Holiday Overindulging
 

I really, really wanted to eat some shortbread cookies. But I was not hungry. I had a healthy breakfast of an egg, buckwheat bread, laughing cow, onion slices and coffee. So why? Just because they taste good? I don't think so. I decided to read the postings of a therapist. I read her blogs regularly and they often help me. I am sharing this and then what happened about the cookies.

Over-indulging on the holidays isn't inevitable. All it takes is some consciousness to see that when we overeat excessively during this season what we're trying to do is fill the gap between what we'd hoped for & what is. The happy family, close friends, loving partner & precious children we want may not exist in the way that we wish, and the combination of our disappointment and masses of rich food is too compelling. If we were to acknowledge our sadness, our losses & our loneliness, we'd be far less tempted to overdo it with the sweets and the treats. We can use this powerfully charged time to finally face the dissatisfaction we feel with our lives. We can choose to deal with the relationships that are lacking or unsatisfying & rather than stuffing down our feelings with holiday food, we can address our real needs. In this way, we'll avoid piling on the pounds & we'll have the chance to create more love & happiness for ourselves in the coming year.
Dr. Sirota


I reflected on this and then went and did a visualisation. I did not want the cookies anymore. As a matter of fact I know that I am trying to heal wounds from childhood. My parents were not as loving as they should have been. It happens. I can't heal with food. Slowly I am learning.

I hope this helps someone on the board from overindulging to heal wounds that will never be healed with food.

Take care.

Very good reading this morning, Plucky Pear! Good for you for handling your food & feelings in the best way.

Your meal sounds delicious.

As usual i overindulged during these days. And of course i did it because of emotional problems (and more), and of course i don't want to face them, and of course food helps me through :( The post from the blog is very good....

I have been so surprised, and disappointed by how crappy everything tastes. The kids helped me make five different types of cookies. The lemon ones tasted good for a minute while they were warm, but I must have taken ten bites of cookies over the last few days, only to spit it out and throw the rest away, because it was dry and really just not yummy like I "remembered" from years past.

I've been finding this a lot with food in general. Most of it is just crap. Lol restaurants and anything pre made if such low quality that it doesn't even taste good. I find myself thinking a lot like another member on here who really only indulges on really, really good food. Since thatis often expensive or very time consuming to make, it really is a special treat.

But....I'm still oddly upset that the gingerbread loaf wasn't good today. But I surely did a number on the cinnamon swirl French toast and real bacon I made this morning. ;)

Interesting perspective

i overindulge in food because i love to eat and food tastes good LOL...i admire the people who can look deeper into themselves for a more profound reason and overcome that...i just love food and love feeling full

so i work with that...i make sure that i eat what i really REALLY want, not just crappy stuff that's in front of me, and to eat when i'm really hungry, and try not to eat too much...and to pick what i want to eat...for example, i'm passing up the cheap christmas chocolates in favor of eating more of a homemade old-fashioned dessert that i made for dinner tonight

and i work out....i worked out yesterday and will work out tomorrow

Alaska Good job on working out. :) I worked out yesterday but nothing planned until Friday.

Originally Posted by ChickieChicks:
I have been so surprised, and disappointed by how crappy everything tastes. ....just not yummy like I "remembered" from years past.

I've been finding this a lot with food in general. Most of it is just crap.

Me too! I've been experiencing the same thing, lately. Not with everything, and not all the time, but more often, with more foods. This makes me happy.

I still eat because it's good, not because I'm hungry. I still eat even though I'm full. I don't think I over eat at holidays to fill a void. I do it because the food is good and it's there. This is not to say I don't still eat my feelings. I'm still working on that.

Overall, however, I'm noticing a change in what I eat, how I eat, when I eat, my appetite and so on. It's such a welcome change!

I can not believe how much my taste buds have changed since increasing my intake of veggies, lean proteins and healthy fats.

I was looking forward to eating the desserts we have every year. I only ate a very small piece of cake and 2 small cookies - I couldn't eat anymore sweets after that. I didn't want any juice or alcohol, I just wanted water. When I looked at my plate there were a ton of veggies and not so much meat and starchy food.

I did enjoy my weekly cheat meal on Saturday so maybe my body was satisfied, but I still can not get over how I look at food differently. It was a longgggg road to get here but I am thrilled to get to this point!

Well I'm just at the beginning of my journey, but am at my parent for a few weeks with the kids . . food, snacks, sweets everywhere . . .and I have caved in . . . the last two days have been just crazy eating for me, no self-control . . . starting again to eat healthy tomorrow.

I've become pickier over the years, and will also shun cheap 'industrial' Xmas goods in favour of homemade food and treats. For instance, this is the only time of the year when I get to eat game, nicely cooked by my mother, so I was certainly not about to ditch it; on the other hand, while we had a very rich lunch yesterday, I didn't have breakfast (ate too late on the 24th/not hungry) nor dinner (still not hungry XD). I guess it's all going to even out in the end.

I used to be convinced that I was filling an emotional void with food, but now I'm not so sure anymore. Our Christmases here are quite depressing in a way (good food, alright, only the whole atmosphere is 'off' because of all the money problems underlying everything, and things clearly not being as sweet as they were even some 10 years ago :(); still, I haven't felt like overeating because of that (I sleep in the same toom as 20 boxes of cookies and other pastries, and I haven't even sneak-eaten anything). So I don't know.

But then, I've also been watching my weight for years, basically nipping every gain in the bud because I'm way too lazy to be dieting again; I think I'm now used to 'naturally' balance out over-indulging with days-after when I barely eat, simply because I'm not hungry yet. I probably wouldn't have been able to manage things like that some 5 or 6 years ago.

Originally Posted by alaskanlaughter:
i overindulge in food because i love to eat and food tastes good LOL...i admire the people who can look deeper into themselves for a more profound reason and overcome that...i just love food and love feeling full.

Same here. I didn't plan on overindulging at Christmas dinner last night, but I did. There was just too much good food around! New day, new resolve. I'm off to the gym later this morning to work some of it off.

F.

I overeat simply because I like food and it tastes good... and it has been a terrible habit. I am sure there are some people who do it because of emotional issues, etc. but that is not the case for some of us. For me it is just a matter of not giving in to the bad habits I have developed and eating just because I like it.

And I too am finding that, after eating healthful foods for so long, the junk and processed garbage just no longer tastes good. Now it just tastes like the chemicals, sugar, salt and fat that it is filled with. I simply stayed on plan during the Thanksgiving and Christmas season and am so glad I did. Overeating is just not worth the price I pay for it.

Originally Posted by Misti in Seattle:

And I too am finding that, after eating healthful foods for so long, the junk and processed garbage just no longer tastes good. Now it just tastes like the chemicals, sugar, salt and fat that it is filled with. I simply stayed on plan during the Thanksgiving and Christmas season and am so glad I did. Overeating is just not worth the price I pay for it.

Same here, but I have an added twist of feeling physically ill from the stuff. My fiancé bought a chocolate peanut butter cake over and I had a bite! Just a bite! That night I felt horrible. My stomach hurt, I had a splitting headache and I just felt crappy. Never again. I'm sticking with the stuff I made or fruit.

The night before I had apple pie and some honey balls, all that my mother and I made. I was fine. Last night I had a pear for dessert. Also fine. That dang cake did me in the other night!

I've been up early this morning, nursing lemon-ginger tea and hoping the burning aching stomach pains that woke me up will subside. Usually some tomato+spicy+coffee+travel or other stress combo is what sets it off, but I'm pretty sure this horrendous pain was triggered by simply overeating too much rich food. :o

I don't regret the homemade indulgences I had yesterday from a calorie standpoint, but yikes, I've definitely got buyer's remorse for what I've put my poor tummy through!

I'm not sure I was eating to fill a void, even though I've definitely been battling complex, painful feelings over choosing to spend the holidays away from dysfunctional extended family. While I think I don't put a huge value on Christmas, my family always has - and celebrated with far too much food! Cultural upbringing just runs so deep sometimes. For me, Christmas Day itself is one day for splurges and decadences. When it's really just one day and not a month, I'm not sure that's such a bad attitude to have.

But then again, my stomach... ! :-/

Originally Posted by twinieten:
Me too! I've been experiencing the same thing, lately. Not with everything, and not all the time, but more often, with more foods. This makes me happy.

I still eat because it's good, not because I'm hungry. I still eat even though I'm full. I don't think I over eat at holidays to fill a void. I do it because the food is good and it's there. This is not to say I don't still eat my feelings. I'm still working on that.

Overall, however, I'm noticing a change in what I eat, how I eat, when I eat, my appetite and so on. It's such a welcome change!

Same here!!

I know for a fact I use food to heal my wounds. I am trying not to do that, but it's a work in progress. But this time of year it's just because everything tastes so good, and because these foods are only around once a year!

But, I am noticing a change in my eating. I haven't had as much of the sweets as I usually do. Some of the food I use to love just doesn't taste the same, and that's a good thing! I haven't been eating as horribly as I usually do, but I am still craving some healthy food!

Turkey dinner yesterday was more than I should have had. But my plate was also half full of veggies! I thoroughly enjoyed the meal, had a small second helping, and didn't regret a bite of it! Dessert actually was a wrong choice though. Should have skipped it. Wasn't 'good' and to me a waste of calories.

I now sit with leftovers, cookies, squares, chips, chocolates, etc, and have no desire to eat any of them!

I love this new relationship with food!

The one thing I learned these last few days... Is that it doesn't take much for me to really bump up the scale with water weight from just a couple of dinners out, maybe a cocktail here, or a couple of glasses of wine there, a few hors d'oeuvres here and there, maybe just a few bites of dessert... And overnight there it is on the scale... Now I know I didn't gain all that fat overnight... But to be honest, it's not leaving me feeling very motivated to say the least... And even though my rational mind knows that it will be gone in a few days once I get back on track... and of course I've done it before... Those few days of getting back on track aren't easy, so it really has me questioning whether or not what I consider just a few "little" indulgences are worth it to me anymore...

found a good way to eat less at family gatherings!
 

So my husband and I went to his mother's house Christmas morning, and she had some tamales, rice, and beans for us for breakfast. Of which, I had one tamale, a little rice, and a little bit of beans...but my hubby piled his plate up as usual. Long story short, his son and his girlfriend sat together and shared off of one plate, and when the hubby and I went to my mom's for Christmas dinner he wanted to do the same thing. SO - I put enough food for two on one plate, and while I was eating in between visiting, he ate most of it! That kept me from eating very much! :D. I probably had a few bites of the homemade gratin potatoes, a small slice of ham, and a few bites of green bean casserole. Oh, and a sourdough roll. PERIOD. AND it was enough! I also had one little bite of the pecan pie we shared. I think I'll do that from now on :spin: Of course, that doesn't work with WINE :hat:

Originally Posted by TripSwitch:
Those few days of getting back on track aren't easy, so it really has me questioning whether or not what I consider just a few "little" indulgences are worth it to me anymore...

Love this Trip. All the hard work at the gym,on the track..to get back is not easy.But I'm learning that I can't even get started w/some indulgences cause they lead to more and then I've lost control for the whole day.

Originally Posted by SunnySide99:
I can not believe how much my taste buds have changed since increasing my intake of veggies, lean proteins and healthy fats.

I was looking forward to eating the desserts we have every year. I only ate a very small piece of cake and 2 small cookies - I couldn't eat anymore sweets after that. I didn't want any juice or alcohol, I just wanted water. When I looked at my plate there were a ton of veggies and not so much meat and starchy food.

My taste buds havnt changed but my appetite has. Only a month ago I could eat two big meals and snack all day. Now I did not count calories yesterday but I was so uncomfortable after dinner that I didn't want dessert. I was actually in pain from what I could have easily eaten before. I know I went way off plan, but my body wouldn't let me go crazy.

Plucky pear--good for you for looking deeper. I eat emotionally sometimes but this was not one of these times. I was just enjoying myself and wanted to enhance that with food. But I do respect your soul searching.

Originally Posted by sontaikle:
Same here, but I have an added twist of feeling physically ill from the stuff. My fiancé bought a chocolate peanut butter cake over and I had a bite! Just a bite! That night I felt horrible. My stomach hurt, I had a splitting headache and I just felt crappy. Never again. I'm sticking with the stuff I made or fruit.

Me too. The butter tarts I was so looking forward to were just WAY too sweet and made me feel sick. Neighbor brought over some spinach dip and it gave me the WORST stomach grossness. I just want my raw kale salads and water!

Thanks for posting the exerpt from the therapist's blog. I find I eat foods I don't really want to eat because of that very reason, during Christmas and always. Not so much anymore though, now that I have identified it...

Originally Posted by alaskanlaughter:
i overindulge in food because i love to eat and food tastes good LOL...i admire the people who can look deeper into themselves for a more profound reason and overcome that...i just love food and love feeling full

so i work with that...i make sure that i eat what i really REALLY want, not just crappy stuff that's in front of me, and to eat when i'm really hungry, and try not to eat too much...and to pick what i want to eat...for example, i'm passing up the cheap christmas chocolates in favor of eating more of a homemade old-fashioned dessert that i made for dinner tonight

and i work out....i worked out yesterday and will work out tomorrow

wow! I could have written every single word myself!! I love to hear others admit that besides loving the taste of food, they also love the full feeling. Takes honesty!

I do applaud the OP for being able to reflect and make a great choice :carrot:

I don't think I eat to fill a void at Christmas, if I eat emotionally it's to reclaim a memory. Many of the foods I crave bring back a specific feeling, or sometimes a specific memory - rolls like grandma used to make, or holiday sweets we'd only have at a party, they're all things that remind me of the magic that Christmas was when I was little. Maybe I can think of some ways to remember those times differently, telling stories or playing games with my kids or something.

Originally Posted by TripSwitch:
The one thing I learned these last few days... Is that it doesn't take much for me to really bump up the scale with water weight...... Those few days of getting back on track aren't easy, so it really has me questioning whether or not what I consider just a few "little" indulgences are worth it to me anymore...

I'm with you on that one! While losing weight, I was increasingly frustrated with scale movements due to little indulgences. I felt like I was spinning my wheels and going nowhere. I didn't feel like it was worth it, and had to reign myself in a few times. I never want to deprive myself, but I also feel like the regular set backs aren't very helpful, even if the gains are not "real".

I agree that there are ways to avoid holiday indulgences, but I also believe that no one is overweight because of holiday indulgences (unless for you, every day is a holiday).

I did better this year than most in terms of avoiding the holiday "crap," and yet I did eat signficantly more than I planned, and I don't feel bad about it in the least. I enjoyed myself. I ate a few foods that I don't buy or keep myself because of the temptation factor, and now that it's over, I'm back to my normal routine.

I got home and stepped on the scale and was shocked to see a 12 lb gain - until I remembered that I was also lucky enough to start my period the day before. I ALWAYS gain 8 - 10 lbs with my period, so we'll see how much gain I really have in a few days.

The thing is, even if it was a full 12 lbs, I wouldn't be sad, horrified, or upset. In fact, I wouldn't feel or do anything differently. In the scheme of things, what I eat at Easter, Thanksgiving, my birthday and the week of Christmas (the major "food" holidays in my family) has very little to do with me weight issues. It's the other 354 days that matter the most.

Originally Posted by Misti in Seattle:
I overeat simply because I like food and it tastes good...

I really relate to this.

I certainly do have emotions & food does make me feel better, but in the main I just love to eat.

For years I was influenced by a few specific people I knew online & off who were into the emotional side of why they ate too much for the weight they desired. It is actually only recently that I have been able to mentally remove that influence & openly say that my biggest problems weight wise have been love of food & a tendency to be influenced by others instead of listening to the inner weight management guru that DID despite all else, help me lose more than 100 pounds & keep it off for a long time.

I overdid it a bit this Christmas but I didn't eat anything I didn't really enjoy, so I don't really feel bad about that. I think having Pepperidge Farm chocolate cake (I have had it every year for my 12/24 birthday for 10+ years) and my mom's banana bread once a year is hardly something worth wasting time feeling guilty about.

Nice to see so many postings.

I know plenty of people who love food and the way it tastes, yet they are not overweight. They are physically healthy. I am convinced having an unhealthy relationship with food is what causes being overweight. As a matter of fact one can be addicted to food, thin, yet unhealthy. They may simply chain themselves by obsessing about every bite.
Some of us simply learned bad habits, numbing etc. With food. I learned this I did not discover it on my own. However some may disagree, that is fine. I just wanted to share what is helping me.

I did have some treats but did not binge. I lost weight.

I could say I will never eat such and such but many healthy people have a cookie now and then. I guess for me the sign of being able to have a cookie now and then, rather then obsessing and having 20 or obsessing and saying I will never have 1, is a sign of health, emotional health. I am working on it and really thankful for those of you that are supportive. I can always come here for that. Thanks.

There is some amazing insight in this thread.


I overdid it this Christmas. And it's the 28th and I haven't been back to the gym yet. I haven't been on the scale, but my jeans feel tight and I've already cheated today. But I'm not going to beat myself up about it.

I started changing my life on the first of August, so I'm less than six months into this journey. And while I may have eaten too much at Christmas, I am proud to say that there is a 12 pack of coca cola that's been in my house for two weeks and is only missing one. I also haven't touched the oreos I bought to make truffles for my nephews at new years. I haven't scooped the brownies out of the pan with my fingers this year. And I'm not sitting looking at the calendar going "I have to change this New years" because I HAVE changed. I've lost more than 60 lbs. I've made water my friend. And I won't have any issue getting back in the pool tomorrow or getting my water in.

I may have lost the Christmas battle, but I've won the diet war.

Yeah Radiojane! :) I was in the pool today.