guess there is just going to be a point where we make it happen. We will make the right choices untill we are there. We will not give in and take the easy way out. I think the important part to remember when we do fall behind, is that we must get back on and keep going...and going and going untill we get it right.

So don't give up, and I won't give up. And eventually we will get there even if it is through the scenic route.

*HUG!

I sure hope you're right

[risab]

I just re-started Weight Watchers, so I am eager to succeed. But, I, too, have a hard time staying loyal to my plans. Usually after 5-6 weeks. I have vowed that this is not a journey to failure. I will never, ever join WW again after this journey....soooo I am counting on it to work 'with' me this time. This journey that we are ALL on with similar reasons is simply a journey! You are going from point A to point B AND how you get there, how long it takes you to get there, etc, is so small compared to the invaluable lessons you learn along the way. You will get there because you have already decided to get there. There are no failures unless you quit.
Best of luck to you.....Look for me in about 4 weeks to give me some support. That's about the time I decide to give up. But not this time, I tell you!

[risab]

What does OP mean?

[JayEll]

In this thread, it seems to mean "on plan," but OP also sometimes means "original poster."

Jay

[kaplods]

I'm prone to quitting when I can't be perfect. Frustration and feeling deprived make me feel "what's the use." One of the reasons I think I'm sticking with it this time (haven't had a significant gain in 4 years, so there's definitely unusual progress for me, even if the weight loss is less consistent), is that I changed my thinking to "I don't have to be perfect, I just need to be better).

I wouldn't recommend the "snail's way" to anyone else, and those 4 years were very complicated (and the vast majority of my weight loss occured in the last year), but I do think it's very important to avoid the "what's the use," thinking because it can inspire quitting (big or small). Even deciding "what's the use, I might as well eat whatever the heck I can fit into my gut, and start fresh tomorrow/Monday/first of the month. Either way, it isn't just starting fresh, because it's not like picking up where you left off, because you backtracked. Truly picking yourself up after the first hint of a mistake, can be starting fresh and can happen daily, or ten times daily and still not keep you from making progress.

If you trip on a step, don't throw yourself to the bottom of the staircase. It's such obvious advice, and yet so difficult to follow, because it's a culturally ingrained habit. On some level, we're taught that binges are supposed to follow mistakes. At least we're taught to expect the possibility that frustration can lead to "I'll eat like a madwoman until tomorrow/Monday/first of the month morning."

Changing even one small habit can have miraculous results. We just don't look for small miracles, we tend to look for big ones.

[thinpossible]

I had no water this weekend, and I have a HORRIBLE headache from dehydration. I ate junk which didn't even taste good. I feel so yucky. I'm like a dog who digs in the garbage just because I know I'm not supposed to I am back on plan tomorrow for reals. DEAR GOD, PLEASE LET ME REMEMBER HOW CRAPPY IT FEELS TO TREAT MY BODY LIKE CRAP. If I had a fairy godmother, I think instead of wishing to be thin, I'd wish to remember how I feel right now.

[JazzyPeggy]

This was a great thread. The title really caught my attention. I am having the same problem. NO committment whatsoever. I can't even decide which diet plan to go with not even for a day. Just last week I told a friend, I am having a problem with committment. So this morning, I decided to come to
3FC and get motivated. And I'm so glad I did, this was a great place to start.

And I know what you mean, Thin. Recently I have eaten more food, when my stomach was already hurting from overeating, and I just felt even worse. With me, it seems at times I am rebelling. "Don't tell me I can't eat anything else, I'll just show you."

So I'm going to start my committment today. Just for today, I'm going to do WW. And then tomorrow I'll make the same promise again.

I like the Losing 5 pounds in 2 weeks goal, I think I'm going to try just to show myself I really can do this.

Thanks, Thin for this thread and everyone that replied. This was an awesome thread.

[GirlyGirlSebas]

I could have written your original post. Isn't it eerie how so many of us fight the exact same battle?

For me, I've made a promise to myself that I will never give up. I'll keep going at this until I get it right. Sometimes, I'm embarrased to have been on this site and posting regularly since November 2006, however, I've only managed to lose 30 pounds. However, I'm still trying and I hold on tightly to that small kernel of success with both hands!

Don't give up on yourself! Keep trying!

[yoyoma]

Rhonda -- managing to lose 30 lbs over 3 years is awesome! First of all, it's over the 10% mark which is very worthwhile. Secondly, any progress is better than success followed by regain which is my usual pattern (working on nipping that in the bud this time round).

To the OP, I have problem with boredom and stress eating too. I find that a nice hot cup of tea with a little non-fat powered milk and 0-cal sweetener really helps in that case. Other folks find crunchy carrots or whatever helpful, but the process of making the tea and then having a nice hot comfort drink really helps me whether I'm bored or stressed. Good luck!

[thinpossible]

Originally Posted by yoyoma

To the OP, I have problem with boredom and stress eating too. I find that a nice hot cup of tea with a little non-fat powered milk and 0-cal sweetener really helps in that case. Good luck!

Thanks, I'll put powdered milk on my grocery list this week

[midwife]

Originally Posted by thinpossible

DEAR GOD, PLEASE LET ME REMEMBER HOW CRAPPY IT FEELS TO TREAT MY BODY LIKE CRAP. If I had a fairy godmother, I think instead of wishing to be thin, I'd wish to remember how I feel right now.

If I had a dime for every time I've had to relearn that lesson!

Today I wanted to binge on a breakfast burrito.
So I broke down my thought processes:
If I eat a ginormous breakfast burrito, I will feel sluggish, become massively dehydrated (I get so thirsty after salty foods these days), have IBS symptoms, and be thoroughly ticked off with myself. I kept visualizing all of those consequences and then I visualized a breakfast that was on plan, but hit those main taste points I wanted---beans, chile, cheese, eggs.

But it's taken me a few years to get to this point, and I can do this about 70% of the time. The other 30% I have to relearn again WHY it is not a good idea to eat a ton of food that is unhealthy for me. This is a very conscious thought-out process for me....I really do take it "Step 1, Step 2, Step 3".

Maybe someday it will become second nature, but for now it is not. It is a million little choices every day, every minute. It's okay that it's hard sometimes--if it were easy, every one would do it.

What matters is that you are still here, still trying, still kicking, thinking about ways to reach your goal.

On the words of the great philosopher Rocky Balboa, it's not how many times you fall, it's how many times you get up. So keep trying, keep trucking, even if there are missteps along the way, it's okay, cause what's the alternative?

[kaplods]

I think our diet "culture" works against us, and may contribute to the dismal success rate of dieting. We're taught to expect ourselves to be perfect. And that's how many of us start (or continue) to diet. Counting the days before we "fall off the wagon," and calling every mistake or misstep "failure."

I think weight loss is more a very complicated set of skills - like learning to play a musical instrument. We wouldn't expect anyone to be able to play a musical instrument perfectly from the start, but that's what we expect from ourselves when we're dieting. Another major error in thinking, is what normal weight loss looks like. Because we hear that the "safe" rate of weight loss is 1/2 to 1% of our body weight weekly (for most folks 1 or 2 lbs), it's easy to believe that those 1 to 2 lbs are typical or normal, and if we don't at least lose 1 to 2 lbs every week, we're not really succeeding.

I used to be able to lose 6 lbs or more a week consistently when I was younger, and at a similar weight. With my current health issues, I'm lucky to lose 1 lbs a week (I'd be very lucky to lose 1 lb a week). Several months ago, I was whining to my doctor that the weight was coming off so slowly, and he "set me straight." He told me that even at my weight, even 1 lb a month or less, lost consistently was far better than most folks (again, of any weight) do, because most folks give up. It made me realize (if weight loss were compared to a race) that I wasn't trailing at the end, in last place - I was actually in the lead - even with my "pitiful" weekly losses).

I do wonder how many people "at the head of the pack," think they're trailing in everyone else's dust, just because they don't understand or acknowledge how difficult and complicated weight loss can be. It's like if you gave two people a saxaphone and told one that most folks learn to play very well in about two weeks, and you told the other person that it would take years - I don't think it would be a mystery which person would be likely to feel like a failure (and increase odds of giving up).

I really think that acknowledging how terribly difficult weight loss can be, has been one of the most important factors in why I'm still succeeding, where in the past I would have given up (and restarted, and given up) a dozen times or more by now (probably with only weight gain to show for it).

Just the simple act of realizing that this IS difficult, keeps me going. It's no mystery why I find this difficult - it IS difficult. But, I've done difficult things before, and people do difficult things all of the time (and persistence is always half the battle). Most difficult things are difficult because they're not one action or skill, they're many smaller actions and skills that need to be mastered. So part of losing weight successfully and keeping it off, is being aware of, and working on all of the smaller skills that will result in ultimate success. Analyzing what doesn't work, and trying to find out what will.

It can be frustrating (but doesn't have to be, attitude is also a large part of the battle), but we've got to be lab rat and scientist to discover our own pathway to success. Analyzing why mistakes were made is one thing, but blaming ourselves generally is pointless and counterproductive, because if we think we're failing, the next step is seeing ourselves as failures, and failures give up - it's what they do.