:hug: Sorry you're feeling down right now.

I understand where you're coming from. I have gotten frustrated in the past as well. It's easy to get very tired with having to lose so much weight. I have about 100 lbs I need to lose myself. Take it one pound at a time. Set your goals incrementally -- just focus on the next 5 pound goal, then the next, and so on.

You need a gentler approach to dieting, in my opinion. I personally detest calorie-counting but I know it's a good approach for some. There were some good suggestions I saw for low-carb dieting, since calorie-counting is not a problem there. I'm also able to follow a Mediterranean style diet, which is not low carb, (from the book Mediterranean Prescription) with just portion control and I still lose weight. So, there are options out there. Also, I'm not sure if this is still true, but if you're doing WW, I know they have one way of doing WW that involves selecting certain approved foods without having to count calories or points. I'm pretty sure that Intuitive Eating and Volumetrics are also some options that don't involve calorie-logging. Hopefully this can take some of the work out of the process, since it's hard enough already.

Just be kind to yourself and re-evaluate how you'd prefer to lose the weight. You've done great so far with a 30-pound weight loss :)

And remember, this is a great place to come for support even when your weight loss isn't where you'd like it to be. Take care!

Your life doesn't have to be as stressful as you're making it. You don't have to envy people who are thin and can "eat anything." They may have other problems. They may envy you for other reasons. Or they may only think they can "eat anything" - they can die just as easily of untreated cardiovascular disease or diabetes as any fat person.

You can always envy the people who are wealthier, thinner, prettier, more successful.... more anything than you. But envy is a choice. No matter your handicaps in life, you can waste your time envying the people who don't have your challenges, or you can work with what you've got. There will always be people more fortunate than you, but there will also always be people less fortunate. For everyone whose metabolism you envy, there are just as many or more people who could envy your metabolism.


I will never be able to eat without thinking about the consequences. I could be horrified by that, or I can treat it as "no big deal." Ironically I thought it was a bigger problem deal, when I thought fat was my only issue. Now, I find that I actually have food allergies and intolerances, which means no matter how thin I get, I will always be unable to eat without thinking about the consequences.

At least I don't have any anaphylactic allergies. The worse that can happen to me if I eat wheat several days in a row, my face will break out in open, weepy, crusting sores that burn and itch like a sonofa..... Super gross, but not deadly (as far as I'm aware of).

For me, food becomes a lot easier when I focus on all of the wonderful foods I can eat, as opposed to all of the things I shouldn't eat (I don't think of it as "I can't eat" because the truth is I always "can" eat whatever I want - if I want to accept the consequences, but a hamburger bun just isn't worth disfigurement, and eating whatever/whenever I want isn't worth being nearly 400 lbs again - or more because if I regain I certainly will end up fatter than before - as that always happenes whenever I quit a diet. I gain it all back and some additional to spare).

If you "just wanna be able to eat without thinking about all the carbs, fat, calories, fiber, protein and all that stuff," then pick a food plan that allows you to do just that. Just because "everthing counts" doesn't mean you have to count everything.

I follow an exchange plan, and I love it. It's easier than doing a crossword puzzle (heck it's easier than the simplest find-a-word puzzle, it's just checking off boxes).

The number of foods I can eat without adverse consequences is limitless. I used to think "there's hardly anything I CAN eat," but that's so not true. I've become a bit of a food snob when it comes to fresh fruits and vegetables. Every week I try something I've never tried before, and in three years, I haven't run out of things to try. I only see more and more to try every time I go to the grocery store or the ethnic market.

You can choose to see the bright side, but it's difficult because we're taught not to. We're taught to see dieting as unpleasant. If we find our food plan enjoyable and stress free, we must be doing something wrong (it's not true).

We're taught to think the that the process has to be stressful and frustrating, and grossly unfair to work. And we're taught then when it gets frustrating enough, we're supposed to quit (hey, it's what everyone else does).

We're taught to see our bodies as horrendously flawed, no matter what we see, even as we're taught that losing weight will solve all of our problems (and when it doesn't we're all fatally disappointed, and think "what's the use").

Losing weight doesn't have to be torture. It really doesn't. I get more pleasure out of eating now, than I ever have - because I refuse to feal guilty for eating. I won't do it. I've vowed to never do it again.

Taking out the guilt, also takes away the motivation to "cheat." If there's nothing "bad" about eating the stuff that only makes me sick anyway, there's never any good reason to eat it. I LOVE cheesecake (ordinarily made with wheat flour in the filling and in the crust). It tastes great, but not great enough to be worth making myself feel sick over.

You can find food that tastes great and doesn't make you sicker or fatter. But you have to be willing to do what you do. Unfair? You betcha, but it's no more unfair than the diets of people with PKU (essentially the diet required is so strict and unpalatable that it's often described as "if it doesn't taste horrible, you probalby can't eat it"). The consequences of going off the diet? For children - mental disability, and for pregnant women an increased chance of their unborn child being born with mental disability.

I've been morbidly obese and dieting most of my life (since kindergarten), but in the scheme of all things "unfair," it certainly could be a lot worse.