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Old 05-23-2014, 10:01 PM   #16  
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Originally Posted by katerina11 View Post
on oprah: i bet if you fed those words back to her, she would be embarrassed and say she was wrong. because she's older, too, now. thank gawd!
Yes, probably, but she has some other hangups - like I also remember her saying how she put toilet paper in the toilet before peeing so people couldn't hear her pee... So... she has her hang-ups too because... SHE'S HUMAN!


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i always feel better about myself when i am out there exercising. i derive so much satisfaction and general well being from it. when i am not on the right track in that way, i start feeling super crappy about myself. i can be the same exact weight, and my mindset will be completely different.
And this is definitely true for me. I feel thinner, shapelier, prettier, happier when I'm exercising. Even a day or two OFF from that and I feel like a big, fat, frumpy blob.
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Old 05-24-2014, 09:22 AM   #17  
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You look amazing thanks for sharing! I bet that in 10yrs you'll be looking at those pictures and find all of them beautiful. Hindsight has a way of making us appreciate ourselves in a way that is hard to do in the present.

I think women are taught to hate their bodies through the media. It's also a social norm to degrade ourselves as women. We're taught to scrutinize ourselves by our mothers and friends. When we hear someone say they think they look fat we immediately empathize and say "me too, I'm soooo bloated" when we really should take action and stop the self degredation. Seriously, why are we constantly apologizing for our appearance and why don't we stand up for ourselves and each other?

If you haven't already, I strongly suggest you watch the documentary MissRepresentation - I think it's available on youtube for $1. It's a very powerful message of how the media has manipulated women into feeling unworthy and insecure, it even traces the political drive to subjugate women in the 50's! Watching it has made me into a different person, from rejecting television that pits women against each other to making a concerted effort to engage in a conversation with little girls that does not involve how cute they are.
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Old 05-24-2014, 09:55 AM   #18  
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Kudos to you for being both honest and inspiring!

You truly do look fabulous given how much you have lost and your young-at-heart age (I'm older than you).

I wish we could rid the world of all airbrushed and edited images of all people. It's so sad that many of us have issues with wearing shorts or sleeveless tops or gulp, a bathing suit

I am going to make my move to be more real and wear a short sleeved top while out and about today which is something I haven't done in many years.

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Old 05-24-2014, 10:15 AM   #19  
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I found this on tumblr and thought I'd share it here, if you don't mind...

“You gotta stop lying to us. We can tell you’re lying to us. Stop telling me, “Well… someone one day will think that crooked nose is just cute as a button,” I don’t want to hear that. I don’t want to hear the only thing that you can reassure me with is based on what I look like.
Stay beautiful. Stay beautiful. Staying beautiful is why I’ve got shaky hands and no metabolism. Staying beautiful is why I keep crying myself to sleep. Staying beautiful to me meant staying empty. I’m sick of it. I’m sick of people who’ve never seen me telling me, “Don’t worry, you’re somebody’s wet dream.” I don’t want to be. I don’t want to be beautiful. I don’t want to be pretty.

Stop telling girls they’ve just got to love themselves because “Everybody is beautiful.” You say the word “beautiful” and we think of magazines. Beauty exists in each person but it’s not because you’ll eventually stumble across someone who finds you attractive. Love your body because it’s flawed, love yourself for your heart. Beauty exists in you, I promise.

It’s because when you breathe in, sweetheart, you’re swallowing four million words you could have said but when you exhale, you choose the ones that are kindest. It’s because you’ve got sharp teeth and round hips and a good grasp on video games. You’re beautiful because they’ve knocked you to your knees and you keep wiping the blood out of the corners of your mouth and getting right back to your feet. You’re beautiful because they told you that you couldn’t succeed so you strapped yourself into the fastest car you could find and told them to **** off, that you were running away to somewhere their venom couldn’t pierce through your fingertips - you’re beautiful because you’ve got stories stacked up your spinal column, not because some dude one day is going to say, “Huh, I’d **** her.”

Stop preaching the same few words to us. Stop saying, “You’re beautiful,” because yes she is but she’s only going to hear, “I’m only saying this because I feel bad and I have nothing else to say.” Stop talking down to us. Instead start giving out compliments that mean something. Tell me I dress like I’m a queen. Tell her that you’re more than willing to punch somebody who asks, “But weren’t you born a boy,” tell her that you are willing to protect her. Tell her you’re happy she’s alive, not that you’re happy about how she looks.

Baby girl, look down to your hands, because these are the bones that will build and break nations - stay strong, stay wild, stay free, but don’t stay beautiful. Get ugly. Get hair in your mouth and sand in your eyes. Bite the people who hurt you, draw blood. Have sex in public restrooms, laugh about it, keep notches in your belt. Kiss the girl in your class with blue eyes you can’t stop staring at, get her lip gloss all over your collarbones. Skin your palms. Moan loudly. Stop getting quiet when obnoxious people interrupt you, talk over them, talk while staring them down, show them you don’t give a **** whether or not they like what you’re saying, you’re going to finish it. If somebody calls you a *****, wink. Be ugly. Stop tearing your sandwiches apart under the table so you can eat like a fairy. Stop trying to be dainty. Cut your hair. Pierce everything you want, tattoo the rest, roll your eyes at your parents. Don’t hide your hurt, wear it, stop thinking you’re going to inconvenience everybody. Take back this world you gave up. Make it yours. Don’t go down without screaming.

You don’t need to be beautiful. You are not somebody’s art piece. Baby girl, look down to your hands.

What’s important is that you can do anything. You have so much potential and that’s what makes you important. You are so much more than your cheekbones or the width of your thighs.

What’s beautiful is that you can make anything happen. Stop being beautiful. Get ugly.

Go be alive.”

Be alive, be glorious, be good at sex. Be so much more than just plain “beautiful.” /// r.i.d | inkskinned (via inkskinned)
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Old 05-24-2014, 11:05 AM   #20  
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Wooooooooow......yessssssssss!!! That is some TRUTH if I have never heard it. Thank you for sharing that katerina11!!!!
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Old 05-24-2014, 11:19 AM   #21  
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Berry I liked your blog post. That must of been scary to post! You looked really good at 170. You will get there again!

20 lbs in 6 weeks? That is great! Keep it up! I always like reading your post on the board here. You are down to earth and funny!

Are you doing about 1200 calories a day?

Are you exercising or no?

Last edited by Jasmine31; 05-24-2014 at 11:19 AM.
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Old 05-24-2014, 01:31 PM   #22  
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Yes, I hate how we are so harsh on ourselves because we have unrealistic expectations of what our bodies should really look like. I spent the first part of my life thinking I was an ugly duckling and I am not. It took time and being older (and wiser) to recognize that I am pretty and I have a really nice body (even with some extra weight on it).

I have friends now who love their bodies and a lot of self-confidence and through them, I started to realize that I am just as attractive and can have the same confidence. And if I don't like it, I can change it (i.e. lose weight, etc.).

I think men don't suffer through this as much; although I hate hearing that men are now being subjugated to those unrealistic standards that women were as well.

And now, I want to watch MissRepresented.... thanks for the recommendation.
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Old 05-24-2014, 07:21 PM   #23  
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Good going BBB! Just as honest & candid in your deeds as you are in your writings
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Old 05-25-2014, 10:27 AM   #24  
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I like you very much in your bikini photo, Berryblondeboys! You do have a good body. Giving birth to children and not exercising always does leave its imprints on the female body. Afterall, with the busy lifestyle of a householder, who has the time or money for working out with a personal trainer everyday or to go for tummy tucks following childbirth. Or for that matter, to be constantly reminded of weight every waking moment of the life as what would go on in the mind of a supermodel! So there are vast differences between opportunities we have as normal people vs. supermodels and thus it is natural such a difference is bound to reflect on our bodies. That said, I truly think you look very good in your bikini picture and I would encourage you to wear it on the beach once you get to be that size again. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and photos.
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Old 05-25-2014, 11:18 AM   #25  
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BBB, I love your honesty and your thought provoking posts.

As for Oprah, she is the biggest phony of them all. My hubby has seen her several times passing through JFK airport sans all the makeup and hair support, and she is unrecognizable.

I hope you come to see yourself as the amazing person that resonates through the boards.
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Old 05-25-2014, 11:31 AM   #26  
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BBB, I love your honesty and your thought provoking posts.

As for Oprah, she is the biggest phony of them all. My hubby has seen her several times passing through JFK airport sans all the makeup and hair support, and she is unrecognizable.

I hope you come to see yourself as the amazing person that resonates through the boards.
I fail to see how wearing makeup makes Oprah a phony. She appeared on her show several several numerous times without makeup, she always credited her hair stylist, makeup artist and stylist for making her look te way she looks. Having access to professional help to look good does not make one a phony. Oprah is not without problems, she's human after all. But I have found her to be candid and genuine about her upbringing, her emotional problems, her weight loss and her weaknesses. She is a strong inspirational woman who gives voice to so many issues from childhood abuse and obesity to spiritual guidance and giving a strong voice to women. If she had made a comment 20 yrs ago then she has more than rectified her stance on that and if she can change than so can we.

BBB I know you've been carrying that comment with you for many years but maybe it's time to take its power away, especially knowing that Oprah certainly does not feel that way anymore.

I hate to see any woman put down. Even Oprah or any regular people. Women can never win with this type of scrutiny. If we wear makeup we're phonies. If we don't wear makeup we don't care about ourselves.

Last edited by Palestrina; 05-25-2014 at 11:32 AM.
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Old 05-26-2014, 05:05 PM   #27  
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BBB, I love your honesty and your thought provoking posts.

As for Oprah, she is the biggest phony of them all. My hubby has seen her several times passing through JFK airport sans all the makeup and hair support, and she is unrecognizable.

I hope you come to see yourself as the amazing person that resonates through the boards.
I'm unrecognizable without makeup too. Not ugly at all, but I looked quite different than even wearing light makeup. Nothing wrong with Oprah taking care of herself that way, or anyone else doing so, for that matter

Even super morbidly obese I didn't let myself get frumpy and not care. Taking care of one's appearance and body are things that can be independent of success or failure in weight management

Last edited by Arctic Mama; 05-26-2014 at 05:05 PM.
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Old 05-26-2014, 05:07 PM   #28  
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Oh and I have to disagree with the Tumblr on several points. Most notably, if anyone called me Baby Girl, suggested I make out with a female, and said that loving myself meant having sex in a public restroom, I'd deck them.

O_o

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Old 05-26-2014, 09:03 PM   #29  
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I'm unrecognizable without makeup too. Not ugly at all, but I looked quite different than even wearing light makeup. Nothing wrong with Oprah taking care of herself that way, or anyone else doing so, for that matter

Even super morbidly obese I didn't let myself get frumpy and not care. Taking care of one's appearance and body are things that can be independent of success or failure in weight management
The reason why I brought up Oprah was that she was judgmental as to who should not go to the beach. She has a set a standards, a set of standards that are not possible for ordinary folks to reach because they do not have the same resources as she does. Even with her admitted weight problem, how much money does Oprah spend each year on personal chefs and trainers? It was just plain wrong for her to say that comment. jmo
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Old 05-27-2014, 10:26 AM   #30  
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The reason why I brought up Oprah was that she was judgmental as to who should not go to the beach. She has a set a standards, a set of standards that are not possible for ordinary folks to reach because they do not have the same resources as she does. Even with her admitted weight problem, how much money does Oprah spend each year on personal chefs and trainers? It was just plain wrong for her to say that comment. jmo
I can see why it is, but I don't think that its wrong that she was at least upfront about it. Many people, including myself, think "wrong" things, we just don't have the guts to admit it/don't want to deal with the social repercussions...
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