Short term goals: think big or something conservative?
 

Some times I see people have what seem to me to be unrealistic goals, like losing 25 lbs in 5 weeks. I mean, sure, most of us would like to do that, but I think that we also know that most of the time, that's not usually that realistic.

Personally, I tend to pick time based goals on the fairly conservative side - so even if I know I'm averaging 2 lbs a week, I'll make my goal about 1.5 lbs a week. That's to give a cushion in case I stall a bit, but also because I tend to prefer to meet or even exceed a goal rather than fall short.

But then I wonder whether I'm challenging myself enough. Maybe I would do better if I made the goal something that I had to work harder to try to achieve? Of course, there is no guarantee that harder work necessarily turns into a bigger loss on the scale....

If you set short term, time-based goals, how do you decide on them? And how do you feel if you fail to achieve them?

I'm probably queen of the unrealistic goals. When I started out I was going to be at 100 pounds loss by Christmas. Didn't happen. So then I just set a goal of going a month without cheating. After a big "woosh" in January, I aimed to be under 300 pounds by April 1, but then I stalled out for about two weeks, so the likelihood of making that happen is less.

I've found though that I tend to make a super ambitious goal, and then mentally, I give myself a bit of a break. It's hugely important to me to get under 300 (294 would be even better, it gets me out of "morbid obesity"), and while April 1 would be a fantastic time frame, I tell myself that if I do it by my sister in law's shower (May 4th) then I'm still ahead of the game. And I'll probably fall somewhere in the middle. But if I put it down on paper that I had an extra 34 days, then I'd be afraid I wouldn't work as hard. Quite frankly, if it hadn't been for all these darn weddings this summer, I probably wouldn't have busted my butt as much as I have.

As my mom says "A man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a heaven for?".

I failed my first time dependent goal. Gave up on making time dependent goals, then I decided to make one specifically for my birthday. It doesn't look like I'll make it, but I'm busting my butt trying.
If I don't make goal by my birthday I will be deviated :-(

I made my goal of 199 solely on the fact that it was literally impossible for me to imagine ever being in the 100s again, nevermind able to get to 275, 250, etc. I never put a time limit on it as I never expected this to happen. It ended up taking me about 7 months to lose 100lbs.

199 was a number pulled from the stars and heavens assuming if I get there, it would be nothing short of a miracle.

So I hope you all believe in miracles as I am slowly closing in on it.

I am a little superstitious and don't want to change my ticker to my new goal after that but I am throwing numbers around in my head. I think I might make my new goal 185 or even 175 which will be surreal to me. But if I had seen "153lbs to go" on the ticker when I started I could never have succeeded, it would have been too overwhelming.

I tried time related goals before and I just put too much pressure on myself. I'm not as good as others are under pressure.

Now I try to set achievement goals, like remembering to eat smaller meals and taking an eating break before I go for seconds. Before I would load up my plate and immediately go for 2nds because it tasted good.

I made time based goals but always made them something achievable. They were usually a goal for a particular calendar month, doable if I remained on plan, not doable if I didn't remain disciplined.

But I also never freaked out if I remained on plan but didn't reach a particular goal. As long as I knew that I hadn't cheated myself out of success, that was all that mattered. If I worked hard, then what I got was what I got and it was good enough.

I tend to think that those who post with completely unrealistic goals also tend to jump on all the new diet fads, pills and cleanses and then fade away and don't post anymore when they find that it really all comes down to discipline, hard work and staying power.

I think for ultimate final goals, you should set the bar relatively high. However, you don't know how long it will take. For goals that are a particular amount of time, I think you should be conservative so you don't set yourself for failure. I also like the idea of goals that are action oriented rather than result oriented because we can't alawys control how our fat cells behave. Example: Workout 4 days a week for 4 weeks straight. Stay OP for 30 days straight.

I feel too much pressure with time related goals as well. It kind of makes me feel like I'm failing even though I'm making progress.

I've found I like to have a main "big picture" goal in mind, but a bunch of mini goals along the way. Lately, the mini goal that has made me feel the best is to stay on plan for the day, or for a string of days. Each night that I climb into bed is a little victory - no scale required!

I agree with mandypandy2246. You can be doing everything "right" and still reach a plateau, or just lose more slowly than you expect sometimes. It's just not 100% under your control in that sense. I aim more for behavioral goals, which I can control (hypothetically, anyway!).

Every time I've set a monthly (or longer) goal, I've never hit it right on. Maybe it's because I don't have much weight left to lose at this point, but the losses are pretty dang erratic for me. I'll lose a bunch at once, then nothing for a very long time.

Hmmm, my only goal was ever to not go off plan.

I often give myself HUGE goals - like, borderline insanity huge. Personally, if I reach a goal early I take that as permission to go off plan and eat whatever I want until my goal date. A 'hey, you're already at goal, now you can use the extra five days to celebrate!' free-for-all. I'm not disappointed when I don't reach my huge goals, since I've always lost something, so for me it's better to shoot higher than I can actually achieve - it motivates me to keep working hard to get as close to goal as humanly possible.

I also give myself uber-conservative time related goals. Like when I was losing 1.5lbs a week regularly, I'd estimate a goal at a rate of 1 lb a week so that I was setting myself up to succeed. Or like last year I gave myself 3 months to lose a final (I think) 10 lbs... I totally failed at that but it wasn't that the goal was unrealistic, it was more that I slacked off way too much, to be honest.

I like fail-proof type short-term goals so I can feel like a winner and like I'm making progress.

I set conservative time based goals and then after i've hit them consistently for a few weeks, I increase them a little with the caveat that if the new goal isn't working out for me, I'll back it back down to something more livable.

However, the scale based goals are more like milestones for me to mark my progress. If I don't hit them, I don't worry about them, as long as I am hitting my action based goals.

If I've done everything or most everything I set out to do and the scale doesn't co-operate, I'm satisfied with my progress.

Some of my long term goals are a bit more out there, but as I get closer to them and it's easier to judge how feasible they are, I'll make adjustments.

My short goal is to be in the 190's by the end of June, which was totally doable if I could lose 10 lbs a month. But I haven't lost anything going on two weeks now :( So I'm starting to see that that probably won't happen as my body apparently hates me too much the two weeks before my TOM. It'll drop when it comes, but it's never that much really, a lb or two at most if I'm lucky.

That was my short term goal, 10 lbs a month. Long term was goal by Thanksgiving, but I think pushing it back to Christmas/New Years might be more feasible!

I've started walking in the afternoons so I'm hoping some exercise will help move things along!

If it is time dependent and less than 8 weeks, I usually stick with the 1-1.5lb a week range. If it's a time dependent goal larger than that, then usually I will aim a little higher. I don't mind adjusting my final goal if necessary for the larger time gaps, but for a month to two months, I try to aim low and then if I go well past my goal I feel proud!

I try to make all my goals realistic, but sometimes life and my body don't cooperate.

My first goal that I gave myself in January 2011 was to get to 175 by my birthday, Dec. 10th, 2011. That would be 100 pounds down from my highest, 80 pounds down from my current and my lightest adult weight ever. HOWEVER, that was the ideal goal. I would have been satisfied with 50 pounds and to work on the rest later. It just happened that a week before my birthday I got to 175.

Well, now I sit here at 185 ish. I gave myself ONE YEAR to get from 175 to 155 (my end goal initially). Should be easy, right? Gee whiz! I got down to 165 in April and then up to 170 in May. Then I was 172 ish when we went on vacation, up to 190, down to 170 up to 197. I was all over the place!

So, the beginning of this year, hoping a large part of my recent weight gain was water, I hoped to get to 175 by March 9th. Well, not much was water weight. I now will be happy to get to 180 by March 9th.

It doesn't hurt me mentally as I don't really feel I'm in a race and I'm not in danger of quitting because of not meeting my goals as quickly as I hope, but those goals do help me. When I had something solid to work towards, I moved toward it closer. When the goal was more nebulous, I wasn't as committed to it.

My goal IS to be at 165ish-170ish by June 1st. And then we'll just work on fitness (some more) from there.

Time goals are unrealistic and often lead us to give up altogether. Better than setting a goal to lose a certain amount by a certain date, is to set a goal to incorporate a lifestyle change that is supportive of your weight loss efforts, ie to eat fruits and/or vegetables with every meal or snack, to always have a healthy snack with you when you go out of the house (this means fruits and vegetables, string cheese, etc.), to exercise a certain amount 6 days a week, to keep a food journal, etc.

Goals, types of goals, weight goals, time goals, realistic goals, unrealistic goals. . . it all depends on the person IMO.

Of course HUGE crazy goals can have the potential to discourage a person if they don't reach it. I've gone every route possible in goal setting. Short term, long term, conservative, crazy. I need a focus, sometimes I need several different goals to keep me on track.

Goals are very personal. Some people need a crazy unrealistic goal just to get the fire under them burning. Some people just need to focus on that 1 pound at a time no matter how much time it takes.

If a person wants to give up, they will find any excuse; reaching a goal can derail someone just as fast as not reaching one. I've lived both!

So true!

Goals are mind games I play with myself to keep me going. So, I have my "real" goals and my "secret" goals. The first are usually about 1 to 1.5lbs per week and very attainable and less specific - I'd like to be at goal before my birthday (June and not sure exactly what "goal" is right now - is that a little over 3 months to lose 20lbs or 10? I don't know? Would anytime in June count, sure?) The second are usually more specific, less realistic and more event oriented - I need to lose 10lbs before I go on vacation so I can wear that bathing suit!! or I want to be at goal for a concert in May so I can look smokin' hot in the outfit I have planned. Yeah, the 10lbs didn't happen, but I have lost 5 and will look okay in the alternate bathing suit I have planned.

And then I have my fitness goals which are actually more important to me. I think those are going to be the ones that will keep me on track after maintenance. The race ones are time oriented - I've gotten my eyes too big a couple times and signed up for a race and couldn't go because I wasn't ready. That hurt. I want to build up my general running ability so I'm not trying to get in shape for the race, but just need to expand my distance. Other than that, I just have the goal to constantly improve.

It's funny, I keep reading all of these replies and nodding my head and thinking yep, I agree. But I think that about all of them, even though not everyone is posting the same thing! lol! So I guess I really am all over the place with this.

Aim high, it's a good motivator. Aim lower, but get the sense of accomplishment from doing even better. Focus on non-scale things that are in our control. Use the scale as a tool to push just that little bit harder. Aim big but don't get discouraged if you don't quite make it. Don't use meeting a goal as permission to slack off.

A lot that is contradictory, but it's all true!

I think it really depends on your personality. For me, i do way better if i aim low. Even when i exercise--even when i KNOW i can run x number of miles--i tell myself "ok i'm just going to go out there--do the best i can--if it's 1 mile it's ok, if it's 8 then even better." I now apply the same approach with food. My daily calorie limit is 1900--much higher than most people here, but it is an easy goal i know i can achieve. I do way better this way than giving myself a very restrictive plan. I may be losing slowly, but i am losing.

and p.s. i don't do weight goals at all. I don't set "goals" for something that is out of my control. I can 100% control what goes in my mouth. The rest is up to the laws of physics.

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I like to set big goals in whatever I do. I hate to see someone not even consider something possible and try because it just seems so out of reach for them.

It took Thomas Edison over 1000 tries before getting the light bulb to work. Each "failure" taught him something he needed to know to reach his end goal.

Like we see here so many times, that it's about "commitment and not motivation" rings true in regards to goals. No matter if your goal is large or small, make a commitment to see it through, regardless of how long it takes.

I'm trying to focus on behavioral/activity based goals--calorie goals, walking goals, logging goals, planning goals--things that I can do and hold myself accountable for.

I daydream about meeting various weight loss date goals (a big event I have coming up, my nephew's bar mitzvah) but as long as I'm meeting all of my behavior goals, I know I'm doing what I need to do--and I'll get to the weight loss goals when I get to them. (If I tell myself this enough times I might start to believe it.)

I agree about behaviour-based goals. Granted, I don't weigh myself but I never made a weight-loss specific goal. I just never saw the point. If you lost 13 pounds in 2 months instead of 15 pounds, did you really fail?

I'm in maintenance. When I look back at the goals I met or the achievements I earned, I don't say to myself, "Wow, I lost this amount of weight this quickly! I'm so proud of myself!" I look at the half marathon I completed. Or not pigging out during one night out with buddies. Or eating that one slice of cake and not more.