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-   -   Reached a bump and failed, but I want to succeed (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/weight-loss-support/271349-reached-bump-failed-but-i-want-succeed.html)

junkatarian 12-10-2012 07:47 PM

Reached a bump and failed, but I want to succeed
 
I had lost weight leading up to Thanksgiving. But the week before the holiday and week of the holiday I gained back pretty much the couple pounds that I lost. That felt so disheartening. Ever since then I have been eating a lot out of a sense of another failure. I know what I need to do to lose weight but sometimes I just don't feel like I have what it takes emotionally to make it through the challenging times when difficult emotions set in, emotions I usually cope with with food. But I truly want to succeed. I know there has to be a better way.

Misti in Seattle 12-10-2012 08:08 PM

Hi and :welcome:

You have come to the right place for support and encouragement. We are all in this together.

I hope you will look around the forum and jump right in where you feel comfortable.

Desert Dweller 12-10-2012 08:13 PM

Hi,
You have to change your thinking. You didn't fail, you gave up because you thought you failed. You need to change your frame of reference. I am assuming that when you lose whatever weight you plan to lose, you want to keep it off?? In which case the two pounds you lost and gained are almost irrelevant if you make your time frame be your lifetime.
There are always going to be times when we don't eat in accordance with our goals but you need to realise that it doesn't mean you failed. It means you had a moment where you indulged but now the indulgence needs to end and you'll get back to healthy eating..
There is nothing worse then going on an eating bender after eating one chocolate bar because you think you ruined it.. You didn't ruin anything. You indulged when you shouldn't have, but that's in the past just get back to what really matters, healthy eating and exercise.
It's time to realise that there was a series of bad choices that lead to your weight gain (well that's true for me anyway), so your weight gain did not come on in one day or one week.. So the same goes for losing it, make more good choices then bad ones, do some exercise, have some fun and the weight will come off. When you gave a bad eating day or week, recognise it, leave the judgement at the door and keep on with your healthy life.. Nothing is ruined!
Keep your head high, go for a walk, have a healthy lunch and go from there.

freelancemomma 12-10-2012 10:17 PM

I agree with everything in the above post except I would amend "you indulged when you shouldn't have" to simply "you indulged." I don't think there are any shoulds in the weight-loss game, just choices. Different choices lead to different outcomes, and it's up to each of us to to make the call. It may sound like a nitpicky distinction, but I think the word "should" brings out the inner rebel/demon in at least some of us.

F.

Lemongrab 12-10-2012 10:22 PM

Good thread. I have this problem too.

shcirerf 12-10-2012 10:41 PM

I overate a bit on Thanksgiving, and my scale was up for a couple days.

However, the next day, I got right back on plan and in a few days the gain disappeared. It was mostly from all the salt and processed food.

Look, life happens. What we need to do is look at things as feed back and not failure.

None of us are perfect and not every day is perfect. Just strive for the good days, and write off the bad and saddle up again in the morning!:carrot::hug::D

luckymommy 12-10-2012 10:53 PM

I saw a quote on here somewhere that said something to this effect: It's not how many times you fall, but how many times you pick yourself back up. I really like that because it underscores the fact that we do fall and that we shouldn't just give in. Someone else put it this way: if you're climbing a mountain, and your foot slips a bit, do you just throw yourself off the mountain? No, you don't. Same thing applies to weight loss.

Rather than looking at this as a failure, maybe you can learn from it? Ask yourself what you could have done that was different. For me, I'm such a hardcore addict that I have to avoid social eating whenever possible. Sure, it's not ideal and I can't always avoid it, but I know that it's an issue. The key is to have more good events than bad so I'm working on it as many of us here.

Hang in there and post often....we're all here because we need help.

Amarantha2 12-10-2012 11:04 PM

Just keep going. Two pounds on or off are irrelevant. Weight loss is a recursive journey.

Everyone has good days and bad days in a weight (or life) journey.

Hugs, you'll do it and you do have what it takes.

Keep going. :wave:

valentine21463 12-11-2012 10:16 AM

Wow! Such great advice in this thread. I really needed to see these today. Thank you all.

junkatarian 12-11-2012 08:19 PM

I am thankful to everyone who responded to this post. I really needed to hear some positive feedback and thank you for supplying it! Your ideas are helpful ones to counteract the negative thinking that has been going on in my head. I really like the idea of reframing my way of viewing this setback and also the idea of weight loss being recursive. It seems like I should have this problem solved already. I mean how many times am I going to be dealing with this? But the answer is many, many, many. Don't get discouraged. Thank you all.


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