I do for the most part, though I'm not sure why. I do tell my coworkers, but that's because we are mostly females trying lose weight, so we support each other. My husband knows because its too hard to hide it from someone I've living with. And if I turn down a sweet treat, I have no problem saying I need to lose weight. But if the subject doesnt come up, I do not volunteer it.
I hate to admitit, but I think its because deep down I think I will either fail, or I will ose it but fail to keep it off as I did in the past, and people will think that if I tell them what I'm up too.
When I first starting losign weight this time, I didn't relaly tell anyone but my husband. I figured I would rather show them I was losing weight rather than tell them. I wasn't afraid of failing, I just knew that I had talked about it for so long I would rather just do it.
I'm pretty open about my numbers- as far as what I weight, how much I've lost. I probably wouldn't even be all that phased by a stranger asking- at this point I figure I'm not that weight anymore, and I won't be this weight for long, so who cares. I'll also answer any questions honestly about how I've lost weight, my eating plan, routine, etc. I don't advertise any of these things, but I'm not ashamed of them either.
The one thing I am fairly secretive about is my goal weight. Most people freak out when I tell them, and I get lectured on how that is just too skinny for my height, etc. It's frustrating and obnoxious. It is not only a healthy weight for my height- but a weight that I was at very easily for quite awhile. So, a few close friends know. My husband kind of knows, though he is worried, despite the fact I was that weight when we met. (For his sake- I have agreed that if I get to 135 and still feel the need to lose weight, I will go to counseling) I have not told my mother. Sadly, even though I know I will reach my goal, I will probably never tell anyone my actual weight when I get there.
I am totally open about my weight loss efforts. I'll tell people what I weigh, what I used to weigh, what I want to weigh. Sometimes people will say I'm not big enough to need to lose 20 more pounds, I just ignore them. People want to know how I did it, how much I eat, how much I exercise. It's amazing how I swear anyone and everyone I know (even very casually) asks me about it. I don't know if it's because I'm so open but I don't care and I tell them. It's no secret I was overweight, it's obvious I've lost a lot. Plus, like a lot of other posters have said it keeps you motivated.
My only exception is people who are obviously jealous and believe/hope I will put the weight back on. I've really only had one person that made me feel that way so I avoid conversations with her about weight as much as possible.
I have tried it both ways, my first attempt I didn't tell anyone i was trying to lose weight but for me that just turned into a big excuse for me. Meaning when I failed it really didn't matter cuz no one knew but me.
This time around I am telling everyone!! The only people who are really saboutouers are my family members. Everyone else has been super supportive and ask me every week how I am doing, and the one person who i thought would make fun of me and make rude comments has actually been awesome. He will tell me when he notices a change in my shape and tell me i look great and says he is proud of me. I work in a restaurant and all the cooks will make my food for me without all the added salt and butter etc.
I share my plans and what I do for exercise. I can tell when people are really interested or are just being nosy but I don't let them bother me. I figure it is from jealousy that I am succeeding.
I'm fine talking about it with my family and my husband, but work is a different story.
I tend to put a lot of pressure on myself, so I try to stay away from coming forth with too much at work. I feel like if I tell people at work that I am actively trying to lose weight, then they will eagle-eye everything I am eating. This happened before when a group of us did the Biggest Loser -- our "leader" would walk around like, "what are you eating today? do you know how many calories are in that? etc..." I was really hesitant to rejoin it this year, but I did, and this time with a different group of girls and they asked me to be the leader. I told them I am doing this for myself and I don't care what they eat or how often they exercise -- I'm just there to be support if they need it.
I haven't told anyone. My friends -- mostly other Ultimate Frisbee players -- are generally very physically fit. A couple of the girls are dealing with (underweight) eating disorders, and that makes it even harder to talk about weight loss with them. I do have a goal to run a certain number of miles this year, and I'm not at all secret about that and talk about it frequently.
This is my first ever serious effort to lose weight (and it's way, WAY overdue), and the thought of talking about it to anyone other than my husband makes me nauseous. Or maybe the nausea is just hunger...
Really, I just don't feel comfortable talking about it with anyone because I'm afraid I'm going to fail. It's the same reason I only told a few people I'd applied for a PhD program before I knew I'd been accepted... the same reason I haven't told anyone (even my husband, yet) the date of my qualifying exam... I'm ALWAYS afraid of failure, and the embarrassment and shame would make that failure even more devastating. Though I appreciate the words of support from my friends and family when they tell me I can accomplish something, the words don't make me feel any more confident. Most of the time, actually, those words make me feel worse - I feel like my loved ones have more faith and confidence in me, think more highly of me, than I deserve. *I* don't believe I can do it until I've done it. Trying to lose weight arouses that same anxiety.
I've told people who will be responsible for my food choices or who will likely be supportive, but I have avoided the topic with people who are likely to sabotage or comment unkindly. Many people I know would get really into it, constantly ask about it, put down any weeks I don't lose, decide to join in and then crow about their own 4lb loss when I have gained, criticise and analyze my food choices, tell me I "shouldn't be eating" this and that... just don't want to get into it.
Not sure what to do next time I visit my parents, it will be more than obvious I lost weight and they will immediately comment. All my life it's been the importnat thing, you were never doing well or badly, never looking good or bad, you only ever looked slim or "like a gasometer" and they comment to me about my sister's weight every time I visit. But they will still want me to eat like there's no tomorrow because they show love with food, and if I won't eat then my daughter will be given even more chocolate (if that's possible!!) becuase it "has to be eaten" (i.e. she's scared if she keeps it she'll eat it all herself, but she couldn't keep from buying it all because she has an out of proportion concept of how much chocolate you need to give a small child a "treat" - 20g is more than sufficient!)
Other people I suppose I just try to sidetrack them. It's been useful that I have lots of outsize clothes, I hardly ever see anyone and when I do see them I am wearing the same giant outfits as ever. They can probably sort of see I lost some, but they aren't confident enough to say anything. Come summer it's going to look like I stepped out of some kind of coccoon when I appear out from my thermal vest, top, sweatshirt, jacket, hat combo.
Then again with this surgery coming up I think I'll be cross if people credit 100% of the improvement to the surgery, like I didn't do any of the effort. Couldn't have had the surgery without losing the weight I lost so far, the surgery is just going to sort out some lumps and bumps so my skin hangs normally, but I bet people will think I "cheated" and just had my belly cut off! Like that works.
I think at first I didn't want to tell anyone and I still haven't really told anyone in my family because honestly I'm just not that close to them. But I've told a few people that I know will support me, and help me reach my goal but not bash or belittle me if I stumble along the way.
