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-   -   Looking for motivation to keep going :( (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/weight-loss-support/293956-looking-motivation-keep-going.html)

caldawg89 03-20-2014 08:17 PM

Looking for motivation to keep going :(
I have been on my journey for almost 2 months now, and I have hit a wall big time. I am so busy with my education, and have a million other things going on, I am struggling to fit in exercise. I am exhausted all the time, so when I get home, I just crash out. To my credit, while I have slacked off on my exercise, I have continued to monitor my eating. I am having trouble with my friend too, she has no desire to do anything, and isnt really eating properly, and I am copping it off her mum because she isnt motivated anymore, when she wasnt really to begin with. I just find it so exhausting trying to run my life, keep to my diet, find time to exercise and to motivate myself, let alone try to do that for my friend. I feel a million times worse for not exercising, my sleep is suffering, my skin is starting to break out and I just feel restless, but there arent enough hours in the day right now. What I am asking is for you lovely people to give me a kick up the ***, or some motivation or whatever you think will make me want to make time in my shedule to exercise. Please help, I dont want to be a quitter :(

MauiKai 03-20-2014 09:17 PM

All you can really do is one day at a time. Make it happen today and don't worry about tomorrow. Repeat ;)

It's tough. I've failed more than once. But you just have to keep marching forward.

kaybee1 03-20-2014 09:18 PM

First of all, you need to breathe. And then prioritize. It might sound harsh, but who do you care more about? Yourself, or your friend? It's great you want to help her but if she's pulling you down you're going to have to put some distance between you two - at least when it comes to weight loss and staying motivated.

You should always be number 1. This is your health that you're talking about. I understand school is one thing, but what are the million other things going on? Are they as important as your health? Maybe you just have to cut back on the socializing or look at your day and create a time-budget and make it happen.

I'm going to continue being harsh because it's what helps me when i'm down lol. Only you can make anything happen. Only you can make the change. No Fat Fairy is going to come knocking at your door and magically take away all of your problems (although that would be awesome) so I really think you need to focus on where YOU fit in YOUR life.

It's fantastic that you kept on track with your eating, that's huge. And it will still make an impact for you as you continue on your journey even if you don't get as much exercise as you'd like. So keep it up. You can do it!

It also helps to create S.M.A.R.T. goals that is: specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time bound. Start with small goals to keep yourself on track and work from there. It's easier to see the light at the end of the tunnel that way!

Main thing, don't give up - no matter what external pressures there are you still have the strength to persevere, believe in yourself!

LiannaKole 03-20-2014 11:17 PM

Maybe pick a different exercise. Like, if you don't have time to go to the gym, but you can walk to the store for grocery shopping and carry back your purchases, do that - it's two birds with one stone. Or if you're close enough, walk/cycle to work. Personally I tend to do better with exercise when it has a goal.

And I agree with the one day at a time thing. Stick to what works for you for the most part. The biggest thing is that it is WORTH IT in the end. You'll be effing thrilled that you stuck with it, I guarantee that. You won't look back and wish you'd done something other than exercise. :)

Good luck with everything!

Sassyblonde 03-21-2014 02:37 AM

I have been there. I have two kids in elementary school, work full time (60hrs) plus have a side business. I exercise every single day, today was extra hectic and I only got 20 minutes in. It's not about time. It's about priority. I say this in the most understanding way possible. I never thought I had time and yes I had to cut some things out like watching tv. I fit in exercise wherever I can whenever I can. I just know that no matter where I go tomorrow I will exercise. I've danced while getting ready for work, cooking dinner, doing dishes. In the car on a long trip...I googled car exercises and did those. It takes a huge shift in focus and as hard as it is to hear you choose how you spend your time. It's not easy and it's good advice to take it one day at a time. Just plan tomorrow. And I do not mean to be cruel but your friend's motivation cannot be your responsibility. You can be an encouragement but true motivation comes from within. You are working on your education for your mind and future so think of this as working on your body and health for your future...it's equally important and deserves the same attention. Good luck and take care of yourself

caldawg89 03-24-2014 03:18 PM

Just letting everyone know, yesterday was my first day back at the gym in about a week. I needed to take some time to myself, to have a break and recharge physically and mentally. I worked really hard yesterday, running further and for longer than I ever have, and I feel amazing. For the first time in a week, I was truly tired and I slept well, not even stress could keep me up! Thankyou to everyone who commented, I really appreciate it! I am not well and truly back on track, and I have signed up for a kickboxing class to try something new. I am lucky to have such an excellent support base here. As for my friend, she is still coming to the gym with me, but I have had a serious chat with her and her family. I told them in no uncertain terms that I am not responsible for her, I am responsible for myself, and she needs to get a grip and start holding herself responsible for her actions. My job is to provide encouragement, not to be wholey and soley responsible for her working out. If she doesnt want to come to the gym? Not my problem anymore. If she doesnt want to do pilates? Not my problem anymore. If she goes to the gym and doesnt try her hardest? Not my problem anymore. If she hurts herself because she refuses to do pilates properly? Not my problem anymore. I have come to realise she is a product of her environment; she is an only child, with no responsibilities, her parents make all her decisions and she lives by what they say. This has led her to become lazy and overweight, as she lacks the drive to keep herself in check. I have caught her cheating on our diet, she snacks the second there is food in the house, and she is lazy with exercise, but its not my problem anymore. And I said all of this to her and her family. So now I dont know what she will do. Her parents are guilting her into the gym but she hates it, yet she refuses to take control of what she wants. I have made so many suggestions about different exercises we can do together, our exercise regimen is centred around her work, yet she doesnt want to do it. She hates exercise but she wont eat a calorie controlled meal and refuses to stick to portion control. Not my problem anymore. I know I probably sound like a really bad friend as I write this, and I feel like one, but over the last 2 weeks, I have been struggling to keep myself motivated, why should I have to do the same for her? She is doing this all under sufferance. I guess from now on, I am going to do what I want; I have no issue with our new portion control thing, and I love going to the gym and trying new exercises, so I am just going to get on with it. I have worked too hard and have too much to lose by staying the way I am, and its time for me to be selfish. I will still support her, but I refuse to be responsible for her. I also went shopping with my boyfriend yesterday, and for the first time since I was in highschool, I bought a size 16 top. I am so happy with this result and it felt even better after smashing myself with an hour and a half of straight cardio :) Thanks again everyone, I appreicate it so much!

lotsakids 03-24-2014 03:24 PM


Originally Posted by MauiKai (Post 4967494)
All you can really do is one day at a time. Make it happen today and don't worry about tomorrow. Repeat ;)

It's tough. I've failed more than once. But you just have to keep marching forward.

Love it! I was taking a shower after my workout today and started dreading tomorrow's workout. dumb dumb dumb. Now I'm enjoying the fact I got it done. thanks!

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