[caliyah]

thanks ladies! it's been a bit tough 2 hold in my excitement --- but thankfully i've inspired a lot of my relatives to take up healthy eating so there have been some positive benefits = )

[Cglasscock1]

I don't talk about my weight loss efforts unless someone else asks me about it and then I keep it very brief. I think people are very defensive about their own eating and exercise (or lack of) habits and may feel threatened in some strange way when someone else is obviously making healthy changes. They know how much staying power it requires to lose only 5 pounds and may feel awed by someone losing a larger amount. I know I used to feel inadequate around people who were slim and confident. What do they have that I don't have, I wondered. I now know what that something is: a plan and stick -to -it-ness! So simple yet so hard.

[saef]

Yes, but that's because they know me.

And yes, I think it, too, because I know myself, and it's something that I have to be very, very, oh so careful about, because of my past behaviors & the way my mind works sometimes.

I'm a person who once had an eating disorder, and exhibited obsessive/compulsive behaviors around food & exercise, and I always have to watch myself. When I get too set in my routines, and feel uneasy at their possible disruption, or in my eating habits & choices, I have to make a conscious effort to change things up, to try something new. I have to shake my head hard, slap my own face, in effect, and say, "Ummm, that is an example of irrational thinking" or "You are being too rigid" or "Do it differently, just this once" or "Why not say 'yes'? What is so awful if you don't hew to your routine?"

For example: Right now I'm talking myself through what's going to happen on Thursday at work. We're going to order Chinese food for lunch. I got to pick the place, and it's one with excellent produce, which they don't overcook, and brown rice. I know its menu thoroughly. I know the healthy options. But I am still freaked out about this. Because I am so used to getting my salad down at the in-house cafeteria salad bar.

I am talking to myself reassuringly about this every day, that I can do this, that it will be okay, that I've done this in the past & it was okay.

The other thing I've had to learn is that the opposite of obsessing & controlling is not giving up entirely or eating whatever I want, whenever I want. No. It's actually moderation & flexibility.

So yeah, I am actually devastated whenever someone calls me "obsessed," because I work so hard at trying to keep it in check. I have a polite answer, but when I'm off alone, I curl into a fetal position practically & feel awful & think that I am so crazy, everyone can see that I'm obviously crazy. Well, I suppose that's okay, as long as they still like me. And as long as I keep fighting the good fight. Which includes not quitting in disgust & going to the opposite extreme, of saying since I can't find moderation, I should never try to be healthy at all.

[Cali Doll]

I probably am obsessive. I have an extremely obsessive personality. I'm usually always thinking about clothing sizes, weight vs height and calories.

I do try very hard to not talk about it, though. At the beginning of my journey I couldn't hold in my excitement and I told my friends about all of my weight-loss mini-milestones. Then I realized they probably don't care as much as I do...and I stopped talking about it.

I also do not want to be the person who tries to regulate what other people eat. I do NOT want anyone to think they shouldn't eat this or that around me. Plus, I indulge quite frequently anyway. I just hold myself accountable for everything...unlike pre-lifestyle change where I'd eat with reckless abandon.

Anyway, yeah, I'm obsessive I'm sure. If not this, it would be something else. ;-)

[Nada]

My sisters think I am obsessive about exercise and they don't know the HALF of what I do. I'm hiding my running journal when they are around--don't need any more grief. But when I talk to "real" runners I can see I'm just a slacker.

Obsessive in common conversation (not psychiatric definition) is relative. It just means you're making me feel bad, 'cause I'm not doing as much as you are.