frustrated
 

I don't know what's wrong with me, but every time I have a big successful week, I have a gain. I don't just mean successful in terms of a big weight loss, but like, okay, the week after I finally got out of the 300s, I gained. And then last week I hit my 5% and this week I gained. And I don't mean 1/2 lb, but over 2lb gain. And it's not right away -- i will be fine all through the week, but then something happens on the weekend and I don't keep track as much, which leads to me overeating.

It's not the program, because the rest of the time I lose. I don't know if it's some weird mental thing, where because I hit a milestone I feel like I can relax and celebrate a bit or what, but it's so frustrating, but only because I know the only person at fault is me.

Does it help at all if I tell you you're not alone in this behavior? I still find myself doing this sometimes, almost two years and 150 lbs into this process.

For example, the week before last I had a great weigh-in and got very close to getting out of the 170s. I went camping, planned for the foods I would eat but then allowed myself to overeat which set off a few more days of overeating. The result being that I undid that great weigh-in and have spent the past week working to get back to that spot. Frustrating to say the least but at the same time, it's not the end of the world. I read a good quote the other day - I didn't fall off the wagon but I put my foot down on the ground for a bit. That will happen. We're not perfect!

Look at why you are doing it, what the circumstances are and then what you can to do change/modify those behaviors. Keep repeating this as needed. I think for at least some of us, this is an ongoing thing. Sometimes we will take one step back for every two steps forward. I think the key is not to give up and not to berate or punish ourselves for the less-than-ideal behavior.

Hi Tudor Rose, are you rewarding yourself with something non-food?? I like to do that. I am tempted to go and grab some chocolate since the weight on the scale went down. And then it hits me! Nooooo! I rather do something like a facial mask at home, or a new iphone app (free or 99ct?) or go watch a movie etc.
I also set mini goals and really make a point choosing a reward for the next one right after I reached one. It is exciting and the anticipation is part of the fun. It doesn't have to be something big or expensive but something I really want. It is not necessarily the reward that keeps me going but definitely makes sure I am not leaning back for a few weeks.

You are definitely not alone! I have done this time and time again. When I do really well, I 'reward' myself with food. Sometimes it is subconscious and sometimes conscious. Also, when I get below a certain number, I often gain back that weight right away, because I think I am uncomfortable at too low of a level. Perhaps you are 'comfortable' at your current size, or you are 'afraid' of success? A lot of people don't understand me when i talk about being afraid of being thin, but since I've been overweight for a long time, it has become a part of my identity in some ways, and it is hard to break that pattern of thought! Weight is often a blanket for people, so perhaps there is fear of success wrapped up in your behavior? I'm still trying to figure this out for myself too, so I don't keep this yo-yo pattern up! Hang in there, you are doing well! :)