I have finally decided to really do something, and take care of myself. My boyfriend of two years had open-heart surgery and is doing cardio rehab, so we're joining the wellness center as a couple. I'm relieved to have someone to exercise with, but I'm terrified to be weighed in front of him! I am morbidly obese and the regular scale just won't work. I'll have to be weighed on the "special" scale (if they even have one). I feel like he's going to be really disgusted to know the actual number. Ugh...

I doubt that he loves you because of a number and I doubt that he'll stop loving you because of a number.

I didn't weigh myself when I started because I was scared to know just how heavy I got at my highest. Now I'm aggravated at myself because I don't really know how much I lost!

Definitely weigh yourself, do measurements and take some before pictures. As you start to lose, you will find that benchmark completely inspiring. If you don't want to be weighed in front of your boyfriend, ask him to wait outside the room.

Just tell him your not comfortable being weighed in front of him and ask him to turn away, or else have him leave a few minutes before you so you can weigh yourself in private - the important thing is to weigh yourself regularly so you can see your progress. Good to hear you have a workout partner, and hope to see some more of you on here (or over at successes?!) And congratulations on deciding to start this journey - you'll find a lot of support here.

I don't know why, but I've never, ever, had a desire to hide my weight from anyone. Your boyfriend knows you're very overweight, so what will a number do? Tell him that you're very overweight? He loves you, weight or not. It doesn't matter what those made-up numbers on the scale say. Weigh and measure yourself, that's the best way to track your transformation into a healthy lifestyle!

I understand! I was forced to get weighed when I went to a doctor and was horrified! My highest ever! It IS embarrassing when you weigh that much! I wish I had measurements from before but it is hard taking them on myself. BUT I did that this week and already was surprised at how much I lost; and I can TELL by my clothes that I have already lost bunches of inches! So I would agree that it is a good idea to do it. Even if no one but YOU ever knows what they are (and the trainer of course) I would encourage you to do it so when things start to fall off you will know how far you have come.

I think Sierra is right... your boyfriend should understand he will probably even be very proud of you for doing this. And LOL I am sure he already knows you weigh a lot so he is not going to be that "disgusted" by it!! If he wanted a skinny little thing for a girlfriend, he would probably have one LOL; but he wants YOU.

It's really hard to confront that number, it kinda brings it all home. I'd take a tissue with you just in case. I know that I cried and cried when I weighed in for the first time in 10 years in January 05. I already knew what I weighed, bizarrely. I knew I was 120 kilograms (267 pounds) and I jumped on the scales (I was actually 119) and just cried.

Your boyfriend loves you for you. He already knows how big (and beautiful) you are, and doesn't need a number to tell him. I'm betting he puts his arms around you and pledges his support to get you where you need to be.

You will do this. And we'll be here to help.

I hear you, to me my weight is such a private thing which is probably why I was overweight in the first place. I was terrified to tell my husband at christmas that I weighed as much as he did, and he like me couldnt believe that was my weight..because I "didnt look 304lbs" as many of us know that number creeps up on you. But please dont let it discourage you, because I found it was like a weight being lifted when I was honest with myself and someone I love about my weight and said it out loud. So now with every pound that I lose my new number is something to be shouted from the rooftops be proud of your success. I also think taking measurements is an excellent idea..I didnt and I regret it. Best of luck

Yes it is so hard to confront our weight when it is so high! I still don't tell anyone and surprised myself by being able to post it on 3FC. But when there are so many other people "in my same boat" it makes it easier and this is the place where no one is going to put you down or think less of you for it.

I want to thank you all for your replies. It's nice to know that I am not "alone" in all this. I made the orientation appointment this morning for this coming Friday. I feel almost sick thinking about it, but I have resolved not to back out, or suddenly not feel well enough to go. I'm going to do it. I owe this to myself, and I know that! (But it's still scary as all get out...)

I was also very afraid to let my husband know my actual weight. When I went to my doctor 9 months ago, he was very upfront with me about my need to lose weight and told my weight in front of my husband. I cried, but I got over it and started losing the weight. I am tall and had always told my husband that I weighed 185 and he was kind enough to act like he believed me. Now he knows I weighed 234 and he has been tremendously supportive of my weight loss journey. It seems to me that once my true weight was out in the open, it gave me incentive to do something about it. Good luck and I know you can find success too.

Think of it this way... You may weigh XXX pounds right now, but today is the last day you'll ever weigh that much! I know it's a tender subject and you might not feel comfortable letting your boyfriend see, but for me anyway, it helped me to be honest with myself and my friends. It sort of broke down all the little invisible walls I'd built for myself and i had nowhere to go but up! (or, down, in pounds, anyway! )

Good luck. You will go through with it, and you'll be on your road to recovery then. Come back and let us all know how it goes, ok?

I agree that you should ask him to not look. I am embarrased about my weight and won't tell my immediate family. I won't even weigh when my kids are in the room because I don't want them too see and tell others.

Good luck! Just remember that we are all in this together and we are here to support and help you!