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-   -   Will I ever be able to lose weight? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/weight-loss-support/294008-will-i-ever-able-lose-weight.html)

Palestrina 03-23-2014 09:49 AM

Throwing out entire groups of food is for people who think that food is a problem. Sugar is evil, carbs are made for a different species (aliens maybe?), fats are for fatties, and finally eating becomes some kind of chemistry experiment. You can't concoct a new diet, that's like concocting a new kind of chemical. In real life I've met lots of paleo eaters, lots of carb haters but you know what? I've never seen anyone die a paleo eater or a carb hater. I've seen people swear things off for life, but never seen anyone follow through with it long term. I've seen people struggle with food until the day they die, I've seen people miserable trying to find the right way to eat.

Here's the thing, going grain free and low carb is for people who don't have problems with food behaviors. They don't have eating disorders. They feel perfectly capable of controlling themselves around food and don't feel emotionally deprived when restricting themselves in that way. Fine, someone must like that though I have never in real life met anyone like that, EVER! Only on the internet have I come across people like that so in my mind they're about as real as a video game. They're known as DIETERS. I've learned that dieters are pretty miserable people, because they keep talking about food and especially bad food. There's no other reason that someone keeps talking about bad food unless they're miserable, no reason whatsoever. Normal people don't go around talking about bad foods, they just don't, look around at the normal people in your life. Tell them about your grain theory and watch how their face goes blank as they reach for their tuna sandwich and plug you into the "cray cray" category.

Sure we can tweak our diets to be more nutritious. Sure we feel awful if we eat a whole box of donuts. Nobody is going to argue that. But going around telling everyone that donuts are going to kill you is scaremongering at best lol. They're sweet little yum yums and if someone crazy person inside your head is telling you that they're evil then you're no better than the ancient greeks that believed that that Zeus was pelting thunder down on their heads.

Overcoming an eating disorder and losing weight are two entirely different things. I suppose someone can get up to 300lbs without having an eating disorder but I don't know for sure, is that really possible?

yoyoma 03-23-2014 10:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pattience (Post 4968952)
[I will probably modify this post as i learn more this evening]

From wikipeida sources of omega 6 fatty acids.



That should just about take care of the omega 6 argument. I mean if you give up grains for that reason, shouldn't you also give up eggs, poultry, nuts, avocados, all those oils? I eat a few of these things, including a lot of spaghetti, and i still eat it on my diet, though less in the last week or two because i replaced a fair bit of it with beans to get more protein.

1) I have not given up grains. But I limit them AND OTHER STARCHY CARBS (like potatoes and legumes) to avoid triggering my hunger.

2) omega-6 is an essential fatty acid (which means your body cannot create it). You need to eat it. I do not avoid eating omega-6 EFAs. Most sources of EFAs contain some amount of both 3 and 6.

However, the typical modern diet contains an imbalance of omega-6 and omega-3, with too much 6 relative to the mount of omega-3. Grain is heavy in omega-6; most green plant sources are heavier in omega-3. Grain-fed farm-raised animals also tend to be disproportionate in omega-6. Wild-caught or grass-fed meats (foraging on plants or plant-eating game) have a more favorable proportion of omega-3.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pattience (Post 4968952)
Well if it does trigger your hunger, I won't deny that's possible. But how much are we talking about and what do you do? Do you keeping eating plain rice? does anyone eat a loaf of plain bread?

I do not eat plain rice. I mix my small serving of whole grain rice in with my veg and protein food. If I add too much, I become hungry too soon. I also made a mistake recently, adding the small serving of rice to a dish that contained beans and ended up hungry.

I don't remember the last time I bought white bread. The only bread product I buy is whole wheat bagels for my daughter. When I am "maintaining" and get sloppy enough to eat a half WW bagel dry, I get into trouble. I also know that I am prone to binge on red lentils. It's not just grains for me, but starchy carbs in general.

mars735 03-23-2014 10:03 AM

I'm a very happy dieter, and very real, trust me. I ate low carb and continue to do so because I feel healthier. And I am thrilled to be in a body that can exercise and move with ease. Shopping for clothes is now easy. Eating to maintain those experiences requires effort since entrenched habits die hard. Labels like "eating disorder" are useful for insurance billing but too arbitrary to realistically characterize the collective experience of any group.

Imready85 03-24-2014 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pattience (Post 4968205)
If we knew what you ate in a typical day for the last three days minus the binge, we might be able to offer you some clarifying info.

In the meantime we are just guessing what might be going on?

a) you are restricting calories too much and getting hungry
b) your mood and therefore seratonin levels are low
c) your foods are not well balanced and therefore not satisfying. YOu want to have a balance of something like 55g carbs, 20 % fats (preferably mostly vegetable fats or fish fats) and 25% protein. You can adjust all these about 5-10% either way.
d)the foods you are eating lack nutrition and are highly processed and have a lot of calories for their weight.
e) you are not busy enough and haven't addressed boredom or other lifestyle factors
f)your sleep patterns are out and contributing to this problem and you are not getting enough daylight.
g) you are under stress or pressure.
h) you are going too long without food and getting hungry between meals.

Start keeping a food diary somewhere. show us what you are doing and we can help you tweak it.
do it here for a little while if you want.

Hi everyone thank you so much for your posts and advice. I just checked this since I posted it, and just ready everything. I went on a binge this whole weekend. I ate everything in sight. Now I weighed myself and I am 285. The most I have ever weighed in my whole life. Last year I weighed 260 and managed to get down to 235. I thought this would be a good post to respond to to give y'all an idea of what I go through and how I eat. Here is an example of what I ate they day before I had a binge:

Breakfast:
Natural Protein Powder Shake w/organic milk-100 calories

Snack:
Fiber One Bar-90 calories

Lunch:
Roasted Chicken- 2 Pieces of Barbecued Chicken-270 calories
Steamed Veggies
Small Portion of Mac N Cheese-150 calories
Wheat toast-110 calories

Afternoon Snack-
Fruit blueberries, strawberries, cantelope

Dinner-
I went jog before dinner and when I got back I had another Protein Shake and a few gummy bears


Just to give y'all an idea. Im puzzled because I do not know examples of a balanced diet or how to execute one. I live in New Orleans and their is great food everywhere at every event you go to. But this is no excuse because I binge on everything even fast food. I was so miserable last night. I could not sleep. I could not breathe. I feel like I still cannot. I am constantly under pressure at work. Eating is my release. It is my number one hobby. My wife, my life and my greatest love. ALl I ever had was food. Wow this is sad to say.

Locke 03-24-2014 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Imready85 (Post 4969747)
I was so miserable last night. I could not sleep. I could not breathe. I feel like I still cannot. I am constantly under pressure at work. Eating is my release. It is my number one hobby. My wife, my life and my greatest love. ALl I ever had was food. Wow this is sad to say.

You probably didn't eat much more than a thousand calories yesterday. I would be miserable and binging if I ate that little, too. To lose weight you've gotta get a long term mindset on. You can't just punish yourself by restricting calories. You're going to hate yourself and be miserable.

Food is a delicious and pleasurable experience. It's meant to be that way. It shouldn't consume your life, though. I used to binge all the time, too. When it comes down to it it's not that pleasurable of an experience. I was wolfing food down so fast I could barely taste it. How is that enjoying food?

When you've got a lot of weight to lose and your beliefs about food are all messed up you have to take baby steps. Don't suddenly cut your calories down so low that even a 120 pound woman would be hungry! Be kind to yourself. Instead of counting calories at first why don't you just eat your normal foods and try to stop eating when you are just full?

Long term sustainable weightloss is about changing habits and "tweaking". It's not about gigantic changes that will leave you hungry and miserable.

miniapplecocoa 03-24-2014 02:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Imready85 (Post 4968168)
I have tried to eat right since Tuesday and today I binged like crazy. I love food more than anything and try to lose weight everyday, but it gets the best of me. I cannot give up food. SOmeone please offer any suggestions. Thank you

Yes, Yes I know I'm late but my answer to OP question is YES! YES! JUST KEEP TRYING! No matter how many times you fall just keep getting back up. PERIOD!

Munchy 03-24-2014 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Locke (Post 4969760)
You probably didn't eat much more than a thousand calories yesterday. I would be miserable and binging if I ate that little, too. To lose weight you've gotta get a long term mindset on. You can't just punish yourself by restricting calories. You're going to hate yourself and be miserable.

Food is a delicious and pleasurable experience. It's meant to be that way. It shouldn't consume your life, though. I used to binge all the time, too. When it comes down to it it's not that pleasurable of an experience. I was wolfing food down so fast I could barely taste it. How is that enjoying food?

When you've got a lot of weight to lose and your beliefs about food are all messed up you have to take baby steps. Don't suddenly cut your calories down so low that even a 120 pound woman would be hungry! Be kind to yourself. Instead of counting calories at first why don't you just eat your normal foods and try to stop eating when you are just full?

Long term sustainable weightloss is about changing habits and "tweaking". It's not about gigantic changes that will leave you hungry and miserable.

I agree with this. At first, just cut your normal meals down a bit and see if you lose any weight. Chances are, if you shave off just a little bit everyday, you could lose a pound or two per week. I'd assume that you could eat much closer to 1800 calories.

Here is an example of how much food it can be. No need to starve yourself - this isn't torture, it's just a series of little changes that become second nature after time.

You are never stuck - everyday is a new day, and you can get to where you want to be.

Munchy 03-24-2014 03:05 PM

Oops - double post

Imready85 03-24-2014 09:08 PM

Thank you all so much for the good words. I go to the store Wednesday. Does anyone know any good healthy recipes. I just need about 4 or 5. Thank you

Pattience 03-25-2014 04:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Imready85 (Post 4969747)
Hi everyone thank you so much for your posts and advice. I just checked this since I posted it, and just ready everything. I went on a binge this whole weekend. I ate everything in sight. Now I weighed myself and I am 285. The most I have ever weighed in my whole life. Last year I weighed 260 and managed to get down to 235. I thought this would be a good post to respond to to give y'all an idea of what I go through and how I eat. Here is an example of what I ate they day before I had a binge:

Breakfast:
Natural Protein Powder Shake w/organic milk-100 calories

Snack:
Fiber One Bar-90 calories

Lunch:
Roasted Chicken- 2 Pieces of Barbecued Chicken-270 calories
Steamed Veggies
Small Portion of Mac N Cheese-150 calories
Wheat toast-110 calories

Afternoon Snack-
Fruit blueberries, strawberries, cantelope

Dinner-
I went jog before dinner and when I got back I had another Protein Shake and a few gummy bears


Just to give y'all an idea. Im puzzled because I do not know examples of a balanced diet or how to execute one. I live in New Orleans and their is great food everywhere at every event you go to. But this is no excuse because I binge on everything even fast food. I was so miserable last night. I could not sleep. I could not breathe. I feel like I still cannot. I am constantly under pressure at work. Eating is my release. It is my number one hobby. My wife, my life and my greatest love. ALl I ever had was food. Wow this is sad to say.

You poor dear. I'm giving you a hug. You have come to a good place and you can learn from us. You can also get very confused by us so hang in there and don't give up. Be patient. You see my name. I call myself patience because i need more of it too.

The first thing that i would say is a problem that needs fixing with what you posted is that you are not eating enough. You have made yourself hungry so its natural to respond with a ravenous appetite.

The good thing is you are trying to eat protein and vegetables and fruit. Keep this up. Try to put fresh vegetables in every meal. A healthy diet, we are told incorporates 5 serves of different vegetables every day. One serve is about half a cup. You don't need to worry if you are not doing this rigorously all the time but try to head towards this. Try to eat 2.5 cups of vegetables every day and if possible 1/2 cup of that should be leafy vegetables like lettuce or spinach. I buy bags of mixed lettuce leaves from the supermarket. Or a cabbage mix. This makes it easier. a half a cup is not a big deal i often just shove it in my mouth with dressing if i'm cooking something else like pasta. Otherwise i chop it into my salads of various kinds.

I'm going to make another version of your menu which i think will serve you better.

Breakfast:
instead of this:
Natural Protein Powder Shake w/organic milk-100 calories

eat this:

1 fried egg on toast in a 1tsp of oil on 1 piece of whole grain toast
1 fried tomato cut in half

1/2 cup natural yoghurt with no added fat. go for whole milk it tastes better.
put 1 apple pear or other fruit you like in your yoghurt. chopped up
add 1tsp of mixed seeds - try sesame, flax or sunflower seeds mixed or not doesn't matter. these are high fat but high mineral content.

Snack:
Fiber One Bar-90 calories

skip this you don't need it. Have a piece of fruit if you do.

Lunch 3-4 hours after a breakfast

Roasted Chicken- 2 Pieces of Barbecued Chicken-270 calories How much does this weigh? Is it high in fat? Maybe leave the skin off.
Steamed Veggies - are ok if you like them. WEre they fresh? If not use fresh.
Small Portion of Mac N Cheese-150 calories (i don't know what that is probably its no good leave it out probably high in salt and fat)- have some salad instead but try to go for one that doesn't have lots of mayonnaise on it if you are buying it. Go for greek salad or other green style salads.
Wheat toast-110 calories is that one piece. later on you should be ok with just chicken and vegies but for now, it won't hurt to keep the toast. Is it whole grain? Give up white bread. It has almost no nutritional value. Its just pure energy and little satisfaction.

Don't eat in food courts. Their food is generally high fat and poor quality. choose better eateries if you are buying and if possible start making some lunches for yourself. We can come to that later.


Afternoon Snack-
Fruit blueberries, strawberries, cant elope - fine. good choices.

Dinner-
I went jog before dinner and when I got back I had another Protein Shake and a few gummy bears

Protein shakes are not real food. One a day is enough. Try to have real food though that you like and is healthy.
Skip the gummy bears while on a diet.

Sounds like your lunch is your main meal. that's fine.
A lighter dinner at home could be 125grams of spaghetti with some sort of fish in it or meat. You could try buying something like smoked salmon and chopping it up and 1/2 cup of tomato pasta sauce. Heat it through. That's very easy.
Have some salad on the side.

My thread has lots of recipes in it. I don't spend ages cooking and i make interesting salads you could try. Start at the end of my thread and look backwards in the link below. MOst of my cooking at the moment is quick and easy.

here a balanced diet includes about

5 serves of vegies when one serve is 1/2 cup of vegies. ideally its five different vegies a day
2 pieces of fruit

2.5 cups of milk and yoghurt per day total for calcium

protein at each meal either palm sized piece of fresh meat or fish, especially fish like salmon or sardines because of the omega 3 fatty acids which are very healthy, two eggs or 100g of beans or lentils

about 2 pieces of wholegrain or 100grams of uncooked pasta. NOt sure what that is in rice

fats - go for vegetables fast like avocados, seeds nuts and oils. But keep your serves small and use yummy things like nuts and seeds mixed in with salads and other recipes so you don't get carried away.

Uses bottled sauces in cooking to make a recipe work. you know like the asian things. soy, hoi sin and so on.

keep away from or keep to only once a week - pastries, cakes, chocolate, sweets, puddings, lollies, tarts, pizza, packet chips, sweetened cereals, flavoured milks, energy bars, dried fruit, deep fried fried foods of any kind.

limit alcohol to no more than one drink a day.

Avoid restaurants where servings are large and covered in cheese. If you are going to eat cheese, keep to a small piece as its almost pure fat but still has nutritional value. Its very salty so easy to want to keep on eating more and more.

Try new foods like korean, japanese at a restaurant not a take away place.
Avoid meat dishes at indian restaurants they are full of nuts, butter and fat. Best avoid indian restaurants really .

Let us know how you get on. We'll give you more tips if you ask.

Dollydimple 03-25-2014 04:21 AM

What lovely recipes. Great whether you are on a diet or not.
How are things today I'mready? I'm like you, I have to get my head in the right place or I binge. We can do it love. Just that we have a few false starts that's all. Hang in there.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you over here in a chilly today, but very bright, UK

yoyoma 03-25-2014 07:21 AM

I think Pattience made some good suggestions.


I would add the following advice... try to pay attention to when you get hungry soonest after a meal. If you find it is after you eat a meal with starchy carbs (like bread, pasta, or potatoes), try swapping those for more raw or cooked veggies, healthy fats, and bigger servings of protein.

I strongly second the advice about healthy fats to make sure you are eating enough of them (sources like fish, avocado, nuts, etc). These are high calorie but can help you feel more satiated and they are important nutrients. Many people have trouble with portion control on nuts... in my case I intentionally buy raw, unsalted nuts and that makes it easier to count out 10 almonds (or whatever) and that's it.

If this approach to managing your weight still doesn't work well for you, you might investigate some of the other boards and approaches on 3fc, such as intermittent fasting, Atkins, Intuitive Eating and others. There are people who find success with each of these very different approaches.

Good luck and I hope you find an approach that works well for you!

Pattience 03-25-2014 08:15 AM

Definitely stick with the raw and unsalted nuts and seeds as yoyoma says.

Salted nuts are too morish. And some seeds lose some of their nutrients when heated too much.

I would add another point. You don't have to try to shut down your whole usual way of eating overnight. But i find it best to try to tailor your own meal plans to the style of foods are used to eating. This probably only doesn't work if your diet is extremely unhealthy but it could be adapted still perhaps.

But i mean consider looking at the traditional foods in your region or from your culture too.

Are you able to cook at home? Are you interested in learning how to cook? I recommend it if you want to learn to eat healthy in the long term.

Munchy 03-25-2014 09:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Imready85 (Post 4970033)
Thank you all so much for the good words. I go to the store Wednesday. Does anyone know any good healthy recipes. I just need about 4 or 5. Thank you

Check out www.skinnytaste.com first - it's the best! www.cookinglight.com and www.eatingwell.com have really good recipes too.

kelijpa 03-25-2014 12:27 PM

I like an old WW exercise, identifying which foods you can control and which ones you can't.

You paid attention to what you were eating and how it made your body/mind feel (kind of like mindfulness or IE) then you would classify foods like a traffic light. Red light foods were ones you couldn't control, yellow were sometimes troublesome, etc. then you could plan better knowing how types of food affect your body.

After awhile you revisit and find that some red light foods might be yellow or vice versa.

The most important thing of all is to keep trying, don't give up, you will find something that works for you and you can live with :sunny:


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