Comments from the Peanut Gallery
 

Has anyone else had any experience with people thinking they can share their opinions about you now that you've lost weight? After losing, my coworkers now think its ok to tell me that they think I should stop because I am too skinny. This comment is usually followed by, "Oh, I remember when I first met you and you were so chunky." or "I remember how big you used to be."

I know they mean it as a compliment to tell me how much healthier I look, but their comments still hit me funny. Even though I'm not in the same big body anymore, it doesn't mean I'm not the same person inside. Not to mention, since when is it ok to share your unsolicited advice on someone else's weight?

At 160, I feel better than I did at 220, but I haven't reached my goal and I'm not finished. Sorry to vent, but it's difficult to hear day in and day out about how you are getting "too skinny" when they know you are not done yet. Plus, it really messes with your head as you continue to work so hard to meet goal.

Just remember, they mean well. They feel they must mention it, but haven't got a clue what to say. Don't let it get to you. You are doing well. Hang in there and do what feels right to you.

Just ignore them! I know it is not as easy as it sounds but most likely they are either trying to reassure you that you look beautiful and not take your weight loss to far and there is probably a huge amount of unconscious jealousy (or if they are already thin afraid that you will take attention away from them).

If someone ever makes inappropriate comments about my weight, I always laugh (important since I don't want to come across as the rude one!!!) and look at them with kind of an incredulous "I can't believe you said that" type look on my face and say "You're getting kind of personal, aren't you?" and don't say any more about it. It works! :)

This sounds like the same people who like to give you advice on how to have your wedding, how to be pregnant, and how to take care of your baby....all just busybodies who feel like they are the guru's of everything.

Pay them no mind, some people just exist to give others 'advice'.

YES.

In fact, an obese family member accused me of being a "junkie" (crackhead) and an anorexic. She even threatened to report me to adult protective services to have me put somewhere for "help". It was an idle threat; she never did any such thing because she knew she was full of sh*t. This person never congratulated me for my 90+ pound weight loss. My accomplishment was never acknowledged. I was just told, over and over, how "terrible" I look. I have a very large collarbone; it protrudes even when I'm fairly chunky, but she used that as "proof" that I was "starving myself".

This person weighs close to 300 lbs. This person was my mother. This person has been disowned.

Awkward.

My mum can be a bit like that. She used to feed me way too much as a kid.

I am coaching her now on how I need to lose weight. I think she gets it. I was close to 280lbs, have high BP and bad cholestoral. At age 38! So I hope she will value my efforts when she comes to visit next week. Else I'll be in a grave before she is. That's the bottom line.

Like I said, awkward.

Yep. It has to be that way. It may sound selfish but, to quote a Bon Jovi song, it's my life. :)

My brother was giving me unsolicited advice today on what to do when I'm in the weight room. Most people on here that have gotten to know me know that my biggest problem area right now is my arms, and my brother would NOT stop going on about how I needed to work on my arms! And then when I showed him my arm, full of muscle with a nice batwing of loose-skin hanging from it and said, "I don't think there's much I can do about that sans surgery", he said, "Well maybe you should start looking into that..." And looked at me weird when I said I didn't think I needed surgery.

People make unnecessary comments and focus on unnecessary things all the time. Like, I'm pretty sure my brother was just trying to help, but I feel like he was just indirectly trying to tell me my arms looked gross. You just gotta ignore those people and carry on with what you're doing, otherwise they'll drive you nuts and you'll be miserable. Nobody wants to be miserable!

Not really.

What's awkward is being abused for years; physically, emotionally and verbally...and being treated like the "crazy one" by ignorant outsiders. What's even more awkward? Your mother punching you with closed fists. :)

It definitely works! The laughter is key, though, to not coming off snotty and self-defensive.

My peanut gallery loves to give me "tips" about nutrition/fitness/whatever they hear on tv & it drives me nuts. I get asked "What are you doing to lose weight?" which is nearly always followed by "Well, So-&-So that I work with lost by doing this & that," or "I've heard that you should just do this...." "A lady I know got put on such & such diet by her dr & has lost eleventy million lbs." My grandmother, especially, loves to tell me everything she has seen on tv about weight loss. "They say this & that & blah blah blah to lose weight." "You should do this more & eat less of that & then you'll see the weight really fall off."

Oh, my favorite comment is "You're doing well, keep it up!" Which I'm sure is an attempt to be supportive but, when it comes from others not working on their own weight loss, it's just condescending. Like I somehow need the approval of those who don't need to lose weight....


Can you tell I'm a bit moody today?

:rofl::rofl:

Thank you, Keep Moving, I needed a laugh and this cracked me up.

I'm with Misti -- just handle it with good grace and then move on. Who knows what is going through people's minds who think that it's appropriate to tell you what you should weigh, etc. I had one lady one time who just wouldn't take the hint, including when I walked away from her while she was in mid-advice session. Finally, I turned to her and I did manage to smile, but said that since she thinks my weight loss is an appropriate topic, how about we move on to our sex lives and you can go first. That did finally shut her up, but I felt badly about being so obnoxious all day.