Candace: The hugging issue has been addressed and I agree with all the great advice given.

Back to the attention you're getting from the opposite sex...I totally understand where you're coming from.

I started getting a lot more attention once I lost some weight. Men would come up and talk to me at the gym, out at clubs, asking for my number and at first I would completely freeze and not know what to do at all! I would get a compliment, turn bright red, mumble something and walk away. Haha, I've gotten better in my reactions but it threw me for a loop...big time.

I've definitely gotten more used to it but it takes time!

Well, if it were me, since you're not interested in him; I would say "Oh, please forgive me, my boyfriend is not comfortable with me hugging other men. I do not need any trouble with my man. How you been doing?"

There is absolutely nothing rude about refusing to allow strangers to embrace you or press their bodies against yours! He is the rude and offensive one here. Not you!

If it were me, I wouldn't hide from the store, but go right on back there. If he attempted a hug, I'd put my hands up, "Stop In The Name Of Love" style and say a firm, "No more hugs." If he protested, I'd repeat the line and walk away.

That's not rude! It's a proper response to an extremely rude request.

And if he brought it up one more time, I'd speak to management in the store. If you're getting any kind of creepy vibe, you might just want to call the managers, anyway.

He shouldn't be asking women for hugs. That's not normal or okay.

You need to start practicing saying "No" and this may be as good a time as any.

But if you feel weird, like he might be dangerous, maybe it's best to follow your instincts and avoid him. Next time, though, tell a guy No. You'll get good at it. :)

This!!!!!! We have a fundamental 'right' to our boundaries. Trust your instincts! :And way to go, btw! :)

I'm going to comment on the the cloak of invisibility more than the creepy man (although I do find the situation creepy, but I'm not a hugger).

I had a huge problem losing that cloak of invisibility. I definitely used it as crutch. The first time I lost weight and the attention came, I couldn't handle it. I have always been one that was super confident in my merits intellectually and I find that to be more important than my looks (although side note, I do wear "fashionable" clothes and love make up. But books over looks is a favorite for me). Anyway when the attention started coming from men just because I was "on the menu" size, it really irked me. I didn't want to go back to being invisible but it brought up some major issues of "why wasn't I enough before. I am witty and smart, why does me being thinner make me more attractive." It didn't help that I had never had a boyfriend before and I got my first boyfriend when I lost the weight. It was a major blow to my confidence of what I think are the more important aspects of myself. Needless to say being uncomfortable with the attention and feeling like my worth was being looked over because of my looks made it very easy for me to be OK with gaining the weight back ... plus some.

This time around I am losing weight for the same reason as before - health and because I really really love working out. I am a big fan of athleticism. I have gotten close to the size I was when the attention came before, but I've learned a few things over the years that are helping me this time around. The attention is coming but I am trying to remember that people may start talking to you for your looks but they'll stick around for your personality. And that even though I may get hit on more because I am becoming what society has ingrained in us to find more attractive, that it has nothing to do my self worth as a person. Even if they are hitting on your for the outer, it's still the inner that matters.

I don't know if that's what you meant by cloak of invisibility, but those are the words I used when talking about the above topic with my friends. Feeling uncomfortable from all the attention will probably always be a bit of a struggle, at least for me. I am polite to the men that talk to me, I let my awkwardness and intellect shine through and if they still talk to me then good, if they stop because they don't like it then good. You don't have to change who you are as a person just because you weight changes, that's what it boils down to. Hope that wasn't too far off of what you meant....