hi Need to talk :)
 

:dizzy::?:Hi everyone,I hope everyone is doing great.I need to talk.This is a
support board and I love all of you.This last week,I noticed I
started eating alittle more,a few bites here etc,Also starting to eat
cereal in the evening,where my food plan is basically 3 meals a day
no snacks in between,and if I need a snack a healthy snack.Basically
the pre0op diet they suggest.

Anyways today for dinner I had cereal and bacon,what a combination. I
have been doing really well with my food and losing every week.This
week I stayed the same,and I am alittle scarred,I have this pattern
in the past when I get close to a certain number on the scale,I self
sabotage myself and start eating and gain the weight back.I am really
motivated to stay on my food plan, I just want to catch it early,so I
don't repeat the samething over again with my weight.It's like I do
really well and then it's almost like I say hey can't go any lower
than that weight,you might get too happy :) can't handle too much
happiness,which I no is insane.

I have been below my goal weight the doctor wants me at about 2
months now,they are really booked up,so there is a long waiting
list,looking more towards the first of the year,unless there are
cancellations and I am on the cancellation list,which has a waiting
list too.YIKES.

I want this surgery and no it is the right thing to do,I just don't
want to start gaining weight.

Any thoughts or suggestions, I would really appreciate it.

Take care
Kim e
pre-op ssf Kaiser

First take a deep breath. You are putting yourself under a lot of stress.

Now about the eating. I think sitting here typing to us ( not munching on anything ) is a good way to not eat ( I do that myself when I don't want to have anything else for the day, keeps my hands busy ). As you are thinking about why you are doing this, you are figuring out what to do all by yourself, stopping the cycle when you first see it happening. Nice going.

Sometimes I think people do fall into the trap of being afraid of being thin. How it will change their lives? Will they be able to live up to what they expect of them selfs when that day ( their weight goal ) happens? I have seen a few posts like that and have even heard a few people say something just like that.

You have worked hard, you deserve to be a healthy, thin person. Don't take that away from yourself. I know it can be hard sometimes. Maybe keep track of what you are eating, makeing sure you are getting a balanced diet. This will point out when you are eating things that don't give the body what it needs. Maybe spread out what you are eating over more meals. Just changing things a bit can help make things more interesting so that bad cycle doesn't start.

I agree! Hang in there! You just answered your own questions, by writing about your patterns. Now that you know what triggers them, YOU are in control,,,not food!!

oh boy - do i EVER have a lot to say about this - and it can all be summed up like this:

you're taking a long hard look at your eating patterns, and the reasons that you're eating. congratulations!!!! you've now identified a whole pile of issues for you to work on while you wait for your appointment!!!! and this isn't a time for moaning about it - it's a time for thinking about this, and making the small [and perhaps big] changes that you'll need to make after the surgery!

in short, THIS REALIZATION YOU'RE HAVING IS A GIFT!!

ok. let me get a bit more specific.

Anyways today for dinner I had cereal and bacon,what a combination

so, why are you stepping off your plan for this? what's going on that you believe so firmly that cereal and bacon, ie, carbs and fat!, are so necessary to you at night?

I self sabotage myself and start eating and gain the weight back.
hmmmm - fear of success, anyone? gotta look at this with an eye to understanding why you're afraid of doing well. trust me, there are many possibilities, but the only one that matters is the one that's YOURS!

I am really motivated to stay on my food plan, I just want to catch it early,so I don't repeat the samething over again with my weight.It's like I do
really well and then it's almost like I say hey can't go any lower than that weight,you might get too happy can't handle too much happiness,which I no is insane.

well, i don't think it's INSANE, but it's definitely something you need to deal with BEFORE the surgery.

and, before you think i'm lecturing you, let me just say here and now: you're raising and dealing with the stuff that just about every single one of us has had to face in order to make this work.

it's not always about the food - it's mostly about WHY the food, and how we feel about ourselves and our choices, and, most important, the fact that we MUST figure out how to take care of ourselves in ways that we never considered before.

it's a confusing time, and many of us turn to professional help. bottom line - be gentle with yourself. look at every meal you have, everything you eat, and ask yourself why you're eating - out of hunger? or out of need?

keep us posted, darlin. you're doing a wonderful job, and for right this second, you have a fabulous opportunity to learn about yourself and to figure out what you want to do differently.

go ahead - grab the chance!!!!

nice responce jiffy

I all, I fear this myself. I dont want to lose weight only to gain it back. I guess it takes great discipline. I have surgery on Oct 15th.

Being
I hope things go well.

thanks everyone
 

HI everyone thanks for all the great replies I appreciate it.

Being I wish you the best on your surgery,wow coming soon.Congratulations to you.:hug:
Kim e

Thank you all. Last night I dreamt that I had had WLS and I was ready to sit down for dinner and as I looked down to my plate and saw the food I panicked, I was afraid to eat...I didn't want to eat. I was afraid i would eat too much feel sick or worst, Get fat again.