Why do I still see the 'Big' girl?
 

Hi Everyone!

I've been getting a LOT of compliments and today after Zumba one of the instructors came up to me gushing over how great I looked. I mean don't get me wrong the compliments are nice and I may even be getting a bit of an ego - lol! The issue I'm having is when I look in the mirror I still see the 267lb girl I was 11 months ago. Today while doing Zumba all I could think about was the reflection in the mirrors and how awful I looked. I'm a pretty positive person and know I've worked hard to get where I am but I can't seem to see what every one else does. Does anyone else experience this? I know there HAS to be a name for it in my Psychology Book!

I think it might just be habit? I don't know but you create a mental image of yourself based on how you look over a long period of time and then it changes and it takes a while for the mental image to catch up to the actual image maybe? I remember back to being pregnant and being so surprised by my reflection, not recognizing myself in the mirror. Maybe because your appearance changes so relatively quickly when you're pregnant the mental image lags behind somewhat? Perhaps the same happens in reverse with weight loss??

I never think I look good, so I can totally relate. I hate mirrors at the gym - or anywhere! ;-) Most of the time I feel very uncomfortable when I'm in social situations, though my husband says it's "all in my head." I feel like numbers don't lie, so how can it be in my head? But I think there's something to be said for confidence making up for a lot. The other day I was feeling pretty good - not about my looks, but just about my day, my progress, my work...and I got hit on! By a really cute, young guy at this coffee shop. I was so shocked and at first I didn't know why he kept talking to me. I was honestly confused. But, you know, I was just out grabbing a coffee, feeling good and not thinking about how awful I (think I) look. I probably appeared very different, even though I only lost 2.8 lbs. last week.

So I guess my long-winded point is, on days you're feeling crappy try to focus less on the mirror and more on the mind. You're working really hard, and you HAVE worked so hard. You look great! Enjoy it. And on those days you can't, fake it until you make it. That's what I'm trying to do more of, at least.

Body dismorphic disorder. Google it.

I just took a look, that sounds like pretty serious stuff! I don't think I'm that obsessed YET to the point where I need medication. I just wish I saw what everyone else does, maybe I'll be happy once I get to goal!

It's also in this magazine I'm reading about this lady who lost her weight also but still, not happy. You have made a great change losing from what your stats say, 84.6 pounds.. that is half my body.

keep buying those smaller sizes and you'll realize what other people see or, keep those *biggger* pants and say I used to *fit* in those babies. You might change a bit then.

Kim....I can speak from dealing with this myself. In 2005 I went from 215 to 150 and still saw myself as the big girl. Despite wearing anything I wanted to from any store and getting tons of compliments I still felt big. Go back and look at old photos, look at old clothes, put those clothes on and let them fall off. Eventually you'll get that you are "one hot momma!!"

I think too as women we all have these tendacies, even when we hit our goal weight.. we never see ourselves as we truly are we just see the areas we want to fix.. once the weight is off it's wanting to tone those abs, or those thighs or bigger boobs, hate my nose.. the list goes on and on for each of us. My husband tells me all the time that he wishes I could see myself through his eyes, lol.. and I do too!!! LOL

From what you said sorting, that explains why so many over weight woman don't relize they don't look good in tight pants.
They don't see it that way.