Please help me keep going......

  • Hi all, my name is Kelly and while I have lurked a little bit on this site this is my first post.

    My story is kinda of long so bear with me. In 2008 I was happily married and had just had my second child. I weighed in at 162lbs. I decided that I wanted to be "a hot Army wife" before we left to live in Germany. I busted my butt at the gym for 3 and a half months before we left and was happy to weigh in at 137 the day we left. Once in Germany we didnt have child care and I quickly gained most of the weight back. In 2009 I got an IUD and ballooned up to 190.00 In Nov of 2010 my husband depolyed and from stress and all I went back and forth between 180 and 175. I ended up leaving germany in Dec of 2010 after seperating from my husband. In the last 3 years I have gained 20 lbs putting me at 212.....miserable. 2 weeks ago I decided enough. One of the huge things for me is putting my ex in his place. One of things he said to me that I will never forget, is " all you accomplished while I was deployed was sitting in your pjs and getting fat" I would love to be 50-60 lbs lighter when he comes to pick up our kids in June. So like I said 2 weeks ago I changed things up. I am eating between 1200-1500 calories a day and walking 5 times a week. The first week I lost 4 lbs! Than some how I gained 2 back. I need advise I guess.....someone at work told me today that walking wont be enough? Is that true? I dont have time for much more, being a single mom. Any help and or support would be great.
  • Hi! I'm so glad you are at least able to feel motivated to make a healthy lifestyle change. Making that commitment again is definitely the first step and it sounds like you have been on track for the past couple weeks. Weight fluctuates and as long as you weren't cheating on calories and consistently exercising, don't worry about those couple of pounds (they could have been water weight or gaining of muscle).

    With that being said, I would definitely try to make sure you are getting all 1200-1500 calories of very high nutrition foods, and minimal to no junk. I have been busting my butt, and still have a lot of fat, because even though I was eating low calories, I was eating the wrong types of foods.

    Also, walking is great for losing a few calories and getting a low impact workout, but I would really suggest doing a little more cardio and probably a little bit of weight lifting. I know you said you don't have much time, but maybe you could jog in place while making dinner, playing with the kids. Jogging in place is my go-to exercise, and isn't as high impact as actually running or regular jogging for me.

    Just try to stay on track, and if you have a bad day or a gain, just keep going. Don't let one slip up ruin your entire lifestyle. It's a lifestyle, so a few mistakes along the way are to be expected
  • sweetkell05 - Welcome! Join in on a challege thread. The December weight loss challenge is only 2 days old and the group is very supportive (under support forum/support groups/chicks up for a challenge). Check in there. You can do daily or weekly accountability. I agree with truehappiness - you may want to mix it up. There are some great videos that use little space (I love Turbo Jam). Eat good and stay motivated! Good luck!
  • Thank You!!

    I think I will look for that December Challenge!

    I appreciate the kind words! I also thought about trying the couch to 5k....any thoughts on the program?
  • Welcome!

    I stewed a bit about what to say, but here goes.

    The journey to a healthy lifestyle, is one you need to choose for yourself.

    I understand your starting motivation, but, in the long run, it needs to become more than your ex. It needs to become "YOU"

    "YOU" are worth it.

    As far as the mechanics go. Weight loss is done in the kitchen with healthy eating. Fitness is done via exercise, whatever you like that you are willing to do on a consistent basis.

    Patience is key! Along with opening up your mind, to a lot of things. Try new foods. Track your eating habits, workouts, and how does what you are doing, affect how it's going.

    There is no one size fits all on the journey to a better and healthier life, it takes time and patience and the willingness to learn as you go.
  • Quote: One of the huge things for me is putting my ex in his place. One of things he said to me that I will never forget, is " all you accomplished while I was deployed was sitting in your pjs and getting fat" I would love to be 50-60 lbs lighter when he comes to pick up our kids in June.
    I don't have advice since I'm in the same boat, gaining weight after getting married. But I didn't want to read and run. I can't believe that anyone that ever had any love for you would say such a thing to the mother of his children. My Dad was in the military and my Mom was a single mother while he was away for months at a time. I know how difficult it is to hold down the fort when your husband is gone. What did he expect you to "accomplish" while he was away? The nerve!

    Obviously he's a loser and you're much better off without him. You've shed the riff raff and now you can focus on yourself. Work hard, lose the weight, work on building your confidence and never let anyone put you down for the number on a scale.
  • My advice is to forget about the June or any specific date and focus on it on a day-to-day basis. At least for me, when I focus on a date, it leads to procrastination.

    You can definitely lose weight with walking only. I have done it. Other people have done it. I have used Leslie Sansone DVDs, these are great since you don't have to get out of the house. Of course it is always better to add strength training etc, but you can definitely lose a lot just by walking. I am the same height as you and have had success with walking only going from 170 to the 140s. I tried to always do 90 minutes, and always at least 60 minutes. As you slim down, you keep tweaking.


    I echo the other poster re his comment, it does not deserve your attention. Instead of making it about showing him, make it about a positive change for you with great rewards. Why let him rent space in your mind? You deserve better than that.
  • Yes. In my journey of obesity I have learned a few things.

    1) It is calories in versus calories out but it also isn't, if that makes sense. 100 calories of doughnut compare to 100 calories of apple is going to do totally opposite things for your body. Eat 100 calories of doughnut/any treats sparingly and nourish your body frequently with good foods. It's really up to you to decide what 'good' foods are but most people find anything that comes from the earth is a good start.

    2) Exercise is important but weight loss begins in the kitchen. Exercise will aid in weight loss but is not the only way to lose weight and it isn't really even necessary, although it is recommended.

    3) Love yourself enough to take care of yourself. Do it for you. Do it because you're lovely and because you want to be fitter and healthier. It's nice to have dates in mind and goals but you also always have to keep it in the back of your mind that whatever you're doing should be a forever change. The old mantra of 'it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change' is really true and you'll get sick of hearing it but it's important to remember.

    Also, if something doesn't work don't keep trying it over and over again. I did and after a few years I finally thought ,"What the **** am I doing?" and I started reading as much current literature as I could. I started forming opinions for myself and trying things out. I finally did find something that works. Don't let someone tell you there is only one way because that's not true and if you believe that and you keep failing on one method you'll think it's you and not the method.
  • I started doing a C25K program. There are plenty of free apps. I choose after reading reviews the Ease into 5 K app which I really like. It is $2.

    I was always active growing up but never a runner. Running has really helped though. Weeks I do it I do loose more weight and it is a great feeling of accomplishment and I am sure provides untold health benefits besides even thinking about weight.

    I HIGHLY recommend getting the best shoes you can afford. I choose addidas boost which run about $150. I saved a little bit getting them on eBay after making sure of the fit in a store.

    It sounds really high. But any kind of injury will end up costing much more. And being overweight and running probably even more important for great shoes.

    As a side benefit they are the best walking shoes I have ever had. So not just one use only. I probably would not have chosen the neon lime yellow though. But they come in many colors and that is not the only good brand.

    The apps are extremely useful and if I am running now anyone can. There are also many resources, websites, apps for 7 minute workouts. If you have a time crunch you might want to look into those. They are intense, I haven't done them yet, but I might. But they get great reviews for being very useful.
  • Thank you all so much! This has definitley been helpful!! I think I will try the ease in to 5k, as I have a friend who wants me to run one with her in Feb. Thanks again!!!
  • You've gotten some amazing advice, but I just wanted to add: what your ex said to you was NOT appropriate. It is and was not his business nor his place to judge you.

    I know this sounds trite, but kick butt FOR YOU...not to prove anything to him.
  • A couple things:

    Eating Raw or drinking veggie/fruit juice (home made, not processed!) helps/helped me lose. You can Google Raw Food Diet or Juicing to see if it's for you. I use it to supplement my Real Food LOL, instead of sugar/carbs.

    You have to lose weight for you. Let's say June comes, you look great, then what? He'll either not notice it, ignore it, or say "WOW!" But the question will be the same. You are first, last, and always. You are Primary.