This is SO individual. And most people have no clue, besides their own body and measurements, what the actual dimension s of someone else are. I've been considered healthy and quite attractive at a weight the same person would say is fat, because my body composition and measurements differ from their litmus as the same weight.
So I really try not to get into justifying, measuring, and eyeballing other people if I can at all help it, because too many factors beyond just weight determine whether someone is fat, and quite frankly it is their health and happiness that matters more than their size!
So for ME, I can answer that my start weight was unbearably obese - when I was in the prime of my life (21!) and got tired going up stairs, couldn't easily get down to play with my kids, let alone get back up. Where nothing I put on, no matter how expensive or elegant, looked good. My fat as inescapable and no angle I turned my head could hide it from me anymore. At my height then, of 5'2", with a broad but not overly dense frame, 260-ish pounds was morbidly obese in both appearance and BMI. That didn't make me ugly, a bad person, or even miserable from day to day, but it did become a stumbling block to me serving my family rightly, and I was convicted that I needed to fix it.
My original goal is what I remember 'not fat' being. Back when I was in highschool I was 160-165 and though I got called fat by a few rude boys, I was healthy, active, and considered quite lovely by many others (including myself - I didn't mind looking in the mirror). And it was a good litmus - when I got down to 163 right before this pregnancy most of my excess torso fat was gone - back and neck fat, flanks, apron fat, etc. It was reduced enough to give me a normal silhouette and my clothing was firmly a size 12/medium, except in button up tops (I have still been blessed with broad shoulders and a big chest, regardless of my weight). For me, that was a size that I could consider myself healthy and normal, even if I never lost anther pound. I was fit, looked good, and felt even better.
I ended up lowering my goal because once I got there I could see that additional fat could and should be lost from my body. There was a lot more work that could be done to improve my shape without too much difficulty in maintaining it. So I lowered the goal twenty to forty pounds, intent on stopping wherever I looked and felt best without excess daily struggle to stay there. Then iwas richly blessed with a little metabolic bomb called pregnancy and additional fat loss was somewhat stalled out by fatigue, cravings, food aversion, and the occasional bout of ravenous hunger. My goal still stands, but it will have to wait just a bit longer since I'm not quite halfway through this pregnancy. But I'm back on my plan and working off some vacation/fun eating weight, and will be raring to go when this baby is born and I'm breastfeeding. My original self-assessment still stands