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Old 05-12-2014, 07:31 PM   #1  
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Arrow At the end of my rope... can't deal with this anymore

Hi guys,

This is a long story but I'll cut it short. I've had this hernia for 7 years. It's gotten so big I look like a pregnant woman.

I've seen 2 surgeons and 3 anastheologists. The first surgeon was willing to do the surgery but we moved and had to use a new hospital. Months later, We went to the new hospital, met the new surgeon, everything was good, but on the day of the surgery I was sent back home by this anastheologist because I was a little sick. (Surgeon was willing to do it then anyway but I was told to go back home)

Meanwhile I was diagnosed with diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. So when I went back for the 2nd time, I was sent back home because I was coughing alot (due to the ramipril I was given eg. high blood pressure meds that make certain people cough alot). Well the same anastheologist sent me back home and told me to go see a pulmologist and get a sleep apnea test that can take a year, and lose weight.

So I'm like ok, will do.. sigh 2nd time sent back home.

Now it's been a year and I've lost a bit of weight but still have all my medical conditions... should I even bother going back. I never went to see the pulmologist because I knew it was just a medication problem, I don't cough anymore.

I really had alot of anxiety about this whole process and just want this fixed so I can get a job and go on with my life. But im wondering if i should even bother?

My goal is to get to my ideal weight, lose the diabetes and all my medical conditions but It's hard when you cant even get out of your house because youre so embarassed about how you look.

This has been such a gruesome experience, Ive had pressure from everyone to get this done, on a daily basis. I just don't want to go through the whole process just to be sent back home again, after being told I'm fat, Is the anastheologist right and this is an elective surgery when the hernia is as big as a cantaloupe?

I'm planning on starting yet again, the whole procedure again for a 3rd time with a new surgeon at a new hospital, hoping to avoid that same anastheologist, ( other 2 I met had no problem operating on me ), but I've been delaying this for so long It's given me severe anxiety, I barely leave my house. This has caused severe financial problems and depression. I am sick of feeling like this.

Some days I really feel like Sandra Bullock in "the Net" where a little noise outside makes me jump, and panic. Like it's become pretty bad, some days are better than others.

I bike at home and eat better but Im not losing weight fast enough.

This is the first time in 7 years I talk to anyone about this.

Any suggestions?

Last edited by Daralina; 05-12-2014 at 07:38 PM.
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Old 05-12-2014, 08:31 PM   #2  
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I don't know enough about the medical procedure to give you any suggestions, but I do feel bad for what you've been through. I think a lot depends on whether the hernia is actually causing additional medical problems. Sometimes it is dangerous to do surgery on someone who has a lot of weight if it's not a life or death emergency. That's probably what they are concerned about. I'm wondering if you could check around and find a doctor in your area who is a specialist in this field. I think someone needs to explain to you what all is involved with the surgery and what they are concerned about, not just send you home, telling you to lose weight.

Maybe someone with more knowledge of this will reply.

Good luck to you.
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Old 05-12-2014, 09:26 PM   #3  
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I don't know how much weight you have to lose, but there are some concerns about undergoing anesthesia if you are significantly obese. I think they would be concerned about being able to ventilate you properly, as that is important. The main concern I think (after cardiac issues, anesthetic death, etcetera) would be developing a deep vein thrombus (a big honkin' blood clot in your leg), that could break loose and travel to your lungs. This is a lot more common that you think as a post surgical complication, and even as a complication of being sedentary in general. Additionally, if you are carrying a lot of weight over the abdominal muscles, it will be harder to do the surgery, and the surrounding muscles themselves are likely very weakened from years of having a hernia and excess weight. The time after surgery will be harder as well, as it will be crucial to have the right amount of movement to prevent dehiscence of the surgical site, but have enough walking to prevent DVT. The surgical site likely will take longer to heal if there is a lot of adipose (fat), as this type of tissue does not have a lot of blood supply, and can be prone to infection and necrosis (tissue death).

Now, all of that being said, this is a condition that is greatly affecting your life, whether it is an "elective" procedure or not. I would think you could find a supportive health care team that would be willing to take the time to go over this with you and understand that you are ready to have this thing taken care of. After all, they do bariatric procedures on the super obese on a routine basis. It's not like these patients are low risk either, as they often have comorbid conditions from being heavy. And bariatric procedures are elective, the last time I checked.

Don't give up. As someone who has a long history of various medical problems, I have found that you often have to be your own advocate and present yourself with the information you have found in your research. Basically, do not take no for an answer; and if that anesthesiologist doesn't want to do the work, ask for one that will. And make sure they know that you have been doing what you can to lose weight, but it is hard to exercise when you have to strap your intestines into a compression garment to keep them from bulging out of your midline. I am sure they wouldn't deal with that! I hope this helped. I am sorry you feel so terrible. I am sure this has been a heavy burden on your mind, and I hope you are able to find a solution. If they separate conjoined twins, I am sure they can repair your hernia for cryin' out loud!
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Old 05-13-2014, 07:05 AM   #4  
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What the others said. You are at high risk for intra-operative and post-operative complications. They are delaying for your benefit (and to be truthful, their benefit, too). Continue losing weight. Exercise is great, if you can do it, but diet is even more important. I wish you the best.
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Old 05-13-2014, 07:29 AM   #5  
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I'm so sorry to hear you are suffering with a long term medical issue that is going unresolved. I can't pretend to know the risks of surgery involved in your condition but I know that no matter those risks are that you should be receiving medical care one way or the other. If surgery is not option right now due to your weight then your medical caregivers should be providing you with resources that will get you to where you need to be. This is completely inexcusable and yet another example of how our medical system fails us daily in this country. I'm sick and tired of the "we can't help you until you help yourself first" BS that doctors continuously dole out and subsequently wash their hands of us.

If I were you I would go to another doctor. Pester them. Ok, I can't have the surgery now. When? Why? I need help, I can't lose this weight without your help.

Is it really so hard for them to help us when we need it?
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Old 05-13-2014, 08:40 AM   #6  
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You are worth taking care of. Go get seen and see what your current goals/needs have to be. Whether it is operate now or wait a bit more. Call it a "progress check up" in your head if that works better. Rather than this "pass/fail" thing.

Go see a counselor for anxiety management/embarassed how you look thoughts. These thoughts are self limiting and not HELPING you any.

Hang in there. I know it can feel hard.

hugs
A.

Last edited by astrophe; 05-13-2014 at 08:41 AM.
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Old 05-15-2014, 01:33 AM   #7  
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Thanks for all your responses and good wishes! I'm just going to have to go onto a major hard core life change of diet and exercise if I want this to be done this year. I'm 140kilos, 6 feet tall.
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