Dang! Awesome Thread
 

I really needed this thread today.. I'm feeling frustrated as I have hit a flatline on my scales for the last two weeks.. I have been doing good for over 6 weeks now and have lost 18 lbs.. but.. the scales haven't budged for two weeks now and I am starting to feel the same way I have with every other diet I have been on.. Now.. so the control is my hands.. do I feel sorry for myself and drop this like so many other diets I've dropped .. blame genetics etc.. or do I look at myself.. Have I been drinking enough water? probably not.. have I been excersizing consistantly? No.. Have I been careful with my portions and not lying to myself about how much I am really eating?? Maybe it's time to get a kitchen scale.. The point is I have done the same thing for years and to make a change I have to realize that weather I stay fat or get fit is up to know one but me and I have to love myself enough to do this. There is so much wisdom in this thread.. I'm printing it out as I type this to reread. Thanks to all...

hey I just wanted to also chime in here and say how awsome this post is....I was reading everyone's response and thinking "i've have never done that blah blah blah" and then I think I heard that little voice...the little voice that told me that it wasn't "just water weight" or that maybe i should put down the bag of jelly beans and and eat an apple....the same little voice reminded me that I lied to myself for a long time.....every morning I would step on the scale and when it would read 149 (my highest weight) i would say OK i am NOT eating today...then proceed to cry ..instead of actually going out and DOING something about it!!...I turned a blind eye to it...and just saw curves......its so easy to fall into that trap when you are with someone who loves you for you..and wont say..Hey honey you are getting a fat ***...hahah cause if he did you would punch him in the face..but you understand what I am saying....finally i decided that it was time to eat healthy ..that i was an adult and it was My responsiblitly to take care of ME...so I started working out every am and did South Beach....I finally lost those 9 pounds and I am not looking back....I am doing this FOR ME and for the first time I am being honest with myself...it was time to change....

thank you for that post....it really opend my eyes up

I'll just add another vote for "great post" . . . Thank you. I have learned not to cheat myself in most ways, but I still let little lies slip through. The biggest problem I have is with taking my measurements. I will pull the measuring tape much tighter than it should be to get that measurement down another half inch! I feel like if my measurement is the same as the previous couple times, I've somehow failed. But I know as long as I still see long-term improvement, I'm doing good.

All your posts have been really great and insightful. You should totally write a book about this stuff -- I'd buy it.

FerretNose - thank you so much for that link! OMG! Finally some answers!
You know, I have always thought myself a strange person. :lol: Back when I was in school, I was an overachiever. I had to be the best at everything. I was a straight A student, the president of every club, involved in everything - I was a goody goody. And I got made fun of for that constantly. I wasn't itty bitty - but looking back at pictures now - I really was in good shape. But I still thought I was fat. I still thought no matter what I did, that it wasn't good enough. Then I went to college. There, I became the total opposite of who I was before. I never went to class. I failed almost every class. (Before that I had never made an F in my life!!) I started drinking, smoking and doing some drugs. And gettting fatter....and fatter....and fatter. I just quit. Just quit trying. Now I can't seem to get back to the "goody goody Lauren" - or at least a happy medium. I feel like I waste space on the planet. I feel like I am using oxygen to breathe that someone else who is more beneficial to life could use. If I do try ANYTHING - I never see it through to my goal. I always quit. I have felt like such a faliure for sooooo long.... and I can't figure out how to change. "Just do it!!" my loved ones tell me. "Just change!" and I look at them blankly. "Huh? How do I do that?" To them, it seems so easy...to me - impossible.
Another realization......have any of you noticed that if you are overweight, you tend to surround yourself with other overweight people? I was talking to a girlfriend last night and she was talking about how she couldn't wait to get home and eat this piece of cake in the fridge, and how she sure needed to go to the gym but would probably "just sit at home on my fatass and do nothing!" And I thought to myself "Lauren. This is not what you need to hear. Why are you surrounded with people with this mentality?" But I do love her and she is my friend - so what do you do? Does anyone else notice that they do this also?
I haven't weighed this week - scared to after this weekend. I really do think I am wasting your time here. I don't seem to be really doing anything about losing weight. Just talking. Talky talky talky.....like I always do......

hey Lauren- sometimes the talky talky ends up being the way we figure things out. You're not wasting anyone's time, not even your own time, because you are seeking answers. As long as you keep looking, you're not wasing time. I surrounded myself with fat friends even when I had a great figure. They also tended to have low self esteems. Hmmm... you're also not the only one who overacheived in the early years and screwed around with the college years! You don't realize that you are still a perfectionist- just a negative type one. You want it all or nothing deep down, but we don't get anywhere with all or nothing. "Impotent Perfectionists" hate to take baby steps because anything less than the end result (what they see as perfection) is somehow unacceptable to them. They'd rather not try. That's the part you have to get over, and the first step to that is to slow down and see what your next step is. Then take that step. Then evealuate the second one. And so on. Keep goin! It's so easy for other people to say "why don't you do so and so" but they don't realize that you dropped your tools somewhere down the road. You gotta backtrack and go find them.

Well, FerretNose, I posted a reply but it disappeared! I don't understand! :?: It literally just disappeared! I don't have time to re-write it right now, but I will tomorrow! Thanks and I'm sorry! I don't know what happened?! :?: :?: :?:

Thanks Quite-a-handfull...you really started the ball rolling. All of you are offering great insite. Don't think I can add much except to say Been there done that. It's been a slow process but at 54 I know how I sabotaged myself and I am not doing it anymore. I deserve better and SO DO ALL OF YOU. Treat yourself with the respect and kindness that you deserve. Your all worth it! Cindi

I love this post. It is a real eye opener. I know it is an old one but I felt it was worthy of being brought back to life.

I agree, this is a great post. I defiantly could have written it myself...you know if i were a writer.

I used to lie all the time and say I was on a diet, after awhile even I believed it and the I would be so frustrated when I didn't lose a pound. Well no kidding I didn't lose any weight I wasn't doing any work.

I hear ya. I was 330 pounds and would make myself believe I wasn't "that big". That I was "normal". Frightening now looking back on it, really.

I was actually pretty honest with myself about not trying - the only lying I did was telling myself I didn't care. But boy do I see this in people in my life. This is what I think most of the time, too, when people say they are doing everything "right" and gaining weight. I know there have to be exceptions to the rule, but personal honesty is a real problem for some.

Seeing old posts like this does make me a bit sad when the original poster is no longer around. It makes me wonder if they ever conquered their food demons, are they still struggling, did they gain more, what would their life had been like over the last several years if they had beaten the weight problem. I hope for the best, but given the odds of this pursuit, the chances are not good...

For some reason, until I read this thread, I didn't realize that I've been doing the same thing, switching techniques, for many years. No wonder I haven't made any progress.

This is an excellent thread.