Eating out dilemma
 

This is a funny one for me.

I normally make exceptions to my diet if I am eating out socially or at a great restaurant. So last week, I had a picnic with friends. The week before I ate with friends at a great restaurant.

But this week I am being offered to go to an OK restaurant with a few work colleagues for which work will pick up the tab. I don't have to go - there is no pressure. It is very informal. The food is good. But I am not sure if the splurge is worth the gain.

I am thinking of skipping it.

This sort of decision would normally be a no-brainer for me. A yes or a no.

But I am really on the ropes with this one.
:dizzy:
What to do?

Nothing on the menu that fits in with your diet? I can usually find something healthy and worth the calories enough at mostly any restaurant, but then again I do really enjoy going out to eat with coworkers or friends just for the social aspect/experience of it so it's worth it to me. I'd say if there's nothing on the menu you think will be worth it and it's not compelling enough for you to go, just skip it!

In these situations I always ask myself if my incipient eating disorder is talking to me, or if there's really something about the outing that simply doesn't interest me, such that a "normal" person without my preoccupations might skip it.

Which may or may mot help you. But it's what I have to make myself do.

I'm a total foodie and if the menu is "mehhhhh" and you're otherwise not interested in the outing then I would pass. If you think that the outing will be a good experience socially you'll find something that won't ruin your hard work.

It feels a little like you're missing the point. Based on your posts, you're not really on a "diet" - this your new life. So why is this decision about the food? Take the meal out of the equation. Do you want to go? Are there career and/or social advantages of going/not going? Make that decision and then figure out your eating strategy if you decide to go. Look to see what you can eat from the menu, or plan to eat before and get an appetizer or something small.

If I were you I would make this decision based solely on the social aspect. Would you rather eat a meal with these people it would you rather eat alone? If you decide to go you will definitely be able to find something on the menu that suits you.

I always err on the side of socializing. It's good for the soul.

You can go to this outing without eating a meal. Get yourself a drink if you want one and say you have other plans for dinner. No worries about eating mediocre restaurant food and yet you still get the social/career benefit of going.

Unless you really don't want to go :)

Unless you're an introvert. Then it's just bad for the soul.

Thanks for all the great advice. There were some real nuggets in your posts.

I have decided not to go.

I am on a nice little losing streak at the moment and I would just blow it if I had lunch there.

Not necessarily. Being introverted doesn't mean one doesn't socialize. I think the concept of being introverted vs. extroverted is more complex than wanting to be around people or not. I know lots of people in leadership positions that are introverts. I consider myself an introvert although my job has me in a leadership position, on stage in front of lots of people all the time. I do draw energy from social situations.

When I "diet", my social life suffers. I usually withdraw from all social events that include food. -- My relationship with food is kinda all or nothing... Once I start eating, I can't stop. So one big meal out, brings out cravings like crazy and I usually fall off the wagon at that point. So, I totally understand your choice of not going.

Year ago, I was doing really well with my weight loss; I had been mindful for 5 or so moths, and lost nearly 30 pounds; my friends started complaining because I was not attending our monthly luncheons or happy hours... They felt I was pulling away from them, and questioned if I was mad at them etc. I tried explaining, but I don't know how many actually understood where I was coming from; many took it as a personal attack; that I was purposely avoiding them. But one friend was so sweet; she started making dates with me during my daily walks. She would join and we would spend an hour walking and chatting.

But you are right, a so-so meal is not worth the calories.

Did you go?

Nope. And I am sitting pretty at 171.4lbs!

It was a tough call. But like anything in life, there are costs and benefits.

:) I just had to know how this story was going to end

I had to reply, because I am often faced with this dilemma as well. Not all places have diet friendly menus. I know a trick though! My go to order when I am eating out is...

A burger, NO bun, with a side salad! It tastes great, and is also diet friendly and guilt free. Try it sometime.