Great advice here ladies. I was going to say something along the lines of what WaterRat said. There is a silent 'enemy' if you will, and that is your subconscience. You have conditioned yourself to fail because you believe the negative talk (spoken by you) and it's probably ingrained in your brain by now. Reptition is powerful. Advertisement agencies use repetition as a tactic to get you to buy something or believe something. You can change how you're 'wired' by doing the following:
Make a list of things you want to achieve but write it in the sense that you've already achieved it. Your mind responds to the present and if you think you
are, then you
will be. I know it sounds like you're lieing to yourself but this is just to get you rewired and undo years of negative thoughts and behavior.
So, you make a list and read it every day, a couple of times a day. I know it sounds kooky but believe me it works. I've been doing this faithfully for 2 months and my outlook is completely different and I've got a determination that WILL NOT be broken.
A sample list could read:
I am leaner than when I started.
I am closer to my short term goal.
I have more energy than yesterday.
I am getting my youthful shape back.
You get the idea. Read it every day.
As far as the vending machines, bring fruits which has natural sugar. I bring a banana and an orange. I too work swing shifts so I prepared all my meals for the weak one day and then I have it. If you binge, it's usually due to a lack of preparation. Have your meals prepared - very important.