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self esteem issue?
hey all im not sure if this is the right forum to post in but i will just go ahead
does anyone else try and please others, like constantly, like putting up with peoples S#!* all the time. i was just thinking to myself how I let people walk all over me and how I think that it probably comes with low self esteem and wanting people to like me, like not to sound super cheesy, but for people to like me dispite my fatness. I know that sounds really dumb it sounds dumb to me when i say it but I think it comes from being a chubby kid and wanting friends so doing anything to be cool, like, i wasnt even unpopular, i was always the funny one, i dont know iam just rambling here but I just started thinking is that really who I am, am I really the funny one who listens to ther peoples problems all day long and trys to help everyone out and gets walked over.....sorry for the sketchy post but its just really bothering me now *lol*:?: |
Cupcake, I definately feel like that person at times too. I think that even its more of a personality thing than a "chubby kid" thing. I really love people, and it makes me so upset to see other people upset that its almost as if i'm willing to sacrifice myself to make others happy...you might be the same way too. I'm struggling with it, but I find that I am at my best when I know what I want and what I need. People will think you are a better, more interesting, and more pulled together person when you are doing what you want and not necessarily dealing with everyone else's crap. Not to say you can't be helpful or sympathetic at times, just don't let them dump all their crap on you!!! I think that will make you feel the best about yourself! STAND UP FOR YOURSELF! and also know, its not just you that feels this way :)
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I completely know what you are talking about. I also credit my passiveness with being the chubby kid. I too was the funny 'go to' girl up until about 2 years ago. It sounds stupid but I was tired of being the nice girl. I didn't want to be her anymore and I didn't want guys to look at me like a sister anymore either.
I have 2 older sisters (we are very close in age) and they ALWAYS fought with each other.... I never did with either of them... or my parents... or anyone really. I always just gave in. Honestly it was because I didn't think people would like (or love) me if I was fat (I hate that word) AND a *****. All this changed about 2 years ago when I realized that I do have alot going for me... I was graduating with an honours BSc. in physics, I have a great relationship with almost everyone in my life, I have everything to be proud of. I do credit my past with who I am today and looking back, I am glad that I went through the hardest part of my life (puberty and adolesence) as someone who was not perfect. You are worth more than what you've been getting lately. It is okay be the 'go to' girl and to help other people with their problems, but you need to know that you TOO are allowed to ask for help or even...dare I say.... SAY NO to people. It does take time... and you will come across people who will say that you are being *****y or different than you used to be.... but take it in stride. You are on the right track... you've admitted that you are being walked over... so now do something about it!!!!! So stand up for yourself, you ARE worth it. -D. |
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