Hello,

My name is Jay and I am looking for a group of people who I can talk to about my issues with weight and not get weird looks from. Truth be told I don’t look quite as big as I am. My weight is 262.6 lbs I say I look about 240ish and am a good enough dresser to make myself look even smaller. This proves to be a huge barrier in my search for support.

“You’re not that big you don’t need to lose weight.”

And other things like that are said to me often and they just don’t understand. The simple fact is this:

A) Clothes don’t fit anymore that ought to.

B) I can’t really fit into the desks at my college anymore even if I don’t “look” big, evidence proves otherwise.

C) This is the biggest I’ve ever been in my life and the depression from it makes me not want to do anything.

Something that has always prove difficult for me to gage exactly how much exorcise I ought to be doing is the fact that I am not inactive. I don’t own a car so I walk everywhere, I work with some lighter weights whenever I can and my job is pretty cardio intensive (I sell books, yes, but 90% of book selling is running around with 20 lbs of books and doing squats all day putting them back on the shelves xD, with this in mind there is no doubt in my mind that books are not only good to strengthen the mind but the body as well).

Sadly, I am hitting 30 this year and am starting to feel it a little. I can’t seem to hold off weight like I used to. Being a college student at this age forces me to see all the 18-23 year olds with huge arms and -.05 body fat all the while eating a hamburger. It makes me less then pleased and does not help my esteem any.

Well, I think I am done *****ing. This is my way of introducing myself, I appreciate taking the time to read this and all comments on anything I have mentioned are welcome. If I were to list a problem I am having right now it is motivation. I have the weights right in front of me but I just don’t pick them up often enough. I don’t run as often as I walk and let’s face it, after an 8 hour day I just don’t have the energy to exorcise. The fact I am over weight makes me upset and the fact it feels like lie is throwing everything a me to keep me that way makes me feel even worse.

I bid you all good evening, and will be checking in again tomorrow.

Hey there, Jay! And, welcome!

Don't let your weight or age get you down. I wish I had not let it bother me and stop me from doing things I wanted to do for so long. I thought it wasn't getting to me, but now that I've lost some, I realize it did. I went back to school to a traditional college when I was 34. A lot of the "kids" didn't seem to realize I was significantly older. Of course, some of them did know, but it was fun for me to get to know them. I never felt like I really fit in, but most of them were really friendly and nice.

As far as roommates go, what are ya gonna do, you know? You live there, too. Since you are a "carnivore," have you thought about doing the low-carb approach? Just adding veggies is good, but taking out the unnecessary carbs might get things going as far as weight loss is concerned. Just a thought! I know you said you should exercise more, but for me, exercise is secondary. I know someone will disagree with me, but exercise really did not help me lose weight. Diet did. I'm not saying you shouldn't exercise! I'm just saying focus on what you eat first.

Not sure if any of this helps, but good luck to you!

I also believe that diet is first. However, exercise is very important as well. Exercise keeps me focused and away from the junk food. I exercise 7 times a wk (4 jogs, 3 pilates sessions) and find that I only lose weight when my diet is OP.

As for the veg. roommate, talk to him/her about your issue with cooking. You could even try eating vegetarian once a wk. It's cheap and you would lose the cals from the meat. You could do a veggie stirfry with a small amount of whole wheat pasta. Mushrooms have a meaty texture and help you feel like you're eating meat. Just an idea.

And as far as the "lighter" weights go, use heavier ones. If you have access to them. Weight training with heavier weights for fewer reps gets your heart rate up and makes you stronger. Add some jumping jacks into the mix and you've got a circuit training workout. Include your whole body for max benefit. Go hard for 20 mins, 3x a wk and that's all the strength training you need for now. Bump up the weights when the current ones get too light. Hope this helps.

Welcome Jay

I have found the people on 3FC to be very supportive and understanding.

You need to find a diet that works for you. I agree with theCandEs that as a carnivore a low carb diet may work for you. The most famous is the Atkins Diet. If you can't afford the Atkins book, check it out from the library.

I found that portion control was essential to weight loss. Get a food scale, measuring cups and measuring spoons. To know how much food you are eating. I found out that I was a terrible estimator of my food portions. The scale and measuring cup & spoons can be bought at Walmart very cheaply.

Most so called experts say that diet is far more important to weight loss than exercise is. Most say food reduction is 80% and exercise is 20% of weight loss. Weight loss can be accomplished with diet alone but for good health you should include exercise. It does not need to be a lot. I started by walking a mile each day and I have slowly increased it.

Post often, you are among friends battling a common problem. You don't have to do this alone anymore.

Larry,

Welcome =)

Food intake is essential to weight loss. It comes down to calories in vs calories out. You could be adding a lot of vegetables to your diet (an excellent thing, keep that up!), but you could be overeating other items still.

I suggest taking a normal week and just tracking what and how much you eat (AND DRINK!) and figuring out the calories. You'll have a better idea of what needs changing when you compare it to how many calories you'll need to eat in order to lose weight. Not to mention Calorie Counting is one of the easiest ways to keep track of food. It can be customized to almost any degree, and can be as simple or complicated as the individual needs for their lifestyle.

You sound like you get a lot of activity, which is amazing so do keep that up, as well. However, you might want to check out the Exercise area for ideas about specific routines (like how to efficiently weight lift) if you have the time.

I do also suggest mentioning it to your roommate. They might have a crazy nose, but you still have a right to eat the balanced food you'd like. Do what you can to minimize the "smells". Use the oven vent, clean up thoroughly, open a window. Also, you can cook several meals worth of foods at one time in order to microwave them later. Even if you double up the portions while cooking and cut them in half for eating, that's lunch for the next day... or dinner for another night that week with less time and less "smell".

I'm sure you'll get a bunch of suggestions. We do like to help and support!

Hope to see you around the boards!

Thanks guys! It somehow feels a little better hearing some of this confirmed by others than going off of speculation. I was shocked to see you all say that diet > exorcize. Maybe I can stop worrying so much about trying to be more active than I am and just work on my food.

I saw someone mention drinks. I never worry about that because I only drink water and tea. I have not drink soda in almost 5 years now; I just don’t like the stuff. I was thinking about limiting carbs in my diet though it seems like the most effective way to lose weight.

Anyone have any suggestions on how to feel “full” when limiting starch and sugar? That’s my biggest problem, I don’t feel full so I just om-nom-nom myself into a coma (on not really but you get the picture).

I mean, I need to go cheap, REALLY cheap. I just (as in like 20 mins ago) found out the company I work for is completely liquidating all their stores. That means no more job for me come September and that’s right in the middle of the semester, also. Noodles and rice are cheap ways to make a meal easy and filling but also you know, contribute to weight gain.

Lastly I was not sure about the heavy weights/light weights thing. Thank you for clearing that up for me I do have access to some heavier weights and will use those instead.

Welcome, Jaypotter. I feel for you with regards to the comments from others about you not needing to lose weight. What I've done when told these types of things is to tell people, "Well, everyone in the medical community would disagree with you and my BMI is not in the normal range." end of discussion. It's ultimately nobody's bees wax what you choose to eat and how much.

I highly recommend counting calories. Doing so is free as you can look up calories fro things online. I agree with the recommendation to buy a food scale and measuring cups/spoons.

Have you considered beans for the protein? They are filling and cheap too. You can make yummy stews with them by adding lots of veggies...try to get those on sale.

If you see meat on sale, buy a lot of it and freeze it. Talk to your roommates about an arrangement. Let them know that you'd like to be respectful with their aversion to the meaty smell, but that you'd appreciate them being respectful with your diet and budget. Perhaps they can give you a day or two where you know you can cook at certain hours and they would not be home. Same goes for your eating times....maybe you could eat before they get home or after they finish eating, maybe they could leave for a little walk so that you could eat. Honestly, there are lots of vegetarians and vegans who live with carnivores and they just accept that not everyone shares their point of view. It's not like you're slaughtering the animals right there in their kitchen!

I hope you find another job for the Fall. Being a student is not easy but it's worth it. Hang in there and post often for support!