milmin2043....You have lost 80... EIGHTY! pounds!!! That is so dadgum awesome I can't even begin to describe *MY* envy of *YOU*!!!!! :carrot:

But I know what you mean about "looking at others' bodies" and thinking of *their weight* vs your own. I'm still at 170, struggling like a mad cow to get to 140! - and a friend of mine who is well into the 200+ range always says "I wish I was as small as you!"... Well, yeah, OK! - I appreciate that someone thinks I'm "small"!!! - but I know how SHE feels too! Because I have a friend who is even shorter than me (barely 5') and she is 120, and looks super-fantastic! and I would LOVE to be "as small as her"... but even SHE complains about her "poochy belly" ... I mean, wow, do we EVER give ourselves a break??? :?:

I gave up the gym a few years ago when I realized that in 3 years of membership, I could have had a home gym paid for by now! - so I did just that... cleared out some space, bought a weight machine, a treadmill (have since replaced that with a bike) and an ab-machine. I no longer have to see cute, fit, tiny little *girls* (as opposed to "mature women" such as myself...) with their big booblicles and tight tushies - I have a TV with a DVD set up, plenty of reading material, and it's just me & the workout.

And yet... I still see family/friends/strangers on the street & think "Wonder what she weighs...???" :dizzy: I guess it's just part of my DNA, to be self comparative with others... or maybe it's just normal-every-day-humanness. :chin: ;)

I envy that you're 155 and a 6/8/10.

I'm 140ish and I'm and 8/10. So again, you just can't compare so just stop it, seriously...you'll drive yourself insane - I know I have. I've lost 130 lbs and while most days I'm over the moon about it I still have days I wish I looked like someone else or weighed less or had less loss skin or whatever...it is what it is, we are who we are - learn to love it! Oh and BTW it takes a little time before you're brain catches up and sees your body for what it is now and forgets the old body.

That's exactly what I thought, too. (Great minds think alike ;) ).

We all have body image issue. I will always want my boobs to be smaller, my belly tighter, etc. Sometimes I look at other ladies at the gym (mostly during a Zumba class, as there is always about 30 ladies in the class so the selection is good) and I look at somebody of similar height and I wish I had "her" body. Strangely enough though I do not think about how much other people weigh, that'd doesn't seem to be important to me.

I am TERRIBLE at estimating weight. And other people are too- the other day my friend asked my weight and when I told them they said I didn't look like that and that I looked like I weighed in the 160s.

I mean really I WISH I were 30 lbs thinner but I'm glad that at least it looks it! lol.

Your weight is only a number- anorexic people who are like 100 lbs aren't healthy- but a woman can be 150 lbs with a smoking hot and healthy body because she eats right and exercises and takes care of herself :)

I am very glad that I have taken photos of myself at each 20 pound loss. When I feel like I haven't lost anything, I can see what I looked at at 290, and at 270. Then I can look in the mirror (haven't quite gotten to do a 250 photo yet, but soon!). There is definitely a difference.

I can't compare myself to others. I've been "the fat lady" for far too long. I KNOW my mental image is all messed up.

But I CAN compare me to me. That always helps.

Take out your old fat pants. Put a pair that currently fits over them.

:) That's what you've lost. There's a huge difference. It's visible, tangible proof, even if you don't see it in the mirror.

the way i see it is that everyone is beautiful -no matter what- and when You are at your desired weight you will only be a more polished off version of your formally still beautiful self ..no matter what your body shape

but i understand too, totally.......i lost a little over 100lbs and was at 160lbs still wanting to lose more and just did not think there was a difference in my body....definitely try to get the thought out of your mind because it didn't leave mine and now i have all that weight back and have to do it again, and not only did i gain all the weight back, i also gained back all + some of the health issues that come along with it...very de-motivational thinking ! .....i have horrible body image and self-talk and will most likely always feel a little bit like the fat girl in the room as i have been overweight the majority of my life, except when i was a young kid.....BUT .....now i just tell myself i am beautiful now so i can't wait to see how beautiful i am when i'm healthy !! ...now that is motivational ! :carrot: ....the negative self-talk and comparing was my downfall..i wouldn't have gained it all back if i had better self-esteem at that time......you just got believe it no matter what the mirror tells you....mirrors are big time liars !! ;)

I really am trying to change this way of thinking. You know, stop it in its tracks as soon as it starts.

When I lost a large amount of weight years ago, I gained it all back because I never believed that I was thin. I didn't recognize my face at all in pictures. Kind of like when someone has a facelift and they just look absolutely nothing like they used to, but in a creepy, wax figure way. If you know what I mean?

I realize that I am having body image issues, like so many of us. I sometimes need to type out how I feel to people I know will understand so that I can stay on track and also explore these feelings. Before, I did what I do best and I ate those feelings, all the way back up to the middle 200s. I don't want that to happen this time. I want this to be the LAST time. I'm too tired and old to do this yet again.

I remember saying to people all those years ago that I didn't recognize myself anymore and they would just push it aside and say "you look great", quit obsessing. It's not about compliments from others or acceptance from others. It's about how I feel about myself. I appreciate ALL of your comments. I especially appreciate that so many of you take the time to respond to my post. I am busy too and I know it takes time. You are all special, beautiful people.

I am the same as you - I've lost about 85 pounds in a fairly short amount of time, after being morbidly obese for a good 12+ years. And obese for years before that! My brains totally haven't caught up. I still feel like that fat girl. And I wonder a lot about what other girls weigh - I just want to say, "OK, that's what I look like to other people". I was happy when I got to my sister's weight because then I had a frame of reference or something...I just don't quite get it!

Maybe she was shaving 20 pounds off in the exercise machine to get a more accurate calorie count? I do that.

But I TOTALLY know what you mean! I am semi-obsessed with what other women weigh and their sizes and comparing myself to them. Completely unhealthy, I know!

I also look at other girls and am like "damn I wish I looked liked that." But I get over it soon enough.

As for looking in the mirror. I have the opposite problem. One of the reason I think I let myself get this big was that every time I looked in the mirror, I still saw the old me. I didn't see the fat. O_o

Well at least on my face. Everything else was pretty hard to miss.

ps: your weight loss is amazing. Keep it up girlie!

Two things:
1. I put in a lower weight on the exercise machine because they aren't accurate. It's not a matter of I want to be that weight so I put it into the machine, it's that I know the machine uses weight in an equation to come up the calories burned. I have read many articles that say the machines overestimate the burn, so I put in a lower number.

2. Two people at the same weight will look different due to height and body shape and body comp. There was a magazine article (gosh I wish I remember where) that showed different women and listed their height and weight. I remember one picture of a fashion model and an athlete who were the same size, but the athlete weighed more. She has a higher muscle mass and lower fat mass. One Pound of fat and one pound of muscle weigh the same, but the fat takes up more space. learned this the hard way. After my first kid, I weighed the same as I did before I got pregnant with him, but I was a size larger because I had lost some muscle mass and apparently added some fat.

I wonder what other people weigh, not from a comparison stand point, but from trying to get my head wrapped around what is realistic. I think, because so many more people are overweight than ever before, our perspective is out of whack.

That aside, my boss's wife and I are the same height, she weighs about 135. If I weighed that, we would not wear the same size clothes. She is a stick. No boobs, no defined waist, no butt, and bird legs.

I have a set of double D girls, a defined waist and if I may say so myself, a nice looking butt, (when it's not overloaded, lol), and definitely more muscle mass in my legs and in general my whole body.

One of the things that makes me shake my head is, my youngest sister has been as high as 225 and as low as 150 over the last several years, and no matter what she weighs, she is SOLID as a ROCK! Her fat is not squishy. Mine on the other hand, jiggles around like half set jello. Go figure?

I do this as well. It's almost impossible for any woman to get a handle on what X00 pounds looks like, let alone those of us whose weight has fluctuated throughout our lives. Add in the fact that different people carry weight so differently, that age and height are factors, and that people flat-out lie about their weight (both to others and to themselves) and it becomes clear that there is no one--or two, or three, or ten--ways that a 135-pound body "should" look.

Comparisons are almost unavoidable given how many of us are thinking, "but how do I really look?" I don't know that there's a right answer given all the variables.

http://www.mybodygallery.com/

This site is seriously helping me with this same issue...or at least giving me some perspective :)