Angry with Myself

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  • I've been slacking since before the holidays, and not doing what I need to do to lose the weight I want to lose. I made it down to 199 a couple of weeks ago, and now it's starting to creep back up (204 this morning). I'm annoyed and angry that I haven't been making this a priority. I want to lose the weight, but I just get lazy and stressed and start eating in ways I know won't help, and not doing what I need to do to lose it.

    So I'm re-committing. Unfortunately, I decided to recommit AFTER breakfast, but oh well. My goals are to stay between 1200 and 1700 cal per day (hopefully averaging around 1500 daily for the week) and get at least some exercise in, even if it's just walking a mile or two a day. The exercise is a little bit of a challenge because I'm working full time and starting a part-time job (so my weeks are going to look like 70-75 hour work weeks for a while, until I get moved and my car paid down), but I'm going to count walking to work and home as exercise (about 3 miles a day).

    I re-started a fitday account. If it goes in my mouth, I'm logging it. I'm going to drink my water and cut out the diet soda completely -- I had gotten down to 1 can every couple of days, and now I'm back up to drinking 3-4 cans a day within a month or so time. And honestly, the more I drink of it, the more my other habits seems to fly out the window. I know for sure that I'm not drinking the water I need to when I'm drinking diet soda.

    I can do this. I know I can. I'm just angry with myself that I haven't been -- three months down the drain for no good reason. Well, it's time to get it together again, and start taking care of myself. No one else can do it for me.
  • You've made some good choices. Rejoining and getting back on track before too much weight gain happens is something you should be proud of! Set your goals small, and obtainable, and that will help you to keep motivated.

    I've set up a challenge (on several forums including "challenge" and the low carb forum) for setting very small goals 4 pounds, then 3 then 3 more (4/3/3 challenge) so that I am never very far from a "success". When the whole cycle of 4/3/3 is finished I'll be ten pounds smaller than when I started, but I don't look at it as ten pounds at a time, I focus only on the first 4 pounds. When that is obtained I refocus on the next small goal.

    Anyone can lose little tiny bits of weight like four or three pounds can't they? For me, looking at the big picture is too much. It de-motivates me. Focusing my whole attention on losing those tiny amounts of weight helps me get there a baby step at a time.

    Would you like to join me and the others who are seeking to look at it this way?

    Do you find it hard or complicated to count calories? I find that I don't do anything that gets too complicated. So what I've been doing is eating low carb. I don't have to record anything, I just avoid certain foods. What it winds up meaning is that I eat mostly meats (protein foods) and vegetables (particularly green veggys). I avoid starches and sugars. Because it is simple, doesn't involve recording things or weighing and measuring, it works well for me, or at least it has been for sometime now.

    Low carb is a fantastic way to lose weight. When I first tried it in 2000 I was amazed at how well it worked, I had tried before to "eat less" and to count calories, and none of those methods worked well for me. One thing I found that I loved about low carb is that I never had to be hungry. I never had to have a time when I was needing something to eat, but felt that I couldn't eat because I had used up my "calories" or "points" for the day. I never had ravenous blood sugar spikes or low sugar moments either which kind of amazed me.

    I was so completly overwhelmed by how well my low carb diet worked, that I couldn't for the life of me understand why someone hadn't told me before how easy it was to lose weight this way! I felt like I had found a miracle that worked when nothing before had worked for more than a day or two.

    And the interesting thing I discovered, was that always before I had felt like I didn't eat "that much" I just ate the wrong foods (junk sweets etc). When I started low carb, I began to realize how really TRUE that belief had been. Once I was eating the right foods the fat seemed to melt off.

    Anyway if you are ready for a change, if you haven't tried low carb before, you might consider it. I know it isn't for everyone, but it is really effective and I can't stop telling people about it because it works so well and so easily.
  • Quote: I've been slacking since before the holidays, and not doing what I need to do to lose the weight I want to lose. I made it down to 199 a couple of weeks ago, and now it's starting to creep back up (204 this morning). I'm annoyed and angry that I haven't been making this a priority. I want to lose the weight, but I just get lazy and stressed and start eating in ways I know won't help, and not doing what I need to do to lose it.

    Believe me I know the feeling.

    So I'm re-committing. Unfortunately, I decided to recommit AFTER breakfast, but oh well.

    Better then , than later.

    My goals are to stay between 1200 and 1700 cal per day (hopefully averaging around 1500 daily for the week) and get at least some exercise in, even if it's just walking a mile or two a day. The exercise is a little bit of a challenge because I'm working full time and starting a part-time job (so my weeks are going to look like 70-75 hour work weeks for a while, until I get moved and my car paid down), but I'm going to count walking to work and home as exercise (about 3 miles a day). Any kind of walking counts. Walking is awesome though. I believe you got to enjoy it though. Is walking from work and home stressful?

    I re-started a fitday account. If it goes in my mouth, I'm logging it. I'm going to drink my water and cut out the diet soda completely -- I had gotten down to 1 can every couple of days, and now I'm back up to drinking 3-4 cans a day within a month or so time. And honestly, the more I drink of it, the more my other habits seems to fly out the window. I know for sure that I'm not drinking the water I need to when I'm drinking diet soda.

    I can do this. I know I can. I'm just angry with myself that I haven't been -- three months down the drain for no good reason. Well, it's time to get it together again, and start taking care of myself. No one else can do it for me.
    Yea I through three months down the drain myself in a very reckless way. I got pretty upset before Jan came and got back on the wagon .
    Again I know the feeling. Great thing is we aren't giving up!

    what knocked me down last time will just only make me stronger this time.
  • Good luck on your re-starting your plan.. You can do it.
  • Don't do what I did! I got down into the 170s and yo-yoed up to 217! Here I am now down to 205 again and so irritated I'm retreading over old territory. It makes every lb. less exciting to lose because I had already lost it! So be angry with yourself and use the anger to motivate yourself to begin. Then forgive yourself and move on. But don't keep going up. It's SO not worth it!

    Karma
  • Me too!!! I am angry with myself......I have TOM, (anyone want him next? ) and I have been snacking!! I don't know whats going on. ....yesterday I was bored and snacking too much....so I went to Kohl's for their 80% off clearance. I found some ADORABLE skirts and tops ranging from $2.00 -$5.00. I had a blast trying on some 14's !!! woohooo..... can't believe it anyways, I came home and promptly had a candy bar. Old habits die hard....I guess I thought that I had 'earned' it somehow. Now that made me mad.!!! I journaled it but it really pissed me off. I had gone to the gym and worked damn hard on the treadmill for a 760 calorie burn just to throw it away with a 300 calorie choc. bar!!! TOTAL WASTE OF TIME AND EFFORT!!! I still evened out with 1547 calories for the day, but?? TODAY IS A NEW DAY....and I'm feeling better. Just moving on to a better frame of mind. Sometimes I can justify almost anything. Today I'm wearing a really nice sweater that I'm embarrassed to say I've never even worn. I bought it about 5 years ago.....and it never fit...BUT IT DOES NOW!!! So thats my reminder today to eat OP and to think positive thoughts. We can all just turn that downward spiral around.....THINK GOOD THOUGHTS AND TAKE SMALL BABY STEPS!!!
    __________________
  • Those three months didn't go down the drain as long as you learned something from them. And you obviously did so there is no reason to be angry with yourself. Just take what you've learned and apply it to your life and that scale will be moving in the right direction in no time.
  • Congratulations on re-commiting yourself! I know that gaining a bit happens from time to time, but it is important and praise-worthy that you are trying again.
    When I got to the coveted 199 mark, I know that I could not sleep until I was safely below that number--- for good and forever! So I know how you must feel......so close and yet so far. But don't worry, you will be back to that number and lower in no time at all!!
  • Hang in there. I too am just starting today myself. Coming here is one of the first steps in a long walk, and I know you can do it. I know I can do it too.

    I think the fact that you are re-committing yourself to this is just awesome!
  • Quote: Don't do what I did! I got down into the 170s and yo-yoed up to 217! Here I am now down to 205 again and so irritated I'm retreading over old territory. It makes every lb. less exciting to lose because I had already lost it! So be angry with yourself and use the anger to motivate yourself to begin. Then forgive yourself and move on. But don't keep going up. It's SO not worth it!

    Karma
    Yoyonomore is so right!! Like her I was at 258 and I had lost all the way to 178 and yo yo back up to 238 my head was spinning so darn bad I didn't know how to set up my starting weight on here!! It seem to be so unfair to say from 258 even though that has been my highest weight that I ever been but from that weight I had lost to 178 and screw myself up. boy was I mad.. I shook my head at the end of dec and thought to myself well I didn't gain it all back, get back on the wagon, you know what you want!!
  • Thanks everyone -- I'm back on track, though it felt rough last night. It amazes me how easy it is to slip back into old bad habits! I'm doing better today though, and I really think my part-time job will help too, because I won't be sitting home wanting to munch through the night.

    I did discover that drinking diet iced tea isn't such a great substitute for diet soda though -- I figured it had less caffeine, but it goes down so much easier, I've been through three 16oz bottles in addition to two 16 oz bottles of water. Yikes! No wonder I feel like I'm bouncing today! Can we say too much?
  • I can totally relate. You caught yourself early though (5lbs isn't terrible) I went from 278 to 202 and lost it. I got back to 253. Last week I recommitted as well (with the help of 3FC) and now I am 249 (never again to cross the 250 line)

    Keep up the amazing work!
  • Just wanted to give a quick update -- part of the weight I was holding on to MUST have been water weight, because I'm back down to 198 as of this morning, and I haven't been doing anything really spectacular. I have been eating around 1700 cals / day, and walking a bit. I've also been sick, so I don't know if maybe the fever helped burn down some poundage or what. But I'm happy to be back under 200 again.
  • That sounds much better! You sound more optimistic and ready to roll!
  • I’ve been stressing out also. Apparently I’ve gain a couple of pounds after the superball weekend. I guess I am not going to make my goal weight before April. But then I rethought the whole thing. I am not really in a hurry because this is a lifestyle change for me. As long as I change lifestyle successfully the weight will eventually fall off sooner or later. Now I just have to say it three more times.