I had a similar problem back in college trying to tote my art stuff to and from a class that was a 20 minute walk from my dorm, twice a week. The stuff in my portfolio was so heavy that it hurt my shoulders and back to use the strap. It was so big that it would drag on the ground holding it at my side, so I'd have to hold it up a little which would kill my arms. I also had a tackle box to carry. I felt like I was the only one struggling, but I lost a lot of weight that year without trying. Must've been a good workout.
I've had 2 shock moments, once in 2011 when I had reached 240 lbs. I refused to get any heavier and lost 53 lbs. Weight crept back on slowly and then very quickly in 2013 while living in a hotel. Then this New Years I got another shock when I realized I had re-gained 40 of those lbs back since summer 2012. This year I resolved to lose again and keep it off.
I had many such shocks - but the thing that finally got me to permanently turn my life around was turning 40 and realizing that I had wasted my thirties, and part of my twenties, being depressed, lonely, self-conscious and miserable. When 4-0 loomed on the horizon, I had 2 choices...change my life, or end my life.
I had so many you would have thought I got the point.
-Trip out east for a wedding with all my friends. We drove. My feet were so swollen I could barely walk & I had to stay back from several outings. We went to one landmark that required a mile hike in and then down something like 100 steps. I stayed for all of five seconds because I didn't want my friends to see how long it took me to get back up the steps and the shape I'd be in after. talk about mortifying.
-My employers had to buy me a chair specially designed for people my size.
- Driving out to the highway weigh scale in the middle of the night to find out how much I weighed because I couldn't do it on the scale at home (this was something my dad did, and he DIED because of his weight).
You really would have thought I'd get the message, but it was a combination of the trip out East and finding out I had two weddings to go to in 2013.
Yup. Vanity. 100 percent. Good thing though, because I got asked to be a bridesmaid in one of those weddings, and even though I'd lost 60 pounds, I barely fit into the biggest dress I could get.
I had many such shocks - but the thing that finally got me to permanently turn my life around was turning 40 and realizing that I had wasted my thirties, and part of my twenties, being depressed, lonely, self-conscious and miserable. When 4-0 loomed on the horizon, I had 2 choices...change my life, or end my life.
I chose life.
This was huge for me, realizing my 20's had been WASTED. Now I'm 18 months from 30 and I'll be damned if I'm not close to goal by then.
It was a jacket. A jacket that I will thank forever.
I had a work fair I attend once a year. I only wear this particular jacket to that fair. I wore it last last April. Or rather I tried to. It was about 2 to 4 inches not fitting on my belly.
I also was not fitting into some XXL shirts for the first time. There were some underlying reasons, of course. HUGE reasons.
But that jacket. I will never forget it. I didn't make all my changes at once but that jacket not fitting did start/galvanize my path.
That store I couldn't fit into their XXL? I went back less than 10 months later. I could comfortably fit into their mediums.
Last edited by diamondgeog; 04-03-2014 at 01:22 PM.
I have had a lot. This time around it was being winded by walking up the stairs from where I normally park my car. It had never been an issue before. I don't know why I am so out of shape now. But I am working to fix it.
The shock to me was when my husband and I suffered an early miscarriage and my doctor believes that the miscarriage and the subsequent struggle to get pregnant for the past two years is due to my weight.
Getting pregnant and having a healthy pregnancy and child is my number 1 goal!
Can't get the multiquote function to work. But here's my follow up to some good points-
John P: It's not getting easier that's the really shocking thing!! I thought it would have by now too. But some days it feels even worse. While I haven't lost weight I haven't gained any either in the meantime. I have been struggling with sleep issues due to stress though.
Wannabeskinny: Yes I agree I need to not focus on others and the embarrassment. I try not to but it's hard when I know there's a line building up behind me (the stairs are like single file each way, so usually no one passes). I do sometimes pull off on a platform to "check my phone" but I hate how I'm panting. Anyways the point is I should not worry about others.
Mara: You are right, I hold my breath! Or at least I breathe kind of shallowly, but I think that's because I get panicky and anxious about the people behind me. I should focus on SLOW and BREATHE.
It's interesting to hear others' struggles with stairs/college and work campuses. You have to be FIT to make it to class on time, we have 10 minutes to get to class and from one side of the campus to the other, up that hill...there's no way in hot heck I could ever make it! I have to structure my schedule carefully so I have enough time and not have to rush. I get very sweaty when it's even a little warm too so there's that concern. I really can't wait to get this weight off.
(Nibog- I am so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. ((hugs)) )
My wake up call was when I realized that I've spent years being too fat and unhappy to finally meet my boyfriend (LDR), realizing that I too have wasted years, and years of memories...it still makes me sad, but every time I think about it a fire is lit inside of me.
I have slowly been losing but really got a kick in the butt after coming back from vacation. When I'm at home I eat well, but when I'm with my boyfriend we eat out way too much. After three weeks with him I gained back 20lbs and am over 300lbs again. Talk about a shock!
It's interesting to hear others' struggles with stairs/college and work campuses. You have to be FIT to make it to class on time, we have 10 minutes to get to class and from one side of the campus to the other, up that hill...there's no way in hot heck I could ever make it! I have to structure my schedule carefully so I have enough time and not have to rush. I get very sweaty when it's even a little warm too so there's that concern. I really can't wait to get this weight off.
(Nibog- I am so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. ((hugs)) )
Yep! That's another factor. I move so slow compared to everybody else on campus.
I totally had that with one of my MWF classes one semester! It was a three flight staircase, I think. Long ones. At first it nearly ended me, but eventually I could take those stairs faster than anyone around me! One thing that helped was to take measured breaths and focus on breathing in while I went up the stairs. Dunno if that works for anyone else, but it did for me. Eventually my friends complained about how fast I flew up AND down those stairs.
But the stair thing happened AFTER my wake up call.
My wake up call was seeing over 200 lbs on the scale. I was 210 at 21, and I realized that that average out to a 10 lb gain a year. If I kept doing that, I'd be 300 lbs by thirty, and so on. I'd die from it. That all hit me as I stood on the scale that one day. That got my butt in gear.
So I've been at this high weight for 10 years. And i'd been in denial. I'd weigh myself once in six months, if that and then promptly ignore the scale. All my clothes were large sizes (but i'd huff and say that the sizing was off, not me) etc etc.
But i was just hanging with my elder brother (who also has weight issues) and he said something so matter of factly: "so two out of 3 of us (siblings) is fat"
He was making a point about how growing up we had bad eating habits and the only one who changed his lifestyle (my younger brother) is both healthy and fit.
The word FAT just fell on my ears like an anvil. He wasn't saying to to me. But i realised that that's how he saw classified me physically. That's when i let go of denial and actually checked out my BMI (i'm in the obese category)
I've spent the past 2 years struggling to lose weight (and have gained and lost 5 pounds every few months). But my fitness has definitely improved - I excercise on average 4 days a week and am healthy.
The next step is to gain control over my bad eating habits and reduce my weight permanently.
