Just realize something....I'm scared of reaching my goal. The other day I went to a store that I go to once or twice a month and the owner asked me if I was feeling okay because I looked so much smaller (I don't in my eyes). Then in the break room at work, a co-worker said "you're just withering away." I have a long way to go but I got his point.
Now, I feel...pressure. When I reach goal (almost said if)...I keep thinking of how embarrassed I might be to gain it all back. Especially since everyone is watching me. All of the people who have given me such supportive comments...I kind of feel scared of letting them down. I don't plan on gaining once I reach goal (who ever does) but as the comments increase, I just feel pressure because I feel like everyone is watching me. I am a bit of a private person and I guess the public part of this is bothering me.
The bad part of me keeps saying that if I loose too much, then I'll have to work extra hard to stay there. Anyone know what I mean?
I hear you!
I had huge issues around September when I realized this is actually possible. I can reach my goal! Never really believed it is possible I guess.
It was a strange feeling. I was scared, confused and really panicing about what happens if I hit goal and I don't like my new body and also about re-gaining the weight and letting people down. Being embarrassed by a huge gain etc.
I think it took me weeks to get over it. I still have a hard time believing it is happening but now I have a different goal. I think part of it that you fear you reach the goal and what then? I kind of feared the end of this journey I guess.
Now I realized I am not done even when I reach my goal or an ideal weight. I still have my fitness to consider so I plan on making that my big goal for next year. I don't want to be only at a normal BMI but also have a good level of body fat and fitness too. I am sure that will keep me busy and focused for at least a year. And I even get to hang here! :-)
I understand exactly what you mean. Even though I've kept my plan super private and been generally non-committal in real life about what I've been doing. I do fear gaining the weight back because I know a few people (especially family people) are kind of looking up to me and using me for inspiration. Even though I didn't ask for that responsibility, I don't want them to feel discouraged or feel like it can't be done.
At the same time though, this is the only time I've actually by myself decided to lose weight and commit to weightloss and fitness goals for any length of time. I've tried really hard to do this in a way that I can see myself living for the rest of my life (partly why this has gone rather slowly) i.e. not really putting anything off-limits and trying to learn self-moderation and accountability and focusing on learning to make good choices. I don't know, maybe I'm being naive or overconfident, but I don't feel that shaky in terms of sticking to this long term (knock on wood). I do think I'm always going to need a goal though. I'm already envisioning a further weight loss goal when I get to my goal right now. And eventually maybe further fitness goals. Maybe what you could do is begin to get into the maintenance mindset and plan for that- maybe frequent the maintenance board on here, start planning other goals you want to achieve for yourself once you're at goal etc.
I understand exactly what you mean. Even though I've kept my plan super private and been generally non-committal in real life about what I've been doing. I do fear gaining the weight back because I know a few people (especially family people) are kind of looking up to me and using me for inspiration. Even though I didn't ask for that responsibility, I don't want them to feel discouraged or feel like it can't be done.
At the same time though, this is the only time I've actually by myself decided to lose weight and commit to weightloss and fitness goals for any length of time. I've tried really hard to do this in a way that I can see myself living for the rest of my life (partly why this has gone rather slowly) i.e. not really putting anything off-limits and trying to learn self-moderation and accountability and focusing on learning to make good choices. I don't know, maybe I'm being naive or overconfident, but I don't feel that shaky in terms of sticking to this long term (knock on wood). I do think I'm always going to need a goal though. I'm already envisioning a further weight loss goal when I get to my goal right now. And eventually maybe further fitness goals. Maybe what you could do is begin to get into the maintenance mindset and plan for that- maybe frequent the maintenance board on here, start planning other goals you want to achieve for yourself once you're at goal etc.
I like the way you think! When I started in Jan 2009, I was 272. I had gotten down to 207 and could smell the 100's and my mom was diagnosed with cancer. I took care of her during her transition and didn't see the inside of a gym for over 2 months. I also didn't pay attention to what I ate. I gained back over 20 pounds. I am back down to 216 and I can NOT wait to reach ONEderland. I am so hoping that I can make it by mid-Dec.
justlorna: Sorry for everything you've gone through. I hope your mom is better now. Well done for picking back up, once things normalized a little. Life happened but you didn't give up. The best we can do is get up each day and try to be better and reach for out goals. I think that's part of what this journey is about. Finding out how to live with the new lifestyle you're developping. At least now you know, if you ever falter in your weightloss, you can pick right back up before things get too bad. It's not all or nothing. There's no race to get the finish line first.
I know just what you mean. I lost about 60lbs a year ago....and sit here a year later, right back up to my high weight. It was hard because people would comment on how "thin" I was and I know people slowly watch me put it right back on.
That being said, its worth it. 100%. Screw what people say. You're getting healthier for you, not for the people around you. The people in your life who care will be supportive.
I'm Scared
