When do I stop??
 

Hey guys :)

I have been having this problem for some time now and I am sure many of you have had the thought cross your mind. When do I stop losing weight? I feel like I am so used to losing weight that I won't know what to do with myself when I don't have to anymore! The problem is that I have always looked about 10-20 pounds less than my actual weight. It is my frame, the muscle, genetics, who knows... but at 5'6 and 175 I feel really athletic and I look good (IMO :D), I just want to tone some more. I am not looking to be stick thin, just toned. My doctor suggested to not go too much lower than 165 because of my body type.

Has anyone had a similar problem? When did you/are you planning to stop? I know maintenance can be just as grueling, but I truly can't wait to get there!!

Hi! I wish I had some advice for you but I'm kinda in the same situation.

I'm only a few pounds short of my goal and wondering if I may revise it (and go a little lower). I seem to be doing well with weight loss ... but not sure how I'll manage once I hit maintenance.

Like you, I'm getting ppl saying to me now (as recent as today!), "oh, geez you're skinny, you don't want to lose any more". I'm still toying with the idea of dropping a little lower, maybe down to 110 - which, because I'm short, would be ok on me. At the same time though, I want to maintain and even increase muscle mass, not lose it so I'll be focusing on body fat percentage - this may mean the scales don't budge much at all from here.

I'll probably just have to play it by ear - see how I feel. I need to watch my energy levels, and general health, so I'm confident my body will let me know when enough is enough. If I start to get sick/run down then I'll know it's reached its limit. Maybe you have already considered this as a possibility?

I say play it by ear as well. Also keep in mind that you are going to be working on "maintaining" once you reach that point. You don't want to get to a weight that you can't maintain. I've have done that even though I was in the middle of a healthy range for my height. Since I'm pear shaped, my face and upper half were very thin and I had people thinking that I was losing too much weight. Now, I'm 10lbs heavier and no longer have to restrict myself so much and I feel like I can still "splurge" every now and then. I did go up a pants size but as a pear shape, thats to be expected:)

For *ME*, I thought I looked pretty damned great at 175. I felt strong, and people *thought I weighed less. (* I know now they just said that to be nice). Actually 175 was my original goal. Once I reached it, I was still on a roll and I felt like I had more in me, so I decided to continue on. I decided to try and get to a "normal" BMI. So I made it, and the maintaince transition process was more difficult than I imagined and I ended up losing about 15 more pounds. I have since then leveled off to around 145 and it feels pretty good.

NOW, when I go back to pictures of *ME* at 175 I am shocked at how big I look when I thought I looked so hot...lol :)

It's all a guess. Do what feels right. If you decide to go lower and don't like the result, you can always gain some back.

It's a hard personal decision to make for sure! I chose 140 because at 146 everyone thought I looked great but I know there were a few problem areas on me I would have liked to work on. I would also like to fit into a size 8.

I've seen someone on here give the advice of to keep going and then if you start to look too thin that's when you stop and start to maintain and even let yourself gain a little to get to that 'comfortable' point.

i'm having this issue as well- maintenance is a scary thing.

just do it until it feels right.

if it feels right now, stop and take a breather. maybe lay off a little bit? if not, then keep going!

Thanks guys for all the great advice! It is such a weird place to be in. I know I am not at risk of being too skinny ANY time soon :P But I have had people make comments like "you looked better with a little more weight on you" and what not. I know, stupid, but still it makes me wonder. I have literally not been under 160 since early middle school. I don't even know what I would look like!

Have any of you taken a break to level out and have a rest and then kept going? I think I will stop at 165 and see if any lower would even be a possibility.

I think you should at least attempt to get into a healthy BMI range. I'm curious as to why a doctor would suggest something higher than that?

I'm toned and I carry my weight really well but I still get flack at my doctors office for being over healthy BMI for my height.

I took a maintenance break for a year and a half. I'm back to get the rest off.

I am ending a two year break at just under the healthy BMI threshold. I found that it was "okay", but left too much room for bad habits and no exercise. I think I have room for more strength and flexibility, plus I need to improve some blood work numbers further. I'm (with the exception of tonight) following a better eating plan and adding exercise - I expect about 140 when stable, but not sure. It's new territory. :)

@Val- I agree. I want to at least eventually get to 155 which is the top of the normal BMI range for me. But BMI is truly not an accurate measure in some cases. For me, 155 will be a lot different than that same weight on another body. I have no idea what it is but my whole family is just "heavy". My sister is 5'6 150 pounds and wears a size 2 or 4. Good luck with the rest of the weight, that is true dedication for finishing it off!!

@ICU- Good luck to you! What kind of exercise are you doing? I really want to give my body a bit of a break but I am afraid I will get lazy and gain some back. Good for you for sticking it out!

Oh gosh it's really hard to know when to stop. I could have stopped twenty pounds ago when I was at the top of the healthy BMI range. I looked really good then. Everyone kept saying I looked awesome, I had nice curves, etc.

However, I really like how I look now ;)

Originally Posted by mirax3:
@Val- I agree. I want to at least eventually get to 155 which is the top of the normal BMI range for me. But BMI is truly not an accurate measure in some cases. For me, 155 will be a lot different than that same weight on another body. I have no idea what it is but my whole family is just "heavy". My sister is 5'6 150 pounds and wears a size 2 or 4. Good luck with the rest of the weight, that is true dedication for finishing it off!!

It really sounds like we have similar body types. I'm the same height as you, large framed, muscular (I lift weights) etc. Currently I'm 161lbs and wear a 4-6 (but the 6's are definitely baggy now).

I've been 140lbs (so in the late 90's I was wearing a size 8 then no clue what that would be now-a-days with vanity sizing) when I was high school and 155lbs in college (was wearing a 10 then but again, vanity sizing has obviously changed that!). Both looked great on me so I decided to set a goal range where I really want to get below 155lbs so doctors stop bothering me but I won't get below 140lbs because I know that's maintainable and I don't want to go so low that it's hard for me to maintain.

If you want to see pictures to get a better idea, check out my progress pictures here. I post them every 10lbs.

I really don't think I look too thin at this point, I definitely have a good deal I could lose in my stomach, for instance. But I am pretty happy with my body (and pretty much have been after getting 175lbs).

As for the question of where to stop? Well, I have some other goals too. I wanted to wear a size 8 or under (check), I want to have a 28" waist or under (30" at the moment so no), originally wanted to get my bust/hip measurements under 40" (check so I moved that goal to 38"), and I have some fitness goals too. I've tried to think more about the shape that I want rather then the exact number of the scale. ;)

mirax, thanks! I appreciate the sentiments of good luck! I'm a past Masters-level competitive swimmer who's gone very, very soft. At 44, I'm also discovering that a body that's been in motion, desperately wants to remain in motion, and will send you all sorts of messages. :D I can hold my weight at the "healthy" number by watching what I eat ... but my LDL goes through the roof unless I exercise. I got slapped in the face with a 205 LDL/295 total cholesterol about 3 weeks ago - first time I've ever failed the ratio. And my left shoulder is my bellwether of fitness - it acts up when a) I am stressed, b) when my neck is out of line and it's time to visit the chiro, and now c), when my back and abs are too weak to keep it in proper alignment.

So ... I am sneaking up on fitness without getting my brain into it too much. I'm just running/walking on the treadmill, and last week I took my first deep-water aerobics class. It's accelerated my weight loss a bit, plus I feel "firmer" in the softer spots. When my shoulder gets back to not hurting, then I will go back to lap swimming and resistance bands - just very, very carefully this time!

I honestly don't know where I'll end up. In the best shape of my life (junior year of HS), I weighed 150, but could bench 165 and was 9-10% body fat. Ten years later, I was in the 140's and "skinny fat" at close to 30%. These days, my goals are more around functional fitness ... but I won't rule out short-course Nationals for next year, either! ;)

To your original post of "where to stop" - I guess it's where you find your balance of doing things at a level that you can do them forever. The scale's a dependent variable ... not a result in and of itself.

Yes, you can be large-boned and carry your weight well. I'm small boned so I've had the opposite problem :(
When I hit 135 lbs, I was told to stop losing weight.
Honestly, I considered myself done when I reached my goal but I'm always trying to 'fix' parts of myself. Right now, I'm on an intensive 30-day get-fit plan in order to get my body ready for the summer. I don't care so much about the weight anymore, I just want to look lean and sleek.
I guess I've started realizing that it's really over now that I don't spend so much time feeling guilty about what I've eaten. I don't see nothing but fat when I look in the mirror. Sure, there are 'spots' that I think need to be reduced but I can be happy with my appearance.
That's why I agree with everyone who says you should play it by ear. My 140 lbs was an abstract goal because I'd never been that small and it sounded like a nice, round number. Once I reached 140, I decided to lose more. Just see how you feel when you get there.

@ Running- yes we do have a similar body type! You look excellent btw, congrats! I am 175 have a 28 or 29 waist. I would love to get to a 26 or so but we will see. I have an hourglass figure and my weight spreads pretty evenly... but my thighs are stubborn! What kind of exercises have you been doing? Keep up the good work!

@ ICU- you're welcome! That is great that you are already athletic. It can be a real struggle to lose weight and tone when you are not already an athlete. You seem to have a similar body type to me as well, muscular. I have never and never will be a teeny tiny little thing. My structure just won't allow it! But kudos to you for getting serious about fitness, it will really help with the maintenance part when you decide you have gotten there. Thanks for the advice, you are definitely right- I need to be able to maintain the weight I choose forever.

@ imperialistic- Your pics in your signature look wonderful! You have come such a long way, you should be proud. I can't wait until I get to the point where I can either decide to lose some more or just stick with that weight. Are you still on a "diet" or are you just exercising and maintaining at this point?

Originally Posted by mirax3:
@ Running- yes we do have a similar body type! You look excellent btw, congrats! I am 175 have a 28 or 29 waist. I would love to get to a 26 or so but we will see. I have an hourglass figure and my weight spreads pretty evenly... but my thighs are stubborn! What kind of exercises have you been doing? Keep up the good work!

Thanks! I do heavy weight lifting 1x/week (loosely I follow the New Rules of Lifting for Women but I don't do leg exercises because I have a knee injury). I have some comparisons of my before and after lifting pics here. Also I swim about 2-3x/week. I've noticed that since doing weight lifting my hips/thighs are slimmer than they've ever been. It used to be that I had to buy pants by my hips/thighs but now I just need to worry about my butt/waist. I have found Levi's Supreme Curve ID jeans a good fit.

I technically hover between a hourglass and a straight figure. :dizzy: My midsection is very straight up and down so I can wear jeans made for women with much smaller natural waists but my actual natural waist isn't very small. :lol: However, I still have large breasts and a big butt so I still have some of the challenges of dressing an hourglass figure but I don't have the nipped in waist and wide hips to go with it.

Originally Posted by ValRock:
I think you should at least attempt to get into a healthy BMI range. I'm curious as to why a doctor would suggest something higher than that?

Probably because the OP's doctor, unlike most, realizes that going by BMI alone is not always a good indication of a person's overall fitness and health. You can be at a healthy weight and still fall outside the "normal" BMI, for example, if you are muscular. Some doctors tend to take the BMI thing less seriously when they know there are other factors involved with some of their patients. Perhaps this is the case with the OP.

@ Running- I am going to have to check out the New Rules... I have heard about that. Your progress pics look awesome! I am going to have to be more serious about my exercise. For our body types, weight lifting really helps increase the tone and make us appear leaner.

I feel like my hips are pretty wide too. I can fit in a size 9/10 regular women's but I try to get ones that stretch a little for my hips! I saw the Levi's Curve ID in my current size at the thrift store the other day. These days I am not buying clothes for the full price as I intend on losing more and don't want to waste money! I will go see if those pants are still there.

What kind of diet are you following? For me, it's mostly vegetarian with plant-based protein as much as possible and occasionally lean cuts of chicken and some fish.

@ Snoofie- This is exactly what my Dr. told me. She also sees my father and said that he shouldn't focus on the BMI number too much either (we are built similarly). He is an extreme athlete, does triathlons, cycles centuries almost every weekend. He is still "overweight" on the BMI scale. Muscle mass skews the scale and makes it so that people who are very healthy and at a good weight for their size can still be considered "overweight". However, it is a relatively good measure to TRY to stick to. I am not advocating throwing the BMI completely out, but there are other factors that contribute to weight and being slightly overweight on the BMI scale is not the end of the world if you are muscular and athletic.

@Running- I just took a look at your blog on bras and I particularly liked your post about "Living in a bra desert"- cracked me up! That's so true, and Ihave felt your pain before. I lived in Egypt and then in Saudi Arabia for awhile and I will tell you I was squeezing my then larger boobs into a 38 D because that was the largest I could find!!! Now I am down to about a 36 D sometimes C but I can totally relate to the quadraboob. That's hilarious! :D

I am just starting out trying to lose weight so I don't know if my opinion will amount to a hill of beans, lol. But based on my research over the past couple of years and on my personal feelings, once you are so close to where you want to be (as you seem to be), I think you should throw the scales out of the equation. If there are problem spots, then change up your exercise regimen to work on those problem spots but don't neglect the rest of your body. Dieting will only get you to a smaller version of what you already were but the problem areas will remain. Only exercise (a healthy balance of lifting weights and cardio) will work those out. I hope you don't mind my opinion here :-) Great job on the weight lost so far!

Originally Posted by mirax3:
@ imperialistic- Your pics in your signature look wonderful! You have come such a long way, you should be proud. I can't wait until I get to the point where I can either decide to lose some more or just stick with that weight. Are you still on a "diet" or are you just exercising and maintaining at this point?

Thanks. No diets, I'm on total maintenance now. No more calorie counting for me but I eat as healthy as I can and keep it to small portions. And then my new get-lean routine :)
I think that's why you shouldn't stress about your goal weight. The numbers aren't important (they are but only to track progress somewhat). What really matters is the way you feel. One of my girlfriends is 5'7" and weighs 150 but she looks so fit- I mean, literally, her abs are Victoria's Secret model types. It's all about the bone structure and the genes. When you get closer, you'll start feeling it. And when you're there, you'll know as long as you're being sensible about it.

Originally Posted by mirax3:
@ Running- I am going to have to check out the New Rules... I have heard about that. Your progress pics look awesome! I am going to have to be more serious about my exercise. For our body types, weight lifting really helps increase the tone and make us appear leaner.

I feel like my hips are pretty wide too. I can fit in a size 9/10 regular women's but I try to get ones that stretch a little for my hips! I saw the Levi's Curve ID in my current size at the thrift store the other day. These days I am not buying clothes for the full price as I intend on losing more and don't want to waste money! I will go see if those pants are still there.

What kind of diet are you following? For me, it's mostly vegetarian with plant-based protein as much as possible and occasionally lean cuts of chicken and some fish.

Definitely try on the Curve ID jeans if you can. A lot of times they have them on sale on their website (usually for around $30 and many times they have free shipping too!). You can also check out PZI jeans. I haven't tried them yet, but I've heard really good things about them. :D

I don't have a set diet but I basically made small changes that included:
- giving up all sugar/artificial sweeteners
-switched to whole wheat everything
-eat primarily fruits/veggies and lots of protein (I actually used to be a vegetarian too but I've found that eating meat has helped reduced my hunger levels significantly. I'm still not the biggest fan of meat but it's made a big difference in my diet).

At this point I do occasionally have sugar but I only buy single size portions about once a week, we never keep anything in the house. I do bake with natural sweeteners or even just fruit about once per week and will make cookies/cake/pie or something (with whole wheat flour, oats, fruit etc). I posted an example of a day of food for me here.


Oh, and I'm glad you enjoyed my blog! Sorry that you had the experience of living in a bra desert too, ugh! I heard that Saudia Arabia is making some changes when it comes to how they sell bras and that now they have females working in lingerie shops so women can at least try on bras before buying them. I can't imagine how frustrating that had to be before!!!