quotes on whether WLS is the "easy way out"?
 

I am doing an informational speech on Gastric Bypass for my Oral Communications class in college. (Yes, I even went back to college because of the confidence I have after surgery!!)

Over the years, the phrase "the easy way out" has come up over and over again when I tell people I had WLS. In this speech I am trying to explain how that is a misconception and would like to add some quotes to my speech from those of you that have had WLS. The speech won't be published and I won't mention names.

Please add a quote to this tread. Mine is...."If there were an easier way, I would have taken it!" or "Desperation was my motivation"

Thanks,

Angela

good point, Jill. I will add to my speech the fact that we still have to diet, we still have to exercise and we still have to struggle to keep it off.

Thanks for your help, honey!

oh wow. here's a bit of a rant - take whatever you want from it

so, i'm sitting here, 8+ years out, facing a presentation to a major medical society on Saturday, a freelance project that's due on monday, and a new job that's starting on monday. i ate. it came back up. does anyone honestly believe that i'd opt for this if i had another choice?

try gaining and losing nearly 1000 pounds over your lifetime. see what happens to your metabolism

it's not about LOSING the weight - it's about having the best chance for KEEPING IT OFF

think about it - if you're an emotional eater. your main way of coping with the world is GONE. So, instead of swallowing your emotions, you have to deal with them - and then you wonder why relationships change. And people say that you've gotten *****ier since the surgery. WELL, that's not what happened. I'm now SAYING these things, rather than swallowing them.

I WANT TO LIVE!!!! I don't want to obsess about every blessed mouthful that I eat or drink, and I don't want to have to exercise 3-4 hours a day. I want to live a healthy, balanced life. I'm willing to watch what I eat, exercise an hour or more a day, and enjoy myself. Just like you.

I'm done with beating myself up. and I'm WAY done with feeling ashamed of myself. So, all of you who think this is the easy way out and feel you have to judge me - GET OVER YOURSELVES. Leave me alone. Stop judging.

wow Jiffy...so much to choose from and sooooooo TRUE!

thanks, honey!

Why do people judge wls so hard, when probably 99% (just a % guess) of the people that have it do it for some sort of medical reason. But go get some other surgery like bigger boobs, fake lips, hair replacement or something cosmetic and thats considered ok... where are our priorities? Why not deal with what you have..... or is it to hard? wouldn't these surgeries be considered the easy way out (of dealing with insecurities)?

I wonder if they had surgery for alchoholics .... would that be considered the easy way out?

I really don't know where I'm going with this but every time i hear the words WLS and easy way out in the same sentence I see RED!!.

oy vey lol.

Another point I always say to uneducated people about weightloss. For a smoker...they can quit smoking...and do not have to have cigarettes ever again or have to have them to even live. Buttttttt a person who has to lose weight will always be tempted by food, as we HAVE to eat to remain alive.

For me, it was the only way out. Any of the other ways had proved impossible.

Hi all, I don't post often, but believe me I have learned so much from all here during my weight loss journey. I have not had wls, but did consider it and had many drs talk to me about it. People always ask me how I lost my weight. When I say calorie counting and exercise, they always say, "Oh, you did it the right way." I always share with them that we each have our own right way! What an accomplishment for all of us to try and then make progress towards living a healthier life style. All my best to you all!

I personally have not had WLS but one of my best friends had it and the other one will have hers tomorrow morning. I watched my friend have complications from her surgery and become seriously ill. She lost her job because she couldn't go back, nothing easy about that. She lost most of her hair and had to buy a wig while her own hair grow in. She was tired all the time and not prepared for the emotional aspects of not being able to eat the things she enjoyed. I see nothing, absolutely NOTHING easy about WLS. It is the last resort for people who have tried over and over again unsuccessfully to lose weight and keep it off not to mention the health benefits she gained from having it. No longer taking BP or diabetic meds.
Anyone who considers WLS as the easy way out needs to have to suffer through some of the possible side effects for just one day before they open their mouth IMHO.

Originally Posted by Brown:
I think this quote goes against the goal of her speech, though. This agrees that it IS the easy way out. I thought she was trying to say that it's NOT.

This is my personal opinion - for me, **** YES surgery made losing weight easier. But why is that so wrong? Why should we be made to feel inferior for choosing something that makes getting healthier easier? And, as I went on to say, while it makes LOSING weight easier, there is still work to be done in the long term.

I'm so sick of hearing about the "easy way out"! My brother informed me that the "easy way out" was not for him. He can't walk, ride a bike, bend over and sits in front of the computer continually. He is killing himself. My weird sister informed me that she isn't taking the "easy way out" and has lost 70 some pounds through WW. I'm so happy for her, but been there done that and gained all 125 pounds back after I stopped WW. I chose LIFE with WLS. I lived in a world of joint and back pain, diabetes, immobility. Sat in my own small little dark world, because I thought I would never be able to care for myself or my family again. I have huge hernia from repeated abdominal surgeries, I can't eat concentrated sugars, I throw up easily on bread and chicken. I clog up if I eat too fast and have to wait for hours before I get rid of the pain and can eat again. Would I choose LIFE again? HECK YES! And even with a fake knee I can and will run people down who say the EASY WAY OUT and kick their butts! Or I could just as easily throw up on them.....LOL~ I'm gross! THE EASY WAY OUT......BS! I AM ALIVE!!!!

I say "High five for the easy way out!" I'm with jillybean -- who cares if it's "easy?" Anybody who thinks fat people should suffer and do things "the hard way" is just a judgmental jerk and I couldn't care less if they think I'm somehow "cheating." It hasn't been easy, but it's been a **** of a lot easier than the 40 years of yo-yo dieting that led up to it! And I say "Thank God for the easy way!"

Originally Posted by nanj:
My weird sister informed me that she isn't taking the "easy way out" and has lost 70 some pounds through WW. I'm so happy for her, but been there done that and gained all 125 pounds back after I stopped WW

Yes, this bugs me, I am not overweight enough to have WLS, but losing is the easy part, maintenance is the hard part. WLS is high risk because of the high BMI patients, if you could get a procedure (not suggesting any of the big ones, but something designed for purpose) when you are at or close to your target weight that stopped you putting it all back that would be really useful, and much lower risk.

I don't see how it's an easy way at all, you don't get to eat cheeseburgers and still lose weight, you have to eat tiny portions, tinier and more restrictive than anyone else, and it's enforced on you for ever more. It's not "cheating" it's a different way of eating smaller portions of food, you still have to do it. Some fail with WLS also because you can pack a lot of calories in a tiny tummy if you choose to experiment with exactly how much you can eat rather than sticking to the plan. I've not had any WLS but I really don't see it being an easy way. In any case, if it's physically and emotionally any easier to eat less with a small stomach rather than going on craving a Big Mac and being in tears that you cannot eat one then there was a metabolic fault to start with, it's just been corrected now.

I came very, very close to having WLS, and I have 4 friends who did. It is anything but easy. Its a TOOL to help you, same as Chantix can help you quit smoking or Antibuse can help you quit drinking - but in the end its YOU that makes it work. To really truly lose the weight you must watch your calories, eat very low carb, and exercise religiously - all while trying to adjust your life to the loss of your coping mechanism - food. They change your body not your mind, so now when your brain wants to eat, eat, eat, your body can't do that - and people are at risk of transfer addictions - drugs, shopping, alcohol. You can't take a day off for your birthday, or Thanksgiving, or the office party - too much fat, sweets or alcohol and you will be very very sick - too much food and its coming back up. Ok granted in a perfect world we would not eat those things - but life happens. Thats not easy to me. The only part I'd say is easy - and its not even "easy", its just a great motivator - is being able to have the consistent weight loss, that would keep me really motivated. Whenever I backslide its because I had a stall. I know WLS'ers stall also but its usually for weeks and not months. I do know a person who had WLS and just ate smaller portions of the same crap - she lost 100 lbs in the first year - and has gained about 60 back. What people don't realize is WLS is a big huge learning process and that is not easy! Losing the weight is 25% of the battle - then you have the rest of your life ahead of you and you need to keep the weight off, take your vitamins, get adequate protein. Its not like lose it and your done. As a person who came real close to having WLS I think (at least where I went) the pre-op education is not enough. They tell you how much weight you can hope to lose, they bring in skinny post ops to sell the surgery....and try to drive home the fact that yes you will lose large amounts of weight. They don't tell you how much work it actually is.

I had a lapband put in March 2008 and lost 30lbs in the first 3 months... I thought I had found the perfect solution and would be skinny by the end of the year. However, it just didn't work for me, my doctor could never get it adjusted right. I could either eat everything or throw up everything. After two and a half years I had him take out all the saline and started Ideal Protein. I've now lost more on that program then I did with the lapband. Although I'm not a success story with the lapband, it definitely has helped me learn new ways to eat.

Those that say this is the easy way out, have no clue what they are talking about. You still have to make appropriate choices. There are ways to binge and cheat after WLS. However not with some of my previous favorite foods! One of the biggest lessons I've learned is patience. Just stick to healthy eating and portion control and eventually the weight will come off. I used to be a carb addict and now I stay clear of them. I also used to be the pickiest eater, but now I love putting a ton of vegetables into every meal.

Luckily for us we don't have to listen to naysayers... everyone knows what works best for them and that is all that matters :)

Angela - how did the presentation go? i'm sure you were fabulous - but inquiring minds are curious!!!!

Not doing it for two weeks, Jiff. I will let you know!

This thread was quite a conversation starter! Woohoo!

IMO, there is NO easy way out. It's a decision each individual has to make for themselves. I knew a woman who had WLS 10 years ago. At that time, I was 25 years old and felt so bad for her. I told myself that I would NEVER go through that and that I could just diet and exercise if and when I was ready. Well, here I am 10 years later with a RNY-GB scheduled for December 2nd, 2010. 35 years old and tired of yo-yo dieting. Now, I'm ready to do almost anything to feel good again and to be able to live life.

I'm late to this thread (that's what I get for being a lurker:^:) but my favorite analogy is this:

If you were in a burning building would you take the exit right in front of you or would you run up the stairs to the roof, find the emergency exit stairs on the outside of the building and climb down them, all the while hoping you stay ahead of the fire?

I was one of those people who looked at WLS as the easy way out too. Then I watched my mom get the lap band. She was one of those people who had tried it all. Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, SlimFast, calorie counting, NutriSystem...you name it and she had probably tried it. She has always struggled with her weight while her parents and siblings were lean and healthy always. She became prediabetic. She was on medication for high cholesterol and high blood pressure. After so many years of living with excess weight her knees have no cartilage left and grind and ache constantly. One of her friends had gastric bypass and went from a size 24 to a size 4. She looks and feels great. Ma finally researched WLS for herself and chose the lap band over gastric bypass. Even though medically she needed the surgery, her insurance didn't pay a dime. $15,000 in the hole just to get healthy. She found a doctor in Atlanta who let her work out a payment plan and she had the surgery in January 2008. She has lost 75 pounds but is stuck at 245 and can't seem to get the scale to budge.

After seeing my mom go through the surgery and still struggle with weight loss I know that WLS isn't for wimps. It is a lifelong struggle. It may make dropping the pounds easier but even shelling out $15,000 doesn't make it an easy fix.

Having surgery was the hardest and best decision I ever made. But I still sometimes feel like my weight loss has less value because of these kinds of opinions. I know it isn't true, but I still think it.

Anyway, I tried for years and would do well, then gain right back. I was afraid that while I tried to find something that worked for me that I would die, leaving my daughter motherless. I won't lie, surgery wasn't easy, but it has been a heck of a lot easier than anything else. For once, my body punishes me when I do badly or make a bad decision. Before, it would punish me when I made good ones and reward the bad. I was hungry and crabby when doing well, satisfied with an elevated mood when I ate too much. Sure, I had guilt when I did bad, but the positive effects of the food always won. My body now makes me feel good when I eat appropriately and my physical and emotional well being drop when I accidentally eat too much. So yeah, it is much easier, but I think I paid my dues for the decade before the surgery. Nobody says naturally thin people should feel bad about being thin because it was easy for them. And I still have to work hard every day.

I had surgery on December 7th, 2001. I have dropped from 310 down to 150 and now because of a job/activity change, I've crept back up to 180 pounds. This surgery is by no means an easy way out.

When I finally came to the conclusion that this was my only choice, I had already gone to my doctor and had tried many different diet and exercise plans and programs. From Weight Watchers to Meridia to Optifast to waking up every morning at 4AM and exercising for 2 hours before getting a shower and going to work. Nothing was working for me.

My doctor suggested weight loss surgery and I said no and continued working on it for another year. Finally I realized that there was something preventing me from losing weight the conventional way and I agreed to the surgery. Because of my documenting EVERYTHING for so many years through my doctor and through each of the organizations I went to, my surgery was approved in under an hour, and I started my surgery testing the next day. I was required to do the following prior to having surgery.

1. Go to my lawyer and have a will drawn up so that my affairs would be in order in the event of my death on the table or as a result of post surgical events.

2. Have a living will drawn up so that in the event of a catastrophic event occurring during the surgery or as a result of the surgery, that my decisions to be kept alive or to be allowed to die would be carried out.

3. Have a durable power of attorney created for my husband so that he could take care of my affairs while I was incapacitated, or prior to my disconnection from life support

4. If I wanted one, have a Do Not Resuscitate order put in my file.

None of the above legal documents support the statements made by others that this is taking the easy way out.

To put it a bit graphically, and to be a bit crass, I had my guts rerouted, as a last resort so I could save my own life.

After surgery I felt horrific. I felt like I had been ripped apart because my surgery was open, not laparoscopic. Believe me, that wasn't easy.

I am disgusted with people who feel that they have the right to judge whether or not a fat person is taking care of his or her obesity the "easy" way or the "legitimately difficult" way. It's all difficult, there is no easy way and there is NO END to it. Weight management for those of us with weight problems is a life time commitment, whether you have surgery or not.

People with weight problems are fair game for public ridicule and judgment. It's disgusting and it needs to end.

Ageed Jill...it was easier in a way...but not in the way that some people think it is.....eat a cheeseburger and lose weight anyway (someone actually said that the GBP didn't work for them because they could eat McD's 3 weeks after surgery and never lost much weight) but it is easier in the long run for those that stick to the plan, do the leg work, and DIET AND EXERCISE ANYWAY!

I am going to give a much better speech with all this input!!






Angela

I only briefly considered surgery for weight loss. I've already had plenty of surgeries in my life that I HAD to have. I've never had a doctor tell me to consider it so I don't think it would be considered medically necessary. I don't know. Did I ever think it was the easy way out? Um, no, surgery is like the last resort. I don't need anything else cut out of me or put into me, thanks. None of it is easy. Weight loss isn't easy. Life isn't easy. People who judge others for making choices to help their lives and make themselves healthier aren't people I want to know.

They judge you for being fat.

Then they judge you for doing something about it?

If there were fewer judgmental people in the world, it would be a much better place. ;)

Originally Posted by jency:
Although I'm not a success story with the lapband, it definitely has helped me learn new ways to eat.

Then I would consider that a success :) Congratulations.

I have been watching several seasons of The Biggest Loser, and that's a really high profile show, yet in each season these days they seem to have a contestant with a failed WLS. People can probably easily relate to TBL because it's such a big name, so might be useful to remind them of these people who had the surgery and still ended up on TBL because it didn't work out, and Ron (season 7 I think, maybe 6) had ongoing bleeding from the bypassed area of the stomach. So, big op, lifetime complications, possibly had to pay out of pocket for it and then it didn't work anyway. Easy way?

I'm sure people are going to judge my weight loss because I am getting plastic surgery at the same time. I am having it as a scar correction because of all the scarring from my other surgeries over the years (none of them are WLS) and a major operation at the same time, but still there will be some that say I got a better profile because of my surgery, and not only that but somehow think that massive surgery was easy!

I haven't had WLS. But what I do know, nothing about this is easy.

After struggling for 30 years with diabetes, my mom found out today that she no longer has to take insulin three months and 50 lbs after gastric bypass.

I took care of her in the hospital and when she got home. NOTHING about that surgery is easy. NOTHING about her recovery was easy. The mental work she had to do to get ready for surgery and the work she is still doing today are not easy. She works hard every day.

When she said she was going to start the process, I was scared for her health, scared of the surgery and its complications. But I NEVER thought she was taking the easy way out. Just fighting her insurance company was a battle in itself. I am so proud of her and respect anyone who can commit to this change.

I'm sorry for all the people being judged for WLS - how rude and ignorant!

I can only image the stories you have about what lead you to the surgery, there's nothing easy about it from what I understand, and even there were... so?!

A lot of people having WLS spend money they don't have and take time they can't afford off work for their surgery because it is essential for them!

People are naturally inclined to categorise and judge others for some reason. We all do what's right for us!

Not a candidate, just a sympathiser. I really think very few people take surgery and such a change in lifestyle lightly.

If WLS was right for you then you should be proud. Don't let other people and their ignorance detract from your happiness. :(

I am scared to tell people about my tummy tuck once it's been done. It's being done as a scar revision because I have a horribly misshapen scar all the way down my front plus another 3 across the way, one of which is terribly wonky cos they were trying to get my daughter out at a Csection and she was stuck fast really low down in the pelvis. They are taking out all the scar tissue and pulling the rest of the tummy together, but I fear that if I tell people I've had it done they will credit the surgeon with all of my hard work. It's crazy, a tummy tuck takes off at most about 2lbs and the sort I am having you actually cannot have if you are too overweight, but I bet if I mention it then all the ill-informed people will say I didn't have to work hard at my diet at all, I just had the surgery and it solved all my problems!

Good luck with your surgery. I hope everything goes smoothly and you love your new belly :)

I have dreamed about getting a tummy tuck for a few years but um, I keep getting fat again and I think I should put it off til I have kids. I'm also frightened.

Originally Posted by Sunday:
Good luck with your surgery. I hope everything goes smoothly and you love your new belly :)

I have dreamed about getting a tummy tuck for a few years but um, I keep getting fat again and I think I should put it off til I have kids. I'm also frightened.

Thanks. I was offered the surgery years ago and I decided not to have it because I was scared, mostly scared of how to look after my daughter and how on earth to go on with her needs when I was not to drive afterwards. But then it came up that I need some other surgery which happens to require another incision in my belly, so I asked if they'd throw in the cosmetic operation I'd already been approved for and they agreed to do it all in one, so at least I have something positive to look forward to while I am busy having to get over being hacked about inside. ;) Should lose an easy 5lbs that week when they take off the old skin, all my lady parts and some of the bowel, not to mention the 24 hour fast beforehand and the full bowel cleanse. Once I'm finished liquidating all the saline fluids pumped in I reckon I should be real skinny! :p

I love the look of my tummy now! Though I should have been scared, I wasn't. A bit nervous about surgery in general but I wanted the nice flat stomach at any cost!

Good luck honey, remember.....PAIN PUMP!!! I hear it makes all the difference!

Angela