Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Thread Tools
Old 07-30-2012, 08:04 PM   #1  
Senior Member
Thread Starter
guacamole's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,678

S/C/G: HW 212/148/130~174/139/130

Height: 5'4

Default Still seeing myself as obese....

sometimes inadvertently causes me to hurt people's feelings. I think perhaps I hurt someone's feelings over the weekend, or, at the very least, made them uncomfortable.

I won't get into details, but I was discussing with two friends a project I had been thinking about starting for plus sized women. One friend is a normal weight and the other is overweight. As I discussed the project, I very much was in the mindset that I was speaking as a plus-size woman. The focus audience of the project are women like me. Only, I don't really look like a plus-size woman anymore. Therefore, the target audience is no longer for women who look like me.

To my overweight friend, I was speaking as a normal size woman about overweight women, and I don't think it came off as being cool. She didn't say anything and it really didn't register with me at the time how strange or insensitive I must have sounded. However, I realize now that I really do still see myself as obese or overweight. I do group myself together with plus-size women. I have no idea when or if that will change, but I really think I have body dysmorphic disorder - or some semblence of it.

Does this happen to anyone else?

Last edited by guacamole; 07-30-2012 at 10:06 PM.
guacamole is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-30-2012, 08:24 PM   #2  
Optimistic cynic
Steph7409's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Albany, NY
Posts: 1,078

S/C/G: 220/209/180

Height: 5'3"


I was going through my closet last night and I decided to try on some sweaters I had worn just 4 or 5 months ago. At the time, I was happy to be fitting into that size, so I was surprised to discover that they're way too big for me now. I don't feel significantly smaller than I was then. I've had only a few brief periods of being a healthy weight during my life, so it's hard to not think of myself as overweight or obese. I know a lot of people describe themselves as being a thin person in a fat person's body, but I feel like a fat person who is trying to pass as not-fat.

So, anyway, to answer your question: yes.
Steph7409 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-30-2012, 08:43 PM   #3  
On the slow track.
DietVet's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 607

S/C/G: 210/ticker/160

Height: 5'9


Yeah, I've definitely had that experience during previous periods of weight loss and maintenance. I forget that I don't look the same way I feel.

It happens. Try to be more conscious of the ways that others perceive you as you stay true to your own self-conception. And be generous about the feelings of others.
DietVet is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-30-2012, 09:21 PM   #4  
Senior Member
Tai's Avatar
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,493

S/C/G: 272/111/Maintaining

Height: 5'4"


When I first started to maintain after losing the weight I had to kind of mentally transition. I had been overweight almost my whole life and morbidly obese for more than twenty years so it was a big change for me.

After about a year my brain caught up. I think it just takes us some time.
Tai is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-30-2012, 09:27 PM   #5  
Senior Member
Unicorn67's Avatar
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Posts: 134

S/C/G: 327/239.6/199

Height: 5'5"


I was thinking about this today after running into someone I used to work with. She was giving me so many compliments and saying how I must feel wonderful and how it must be so much fun to buy clothes etc. I told her I hadn't really bought much yet cause I can't see it yet. And she was shocked. But I told her when I look in the mirror I see the same person. It's not real to me yet and I still have a ton of weight to lose. I've almost lost 70 pounds and she didn't believe me...she was sure I had to have lost at least a 100. So obviously other people can see it but it takes longer for our own stubborn brains to get with the program.

And guacamole I think as far as hurting people's feelings that is part of the learning too. My not being able to graciously accept people's compliments probably makes them wonder why they bother.

It really is a mental journey.
Unicorn67 is offline   Reply With Quote

Related Topics
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
How to Best Help Obese Young People January Snow Weight Loss Support 53 01-01-2012 10:26 PM
Still seeing myself as the fat girl. criss 20-Somethings 20 04-18-2011 11:59 PM
Seeing Myself Naked is Scary Week #2 Enygirl Chicks up for a Challenge 500 10-11-2008 11:56 AM
Don't know how to dress myself anymore CoolMom75 Weight Loss Support 18 06-30-2005 01:13 PM

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:14 PM.

We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Copyright 2018 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.