Ugh. Starting over. *weeps*
 

UGH!

I managed to be on plan for a whole month (not much, but an accomplishment for someone like me) and then **** hit the fan in my personal life and it knocked me down, HARD. I've been off plan for a month! Totally negating all my previous work! Now, today, feeling fat, disgusting and bloated, I cannot take it anymore. This junk food and overeating lifestyle is totally not sustainable. It's so weird, I ate like crap for years and years and never really felt it. Then I eat on plan for a month and now my body is sick and disgusted of high grease and fat foods and I simply cannot continue this way any longer.

Please, does anyone have any pearls of wisdom or encouragement to offer, I really want this to be the last time I have to 'start over'.

Then make CERTAIN of it. You want it to be your last time? Then be willing to put forth the continuous effort.. no stopping, just continuing... no excuses.. none. You've got to learn how to navigate this healthy lifestyle within your life, regardless of your surroundings, regardless of your circumstances.

Stop giving yourself permission to eat off plan. You've got to push through the *tough* moments. You've got to give it 150%. Work past the discomfort. There is no other way to grow. Challenge yourself. Require more from yourself. Raise your standards. Push, reach, stretch, strive, grow, prosper, amaze yourself.

You know what works for me?

I visualize all of the negative people I've met that sort have gave me funny looks because of my weight and the people who probably are thinking there is no way I could ever be thin and healthy. I visualize those negative people there looking at me and saying how they know that I will fail. I hear them saying the "95% of people who lose weight regain it", etc.

Then, I know that I can prove them wrong. It is a personal challenge not just for my own sake but to show everyone else that it can be done and that we really can make this change in our life.

It may sound bad to use negativity as a motivator to succeed, but it helps me along. I want to do this for myself but I also want to do this because I want to show it can be done!

There is nothing in my life that I want more than to be as healthy as I can be.

i wouldnt say i have pearls of wisdom.. but i am in ur exact position....so all i can say is keep going... U CAN DO IT!!! :) one day you'll get there!

The thought that came to my mind was that nothing you did was negated...you did it for a month then you changed. Change back! We can choose good or bad each moment of each day. It really is ONLY your choice of what you do and what you allow yourself to do. I went up 5 pounds over my vacation and Turkey Day...I knew I was going to gain because of my choices. I also knew that I would choose to get back on my own plan and keep working at ME. Already lost 4 of the 5. This is the one time in our lives we get to be totally selfish...it's all about me. :) Good luck and choose wisely.

When my life gets stressful, I actually enjoy being on plan.

1) It's habit, so it's one less thing to think about. It's like auto pilot. I shop, I make lunches, it's just what I do.

2) The knowledge that if everything else is going to ****, at least this one thing is working well for me.

I agree with Glory - I find that when everything else is kinda out of control, this is one thing I can control and the results are making me feel so fantastic, there's just no way I'm stopping. In fact, stopping isn't a choice, because the way I eat is just the way I eat, and it will be forever. When things are going badly, the best thing you can do is take care of yourself and love yourself! You can do it!!

I use this technique daily at the gym. Using anger as motivation and past experiences seems to be working for me. Some people love smiling and being a positive Paul at the gym but I think I might scare other people.

:hug: How many of us have not slipped? I'd be surprised to find more than a handful of people here that have been perfect from their first attempt. So, please don't be so hard on yourself. Can you imagine if you were so hard on someone else? I doubt you ever would be, but we are really our own worst critics. Try to ease back with love and caring. This is not supposed to be a journey of punishment. This is a journey of self-discovery and it appears to me that you did discover something about yourself. You no longer derive long term pleasure from junk. Maybe this is the impetus you needed to really get what you're doing and to do it right. Maybe now, you'll nourish your body rather than deprive it. You will look at this as a new beginning to where you want to be with your life.

The key is to challenge yourself and see this as more of a wonderful experience (easier said than done, I know). What's the alternative? Give up? Throw in the towel? I can tell by your post that this is no longer an option and that's a great thing.

Make a plan, stick to it....if you get off track once in a while, pick yourself back up and see what you can learn from the experience. :hug:

If anything take this as a learning experience. That way you have at least moved forward with understanding of what happened so it won't happen again. Don't stay bitter about it- it doesn't help. I was down to 191 at one point and then gained weight as a result of a medication my doctor gave me. I held on to being bitter so long that I hurt myself and no on else. Now I'm trying to push forward (and I got off the medication).