I'm finding that my thin friends have REALLY high expectations of the magical things weight loss is going to do for me. I mean pie in the sky dreams. They mean well, and they're excited for me, but, never having carried extra weight, they just don't get how it works.

I've been asked if I'm looking forward to wearing a bikini this summer. I will at the very least, have 60 more pounds to lose, and I just lose 115 in relatively short time. Holy pannus batman doesn't even begin to describe it. But she really thinks that I'll look like a commercial for Xenadrine by June 1.

My best friend is beyond frustrated that I can't shop at 'her stores' yet. She keeps buying me shirts from all these normal stores, and she keeps saying "How can you lose 100 pounds and still be plus size?" (Then of course she hears herself and sees me looking like I'm going to dive into a cookie jar and promptly apologizes, but she's still baffled.

I've had to explain "chub rub", why my hair is falling out, why my chin hair is coming in thicker.... the list goes on and on. And they all look at me in amazement, because they all think that weight loss=better. You take off the pounds and it's all awesomeness. They thought the moment I lost the first 50 I'd be hit on left right and center.

I can't wait until I tell them about "FUPA"

OMG Jane, FUPA!!

This time around I don't discuss my weightloss with anyone except all of you. Well, my husband yes, but not in the same detail as I do with all of you as he's a guy and thinks differently. Plus I never want to explain what FUPA or aprons or batwings are, maybe he won't notice them if I don't point them out!

My family knows my weightloss is not open for discussion as I can't take stress at the moment and they say very minimal (except that my dad did ask me if I was ok a couple of weeks ago...that made me feel a bit guilty as I had lost 100lbs since I had seen him last which was just after my cancer diagnosis!). Maybe I should have given him the heads up but weight has always been a touchy subject in my family, esp. since I am built like him but he's almost a foot taller!

In some ways the first 50lbs was magical as it slimmed me into my tight fitting clothes but it surely didn't change much, mentally or physically.

I think the good part about losing weight right now (except for the whole bathing suit fiasco today!) is the new fresh spring we are going to have. I started my serious mission over last summer so we have all been inside and bundled up under our sweaters and coats. I hope I have some kind of butterfly moment where I magically transform into a beautiful woman of Spring somehow.

RadioJane they love you and they think they are being helpful. Sometimes people don't get it! But consider yourself the lucky one! You must be looking very, very good and carry your weight well!
Great friends are a blessing, they just maybe don't get that there is a little pooch underneath our clothes that they can't see

Good Luck, Roo2

Or that you can go "back" to eating what you used to eat. They don't get the lifestyle change required.

I really don't have anything to add, lol...I just wanted to say I understand where you're coming from.

LOL I had to google FUPA. LOL Yeah, not something that I'd want to explain to my thin friends.

The chub rub is the one I hate having to explain. How do you say "No I don't have any jeans that I wore in high school because a) I'm 80lbs heavier than I was then and b) my thighs will eat through any fabric to get to each other

BTW, Elvislover - for bathing suits, check out the Catalina line at walmart. They are amazing. They take all of your squishiness and make it look like a pin-up model's curves. Its amazing. I bought the ruched halter one and it is by far the best bathing suit I have ever worn.

Thank you!!! I definitely will. And hopefully Walmart's price will allow me to buy 2 vs. ordering them at Lane Bryant or somewhere like that.

I too had to Google FUPA, I have only ever known that particular collection of fat as, excuse the term Gunt. And to tell you the truth that that is one of the biggest motivators for me. I have always been horrified that I will get one (I don't yet, thankfully most of my extras sticks to my belly and butt/thighs) I also have always worn my pants under my gut, a) because it was more comfortable, and b) I always secretly thought it would help prevent the FUPA, like my pants were the only thing keeping the fat from falling down there!!!

I hear you, sometimes the thin folks just don't get it. Any of it. Why don't you want to go to the beach? (um, because I feel like a beached whale...) What do you mean you can't snowboard anymore? (300 lbs + bad knees + ice and snow and feet strapped together = bad times) Are you ever going to eat "regular" food again, as they chow down on a big greasy pile of mcdonalds. (because my chicken and salads aren't "regular" food or anything.... sheesh)

And bunny, your comment about the thighs eating the fabric! GOLD! The crotch of my pants is the first thing to go!!! UGH!

Once someone asked me why I had zinc cream in my purse, since I didn't have a baby. I had to explain that it helps with the chub rub!! They just looked at me like I was crazy.

Also, I love it when my skinny friends try and give me diet advice. I have some friends who think this is the best plan for everyone... They skip breakfast, eat a microwave veggie pack for lunch and then get to eat whatever they want for supper (Read: That means picking up something from each fast food place on the way home) Genius!

I love this place, and all of you for understanding these things! For so long I was sure I was the only one with these kinds of problems!!!

I had to google FUPA as well! Hahahaha!!!

What is up with the facial hair thing? Anyone know what causes that? I'm hating it!

I really only discuss my weight loss with y'all here and even though my friends know I'm losing weight, the only time I hear anything from them is when I share I lost X amount and they congratulate me.

I get this one constantly. "aren't you looking forward to not getting up at 6am to work out?" No, not really because there's no end!


It's hormones. Your fat cells release all sorts of crap when you burn them off. Hormone fun!


Thanks everyone. I don't get down about any of it, I just think it's sort of funny! And Silverfire I think "gunt" is more commonly used in our neck of the woods, we're far too blunt for acronyms.

This too. I get told by EVERYONE to up my wine intake lately because it's the new superfood. Yes, I'm aware of what wine does for your health. No I'm not ready to sacrifice the calories yet. Or "It's easy, just eat less"

Yeah, your fat stores all sorts of hormones and its also the place in your body where you store toxins. Thats why sometimes while dieting you feel sluggish - its not always the calorie deficit (although if you aren't getting enough vitamins or are eating too little that could be part of the cause) but often cause losing weight is sort of taxing on the body - you have to process all sorts of junk.

Radiojane - if its any consolation, it sounds like your friend just thinks you look really good. Also sounds like she is at least trying to be supportive in her own way - as misguided as it is! Supportive friends are the best - sometimes we just have to educate them.

Regarding FUPA, I never even realized my vag away was fat until I saw the gyn about some dysfunction isues in the bedroom department. She told me the extra few inches of padding (I thought it was normal) wasn't helping. So now I'm all self conscious ... damn gyn.

You know what's funny? Just a couple of nights ago my husband made a comment that our sex life was soooo much better. I had been thinking the same thing. The only thing I could attribute it to was that I had lost 23 pounds! Perhaps when I lost weight buy not inches it was FUPA shrinkage??? LMAO!!!

Men have "FUPA" too .. so apparently weight loss makes them a little longer because less of it is buried in there .... Fun fact!

Your bedroom life could also be better because you are more confident and feeling good. And/or if you are healthier and working out, blood flows better!

Haha gunts and bunnyhugs. Yeah, we are an odd bunch round these parts lmao!

haha! Sometimes I wish beer was a superfood (In real life, not just my mind)... I mean, its already pretty super, and I have been known to consider it a food (Liquid bread! Amirite?!)