But I'm kind of getting what I call the 'first month body distortion' where I seemingly get fatter because suddenly I'm paying more attention to my body whereas before I was just ignoring it as much as possible.
I am back down to the weight I started the summer at and I'm quickly heading to the weight I was last year when I turned 21, which is very good.
The best part is I've been binge free 19 days and I have no intention of stopping! It really is this new WOE. I haven't been this comfortable around food in so long.
I do have some fears. It's still so early in the weight loss part. I've lost 20lbs before many times, and then just put it back on the. I think I'll breathe a sigh of relief when I've lost 30lbs and on because I haven't done that since I was 17. It'll mean something is really different this time, as if the newfound control around food and lack of binging wasn't enough of a sign!
I am generally very content these days. Three weeks ago I was panicking nearly every day. I'd either count calories all day and blow it at night or I'd just not count calories but I'd catch myself in a mirror or my jeans would be a little extra tight. I wasn't happy with myself either way.
I'm just really trying to stay focused. I'm afraid I'll become so blasé about it that I'll start slipping, but sugar and simple carbs have just become a no-no. I just don't eat them. If anyone asks I'll say I have an allergy. I'm done with them. Some people can't eat dairy without unpleasant repercussions and I can't eat bread or sugar without become obese. :P
But I'm happy, happier than I've ever been with food and my body. I just wanted to say I wouldn't have had the strength to give this new WOE my all if it weren't for all the wonderful people on 3FC!
