WL and inner resistence

  • Hi all, I have attempted to lose weight for years on and off. Yet each plan I attempted, I kept making it more difficult for myself to lose what I wanted in a timely manner. I kept fighting myself. I kept resisting my own plan, and wanted, and did, eat more than I was allowed. When I would serve myself something, I would just HAVE to give myself just a bit more because it wasnt 'enough'. I was resisting actually eating less on a deep level when in my mind I wanted to lose weight. And when I ate more, I did not lose at the rate I would have liked.

    In the good book Thin for Life, by Fletcher, she describes how people who have finally lost weight and kept it off had felt something different the last time they lost. A click or lightbulb moment. I didnt feel a click, but there has been a real mental shift in my effort this time. For the first time ever in a WL effort, I actually WANT to eat less. I do not add just that smidge more here and there. I dont want to. I want to eat less, and I dont resent it. It sounds silly, but I no longer feel as if I am fighting myself. I am no longer in the midst of a mental battle ground at meal serving time. I serve myself what I should, even on the smaller size. Even when cooking, I add smaller amounts of certain things. And I no longer feel that deep old inner resistence to eating less that had been my constant opponent.

    I knew this resistence was always within me, and even understood the source of it, but couldnt stop it. I always felt as if someone was trying to take necessary food away from me, and that it was a problem in my efforts, but I could never put this resistence aside. Then it was just gone one day. I have no idea why or how it went, if I knew, I would tell you. I am very happy about it however. I am trying to re-inforce it with the affirmation "I want to eat less" and have posted that on my frig, and repeat it often each day. I really do want to eat less. For the first time ever I feel I am on the same page as my subconscious. We both want me to eat less.

    Jan