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Old 07-21-2006, 04:36 PM   #1  
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Question Suggestions for a pick-me-up?

OK, I had a bit of a heart-wrenching incident this afternoon, where I got my hopes up about something excellent and was unfortunately let down. My former employer interviewed me for a position I've been coveting for a few years (it's a few levels above where I am now). I got the sense that the person doing the interview (my mentor) was trying to convince me that I'm too extroverted to do the job. It particularly sucked to feel rejected by my best and favorite mentor, even though he probably interviewed me for it just out of respect. Anyway, I can't talk about this with anyone without tears coming to my eyes.

It's Friday night, my favorite "binge" night.

What are some things I could do instead of binge, to make myself a little happier? Drinking isn't an option.

I know a change of perspective can help: I've lost 60 pounds (the equivalent of a nine-year-old person), I'm gainfully employed, and my son and I are in good health. Not getting 'the perfect job' right now might just mean there's something even better in the cards for me.

What are some of your favorite pick-me-ups during times like this?
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Old 07-21-2006, 04:41 PM   #2  
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Go shopping! And when trying on clothes in X size think yourself, WOW I used to be size X.!!

Maybe go for a walk, go the movies (but stay away from the junk!), go get your hair done or your nails or something - treat yourself with something nice
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Old 07-21-2006, 04:45 PM   #3  
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sotypical, I thought you were going to say GET YOURSELF A PUPPY!
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Old 07-21-2006, 04:48 PM   #4  
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Well yes, I love with little puppy already and I have never even met her! But thats a bit extreme, haha. I hate it, everytime I see one of my posts I am forced to look at her picture, I WANT HER NOWWWWWWWWWW!!!
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Old 07-21-2006, 05:55 PM   #5  
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I'm sorry that your interview didn't go well. Here are some of my ideas:

Get a pedicure! I got my first one recently and now I'm addicted. Every time I look at my perfectly polished toes, I feel happy. My pedicure has lasted almost three weeks. And it's sandal weather, perfect for showing off those toes.

I also like the movie idea; this would definitely be at the top of my list. If you can't go to a movie because of your son, rent one. Heck rent a couple and watch one tomorrow to.

Call (or do something with) a friend that can commiserate (or who will take your mind off it).

Have your favorite meal that fits into your diet for dinner.

Pamper yourself. Stop at the drugstore and buy some luxurious bath products and some light reading (maybe some fashion mags), light some scented candles in the bathroom, and take a long bath.

I might also send an email to the person who interviewed me, thanking them for the interview (it's a good idea to do this after any interview) and addressing the issue. I'd say something like, "During our interview, I got the feeling that you are concerned that I am too extroverted for this position. I want you to know that I appreciate your concern and I wanted to take a moment to tell you why I think that, despite this, I am a good fit for the position..." Then talk about how you'll adjust your extroverted behavior to fit the position, AND/OR how you think your extroversion will actually benefit you in the position, AND/OR how you plan to deal with the fact that the position might not fulfull your needs as an extroverted person (and maybe how it will fulfill other needs that you have).

Also, I know that when I have interviewed people, I have sometimes talked with them about the challenges that I think they'll have to deal with or even why the job might be difficult for them. It doesn't necessarily mean that I'm not considering them for the job however. In fact, it means the opposite: I don't need to have this conversation with people I'm not considering hiring. I'm just putting that info out there so that if it is a problem for them, they are aware of it and can choose not to take the job. I want to make sure they've considered some of the unpleasant parts of the job and are prepared for them. The last thing I want is to hire someone, have the job be something other than what they thought, and then have them quit right away. I would especially do this if I were interviewing someone that I had a personal relationship with (such as a mentor-type relationship), because I wouldn't want jeopardize our relationship by having them later feel like I had mislead them about the job. It's possible that your mentor was just doing the same thing.

- Barbara
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Old 07-21-2006, 05:59 PM   #6  
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Have a you night, take a hot bath, take time to deep condition your hair, do your nails etc...Might be a nice change.
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Old 07-21-2006, 06:20 PM   #7  
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My favorite treat-trashy novel, warm bath, nice music, candle, cold mineral water wita slice of lemon. I watch a movie with the kids or play a game with them first so I can even count "quality time" and feel no guilt
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Old 07-21-2006, 06:26 PM   #8  
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I might be in the same boat with you and I didn't handle it well. Fiance and I were suppose to be celebrating something wonderful and now we realized that not only is our wonderful thing not happening but the situation we are already in is going to be extended indefinately! And it's not in any way our fault. We're stuck in a horrible loop hole....So, the cake and wine that I bought to celebrate with was eaten (the cake that is) more out of depression and anger than the 1 piece we were going to celebrate with before shipping hte cake off to a friend's house.

Please take it from me - I feel horrible right now! Don't binge tonight!!!! Think about how wonderful you'll feel when you wake up tomorrow and didn't need ot binge to get through tonight! You're going to feel so proud of yourself - and rightfully so!! Eating crap will just make you feel like CRAP! Be good to yourself and let others be good to you - but that includes not eating crappy food!

(I hope that helped - I should've done the same!)
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Old 07-21-2006, 06:48 PM   #9  
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Im with everyone else who said to pamper yourself!
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Old 07-21-2006, 09:14 PM   #10  
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I would go to the bookstore and buy a new book, walk around the mall for awhile, go to the card store and read funny greeting cards, get my car washed and the oil changed. By the time you get back, you'll forget all about the bad stuff.
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Old 07-21-2006, 10:35 PM   #11  
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I put music in the cd player and turn it up as loud as I can and run the tredmill hard. After I am done the music has cheered me up and the tredmill has made me to tired to be angry...
If for any reason I can't turn up the music and I am already to tired to run I watch my favorite movie.
Anything to get my mind off what I am upset about.
I am sorry about your job!
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Old 07-22-2006, 07:37 AM   #12  
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I rent Battlestar Galactica from Netflix and watch all the episodes.
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Old 07-22-2006, 07:46 AM   #13  
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Sorry things didn't go well, Phantastica.

I exercise... run... bike...or walk furiously to let out the stress and then follow it through with a home spa. Facial, bubble bath, exfoliation, etc etc.
Then a warm soft bed with a wonderful book.

Deep breaths.
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Old 07-23-2006, 12:32 PM   #14  
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Thank you all for your advice! There are some great ideas on here. I ended up coming home, cooking a healthy dinner, and going to bed early. I just wanted the day to be over. The next day, however, I took a looooong walk with my iPod to the library, sat in the cool library air and read some, and walked home.
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Old 07-23-2006, 04:47 PM   #15  
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That sounds like a healthy plan!
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