do you ever feel like its physically not possible?
 

even 35lbs ago, i never thought itd be possible for me, someone who fits into a tight size 12 jeans, to be able to fit into size 8.

even today, i think its IMPOSSIBLE for my body to be smooth, not jiggle and be nice and lean. i just physically dont think my body can ever get that way just because it NEVER has in the past at all. i dont know what its like to have a flat stomach or anything close to it. yes im only 140lbs and am 5'6-5'7, but ive still got a lot of flab to me and i just dont think its possible.

basically ive given up. i just need someone to be able to relate.. hopefully im not alone on this

Okay, I can totally relate! It's hard to get past that hump. Usually that means you have to challenge yourself with new exercises and keep on eating right (with occasional indulgences to keep you sane). By the way, you are gorgeous! I would kill to have an hourglass figure like yours! I'm a pear shape, and it can be hard to look lean, even when I'm at my ideal weight.

I relate! I know I'll never have a Jillian Michaels body but I'm going to keep on working out because I don't want to be 155p ever again, that's for sure.

Well the strategy also needs to change on occasion. At your body weight, being a female, some body fat is normal, healthy, and REQUIRED to function optimally. Beyond a certain point fat loss isn't what you need, it is lean mass gains. So while it might seem impossible to get the body you desire right now, some of that may be because you're trying to diet yourself hard-bodied, rather than sculpt yourself hard-bodied. Dieting is good for weight reduction and fat reduction, but it doesn't do jack to raise metabolism or gird up the skeleton in any meaningful or aesthetically pleasing way.

Thus, if you're not already doing it, I suggest a strategy change to turn the currently-impossible into a reality for you :)

I think Arctic mama is right on. Also, you might want to check your expectations a bit - everybody has bits that jiggle, or are a bit fleshy, or aren't as smooth as they'd like. The only people who don't are the photoshopped people in magazines, or have incredibly good body image and are over it.

Anything is possible, right? Well, in terms of our bodies, maybe not! ;)

I know that I CAN lose more weight and get more toned, etc. But I just don't want to do what is necessary diet and exercise-wise, to get there. Whether it is laziness or just acceptance, my current weight is relatively easy to maintain, so I live with the wiggles and jiggles. :)

Thank you so much. Im sure you will look great... any healthy body always does =]
I think im just really lazy but thats mainly because I just dont think its possible. Logically,I know how the body works, and its very much possible for me to be lean.. but for some reason I feel like im an exception to this rule. It's weird. Im going to try as hard as I can buttt gah hard sometimes! :(

I understand this but at 20 years old, I feel like I should be a little more youthful in terms of my body. Alot of my friends have beautiful, jiggle-free bodies and I know its possible. Im at my peak in terms of looks, but I just dont feel like I am. I see mothers of 3 children who have better bodies than I do in a bikini.. it's just not what I had envisioned. I am so proud of how far I've come, and I like my body, but in a bikini.. i still hide.

Even your friends with supposedly "jiggle-free" bodies probably have hang-ups about something that you wouldn't even notice, I bet.

I've gotten down to 112lbs and there are women a lot heavier than me with better bikini bodies! :dizzy: I have loose skin, stretchmarks, etc. even after strength training (and I'm 24 and never had kids). Is it annoying and not what I also envisioned? Of course! But there really is little reason for me to be upset about it when I can do so much more than I could when I was over 200lbs.

What have you accomplished since you were 35lbs heavier? What can you do now that you couldn't do 35lbs ago?

As one of those moms who looks hotter now than I did before any children, I can confidently tell you that with rare exception the women with those bodies are the ones who WORKED for them. Even naturally slender women look fairly fleshy and skinny-fat (or waifish) without a workout routine to support lean mass as well as limit body fat. I have yet to meet a woman or even girl (we'll use that term for the 15-20 crowd) who has a firm, lean body without athletics or strength regimens to attribute to it. Hiking, cycling, lifting, Zumba, some yoga types, whatever, they all DO work to make their bodies look that way.

And you're talking a lot about what you envisioned. Please be sure you have realistic expectations for the work you're willing to do. As a very wise ChickieChick has said, if you're not willing to do the additional sweating or cutting back to get the lean and hard look, you're going to have to do the MENTAL adjustment of being satisfied with how you look, where you are. Otherwise you're going to be discontent for no good reason other than mismatched and inflated expectations, and that's NO cause to be upset by the mirror when it is so simple to reframe :)

A whole lot more now, i can even shop without getting tired after 2 hours lol. I feel a lot more confident, but I guess my expectations are really high. :(

I cant seem to want to give up on this dream of having a really nice body though. its frustrating because my friend has a really nice body but works out less than i do, i know she does cos i spend alot of time with her. I know ill need to fix my eating habits and work out alot more but like i said, im starting to think its uselessss.

you've probably heard of the term skinny fat. you know when a person doesn't weigh a lot, but they're still "soft"
the key to that is lifting heavy 3x a week
and of course to look lean, you have to eat lean. not just eat less, but eat to feed the muscle

There's a few reasons that your friend could be working out less than you and have a nicer body. It is easier to maintain muscle than create it, so if she's already done the work & is just doing upkeep, that will take less effort than building muscle. She could have different genetics, that allow her to naturally carry and build more muscle than you do. Or, she could be working smarter and doing a more effective workout than you are.

That said, anyone can be over all toned if they put the work in and have a bit of an idea of what they're doing. 45 mins to an hour of weights (lifting to exhaustion and doing proper rotations) 4 times a week should do it. I'd suggest getting in touch with a personal trainer at your local gym or Y and having a consult. They will be able to tweak your workout to be more effective, and give you some ideas to tone areas that are bugging you. Often times, the first consult is free. If you don't have a gym, check out the beginner forum over at fitocracy.com or another fitness site - they have lots of people who can give you tips.

I still think that the goal of being comfortable in a bikini is more of a psychological thing than an actual body thing. I can tell you that I have always felt that I was fat - including when I was 145lbs at 5'11'. I've been more confident at much higher weights than that, especially right after I've lost 20 lbs or so.

I think incorporating heavy lifting into your exercise plan would make the biggest difference. Up your protein intake by a lot and make sure you're eating enough veggies and healthy stuff to stay full on, don't be hungry. Your focus seems like it's not on the scale, so you don't want to "lose" more weight, just change your composition.That's what I'm working on too, and I think heavy lifting has really helped. The basic squat, deadlift, bench press, etc are great to start on, check out some exercises on bodybuilding.com :)