Shame-based dieting?
 

I came across this article about the new Twitter diet option, where you publically tweet your food intake:
http://www.lemondrop.com/2009/10/26/...based-dieting/
I found a whole bunch of articles that supported the idea that publically sharing your daily food intake was a shame-based form of dieting. Putting what you eat "out there" allows others to pass judgement and this "fear" or shame in what you do makes some people feel more accountable.
On this particular forum, there are a whole bunch of "diet accountability threads" where members can publically post their intake for the day. This too is publically accessible as anyone can come to the site and surf around and read what you eat. Seems to me that the concept is the same. It surprised me that doing this was considered to be shameful!
Is publically recording your intake a shame-based form of dieting? Is it healthy? Or helpful?

I think it would be fine for people who do not tend to beat themselves up for not being on plan. The fear factor does work very well for some people. I think it really just depends on what type of personality you have. If it leads to a lot of negative thoughts about yourself, though, very detrimental. I'm pretty sure I would not be able to do it very well, as I have finally gotten over beating myself up - I don't need to relapse! I think for the most part, weight loss journeys should be positive. :yes:

I agree.

I hate shame-based dieting. But I think it's a bit much to declare that posting your food equals shame-based dieting.

First of all, there are lots of reasons to post your food. To do it because you think it will embarrass you into good choices is only one of them.

Secondly, others passing judgment does not make it shame-based - only *you* can shame yourself. You have to believe and buy in to what others say.

I think whether it's healthy or helpful depends entirely on the motivations and feelings of the person doing it, not on the fact of a public log itself.

That wouldn't work for me- I will post things I ate for the day on my blog- but I just do it for the heck of it- and to show off my food ;)

I think doing it in a positive environment, like 3fc, where you can get support and such is a good thing... I don't know that I would do the whole twitter thing, just because there would probably be some people who would come off more rude or hurtful than helpful.. that's just me though.

I do know that at least writing it down if nothing else helps to keep me accountable :).

LOL. What's to stop people from lying about what they ate in order to avoid shame?

Personally, shame only makes me want to isolate and eat - and isolating/eating is a very deadly cycle for me.

I have to keep shame out of my weight loss as much as possible - that doesn't mean I avoid sharing embarassing details about my life. I find that kind of openness does invite commentary on my life - and I don't always love that commentary, but I don't really equate that with shame. I see it more as "asking for input," because sometimes another viewpoint or two can help me see something I might be missing. I don't see it as punitive or shame-based though - but education based. I don't need other people to punish me (and most of the time I don't even need me to punish me - I definitely need it less than I tend to do it, but I'm working on that). I do, though need other people to learn. If I only have my own viewpoint, I'm pretty limited. But reading books (other people's opinions), and talking to people, there's no limit to what I can learn - not only about the world, but about myself.

I don't think that's punishing or shaming, I think it's positive and awesome.

ummm.. And also what is "shameful" eating for one is normal eating for the other. You could bash any kind of food ... OMG eggs, too much cholesterol! Wheat bread = too many carbs, olive oil/nuts - OMG so much fat!!

ETC.

The take on posting daily food logs and equating it with "shame based dieting" kind of me made me think twice. Before I read the aricle I had never seen it in this light. After the article, I got confused so I wanted to get some opinions. Thank you for the input.

I don't think it's shame-based at all. I agree with the above poster who said that 3FC is a supportive environment in which to hold yourself accountable regarding exercise and food intake. I have a thread that I'm always recording my food/exercise intake. I'm congratulated when I stay on plan and I get support when I'm off plan. I don't focus on the lurkers who just read and don't post a response nor do I focus on members who read and don't post a response. All that matters is what I think of my own food intake. I know when I've overdone it and I'm good at shaming myself. I think writing it down just brings my overdoing to light and keeps me accountable. I'd be afraid to write it out on Twitter because I'm sure I would get rude responses. I think it depends on the environment.

I think it would depend on the person. Some people might like the accountability. "Do I really want my mom to know that I had 6 pieces of pizza? Maybe I'll have a salad...". Or, if you're isolated from people already, it could bring you together, similar to the "whats your daily meal plan" threads we make here. Or help you understand why you're not losing weight quickly enough if you could compare caloric intakes. A lot of people think they are dieting without really understanding how many calories they are taking in. "healthy" food isn't always low cal food.

Personally, I'd worry about the other side of it. Having to account for everything to myself is hard enough and I could see it triggering food issues really easily. I know I'd just stop eating, rather than having to admit to so many people the average caloric intake I need, which could easily be translated into my average weight. So, while I can see some benefits, there is just no way I'm changing my twitter over....

i don't think you should regard any food as "good" or "bad" so why should you put out there what you eat and let other's label what you eat? That's not particuarlly healthy for your body or mind. I think you need to learn to eat a little bit of foods that you want that aren't as good for you so you learn to control what you eat and reach your goals!

I found shame-based dieting funny as a TV show (anyone remember "Starved") but do not think it would be productive. Having said that posting your food/meals can help you determine if you are eating hidden calories or may have an intolerance if you have stalled.

I think posting your diet for constructive criticism could be a good thing for some people who, like CruiseCat says, are stalled or maybe are consuming hidden calories. In that way, a critique from supportive chicks here would be a good thing. But if the purpose was to try to "shame" me into eating well? No, thanks! I'm already too hard on myself, I don't need a bunch of cruel strangers trying to make me feel shame over what I eat or how much I weigh.

I think it sounds like a terrible idea. But then, I've also never bought the theory that you must tell a bunch of people that you are trying to lose weight or are exercising so that they will "hold me accountable." Nah. I'm accountable to myself and I'll be my own food police!

Wow, I never thought of this as shame based and I have a HUGE superego so this is surprising. I enjoy reading what other people eat. Sometimes I get good ideas for new things to try. I don't know that I would do it on twitter-doesn't seem like the right venue but on a weight loss site it seems perfectly appropriate. Also, if you wanted help tweaking your program, how else could you get someone to help you if you didn't tell them what you were eating?

Rant here, bear with me. And way off the spirit of the thread, but I can't help myself, and I need to get this off my chest.

I think that twitter is totally offensive. Of course I also feel shame and guilt are 2 of the most useless emotions in the world. They do no good for anyone. Really, what does anyone get out of those emotions?

My Mother is the master of manipulating people with the guilt and shame emotions, and the whole subject sets me off.

Thankfully my sisters and I got our Dad's attitude about life. Don't get me wrong, I love my Mom, but she tries to guilt and shame us into what she wants us to do. She can't just call and ask.

I remember one time when in highshcool I did not make the honor roll,( I never did after this little episode, guess I had a point to prove or something) you would have thought the world was coming to an end. She gave me the big speech about "what am I going to tell my friends and family?" "I guess I've done a really bad job of raising you if you are so dumb you can't make the honor roll." "Do you know how that is going to make ME look and what my friends and our family are going to say about me?" "The honor rolls were published in this weeks paper and now I have to go to church on Sunday and face all those people who will wonder why YOU weren't on the honor roll, what am I supposed to say to them?" "I am so ashamed of you, I can't believe you would do this to me."

Not one time did she ever ask me, if I needed help, or what was the deal. I was just stupid and made her look bad.

This stuff haunts me to this day. I'm thankful for getting my Dad's attitude. Which confuses the heck out of my hubby. He has the "the whole world is against me, if all of you would just do what I want, my life would be great" attitude. When something goes wrong, I'm like, "well, let's figure out how to fix it, or ignore it or, deal with it, or what ever the case may be, and then get on with things.

I don't dwell on mistakes, or bad days, or what people think of me, I just don't care.

I figure tomorrow is another day, so I fell off the wagon and had a cheeseburger or a beer, or I didn't take out the trash of fold the laundry. Whoopee.

I can climb right back in the saddle tomorrow and give it my best shot.

No one is perfect.

Rant over.

Thanks for listening, it's what I love about everyone here!:D:hug:

:hug:
Shciref: I'm sorry you had to go through that, and I really understand why you feel the way you do about Twitter.
:hug:

Thanks.

Mom tried, but it seemed like she hinged her place on what her kids did.

She doesn't mean to be mean. She just doesn't know any other way.

Sis's and I now take it with a grain of salt and move on. Mostly. Once in a while it's still an issue. Then sis's and I call each other and figure it out, and move on.

Here's my take on it. Associating dieting/lifestyle changes with negativity is, for me, setting up for failure.

I lost 150 lbs 1999-2000/2003 to try to save my marriage. Didn't work. (Surprise, my weight wasn't the problem, LOL.) I was scared/angry/frustrated pretty much the whole time, and every single pound I lost wasn't celebrated, it was a grim step towards goal, which I never reached. When everything went up in smoke, I immediately gained it all back plus more. For me, dieting from a negative-attitudinal starting point was just setting myself up for failure.

What's different this time is, I'm doing this because I love myself and I'm worth it. I'm not losing weight for anyone or anything else other than ME. At first, when I was 370 lbs, the whole "I love me and I'm doing this for me" was fake. I didn't really feel it deep down. But, I faked it. And eventually (maybe around 299 lbs) I sort of started feeling it. It wasn't just empty words. And the farther I go, the truer it becomes.

In retrospect, I really did love myself at 370 lbs, just not how I looked/felt. And one of the clearest memories I have of the first day of this journey is, I remember telling myself, the beautiful woman you will be at 199 (or fewer) lbs would give you a giant hug right now if she could, and tell you how much she loves you and how much you deserve this. (Wow, I'm getting all choked up typing right now.) And that's so true. I haven't quite made it to 199 yet, but I look fantastic, I'm healthy, energetic and happy. And if I could go back in the past and hug 370 lb DCHound and tell her she'd get here 14 1/2 months later, I would.

So, for me, no. Shame-based dieting doesn't work. Love-based dieting does.

Posting what I ate in order to shame me into eating better would not work for me. I can't be shamed. I have no shame. I would be the girl posting that I washed a Snickers down with a 6 pack...ha!

But hey...we are all different and what works for one doesn't have to work for others. But I would never be anyone who would respond to someone's post and offer that shame to them whether they asked for it or not. Seems detrimental to me.

What a great post, DC. Trying gain motivation from shame and negativity doesn't work for me, either. All it does is make me feel more ashamed and negative!

There is a big difference between saying, "Hey, post a sample of your diet so we can help you tweak it, identify the problem areas, etc...." and "Post your diet so we can criticize it and make you feel bad about yourself." There is a very sad thread going right now where posters are telling stories of horrible, cruel things that others have said to them about their weight or what they are eating. I'm sure that in at least some of those instances, family members have thought that their cruel comments would help to motivate the overweight chick into losing weight. It rarely works that way; instead, it usually drives a person to feel WORSE and to retreat further into unhappiness.

It might work for some people, but it sure wouldn't work for me and I would be reluctant to ever try to make someone who is already feeling bad, feel worse. Tough love is one thing; shaming people is entirely another.

Windchime, thanks. I should clarify: shame-based dieting did work to the extent that, I lost plenty of weight that way. But, I wasn't able to sustain it because I had nothing to fall back on when my 'motivation' went away.

We talk a lot about motivation v. commitment here on 3FC. For me, shame was a great motivator. But motivation, and commitment, are two completely separate things. I know for certain that once the rest of this #$%! weight comes off, it ain't never coming back. Ever. And that's because I'm committed to losing weight, because I'm committed to ME. That's a very different outlook than being motivated by something--be it fear, shame or even love.