Hi everyone,
Today, I was thinking back over the history of the many dieting phases I've had in my lifetime. (I've dieted on and off since my teens, and really felt fat since 9 or 10.) The thing is, even when I was a reasonable weight for my height (when I got married 15 years back), I still felt ugly. I hated my full figure, I hated my face, I just hated---everything. I realize that I have to change that. Even when I get down to my goal weight, I likely won't be satisfied if I don't tackle this.

Can anyone suggest a book that might help?

Beautiful You: A Daily Guide to Radical Self Acceptance

This is a book that guides you through daily exercises of self acceptance. There's 365 entries, some of them are guided journaling exercises, things to think about for the day, things to say and look for in a mirror, etc. I like it because it's a hands on thing that I can do for just a few minutes every day and puts me in a loving frame of mind.

In addition to that I have found that I indulge myself in very negative self-talk. I'm used to looking in the mirror and immediately spotting 10things I don't like that I see. I say "I can't even bend over because of my gigantic stomach" when I tie my shoe laces or "look at how skinny that person is, I must look like a giant next to her." So I'm learning how to counter all those thoughts now. The whole idea is to stop the thought and replace it with a good one. Once you get the hang of it it becomes easier to do and it helps A LOT!!!

Wannabeskinny,

I think Dr. Phil's book is the best. It gives you ways to improve your eating, and the way your thinking.

How to replace negative thoughts with positive ones.
How to become more active.
Weeks of Menus.

It's the 7 steps you need to lose weight permanently. I can't remember the rest. I bought my book at a thrift store for $1.

Hope this helps.

The book that helped me more than anything was "This year I will" by MJ Ryan. Although it doesn't deal with the emotional issues surrounding weight gain. It does give practical advice for making changes in life. There are a lot of tools and a lot if books on how to lose weight and how to deal with the emotional issues. But personally I needed practical ways of making the changes I needed to. I can say from my experience, I read a lot of books and used a lot of different methods and even now I still changing the way I do things. As my body changes so does my approach. Good luck!

Hello rosesandholly I can't tell you how many books I have picked up and started to read to help me with these feelings that are so similar to yours. The society we live in makes sure that we feel that way. For me, no matter how many books or articles I read the minute I walk out there in the world all my information I have gleaned off the books disappears.
I look in the mirror before I leave and think, hey, you look great and then all it takes is a few minutes before something triggers me into thinking, "Ugh, what were you thinking, you are undesirable and worthless."
In my rational mind I don't care, as I am not looking for anything, but in fact maybe I am, I would like to find that nugget of gold that could help me too, so if you find it, do tell, in the meantime I will try to focus on losing some weight so I can at least feel good about my physical body presentation.
I have never been on a form like this, trying to reach out in other ways, I hope it helps me.
Will now see if I can find the book, Beautiful You: A Daily Guide to Radical Self Acceptance, sounds like something that might be of use.
Good luck with your journey.

Hi Wannabeskinny,
I actually have this book. I took it home from my mom's house with her permission. (She had it for years and never used it, said I could have it.) I was looking at it just the other day and got a wake up call. I'd actually done some of the workbook portion and planned to hit my weight loss goals by New Years 2014! Needless to say that was just another phase that went nowhere.

This time, I am actually doing the exercises in the book and hope it will be helpful for me.