Again thank you so much everyone for your kind words! I think the main thing that brought this on was that I was having a self pity day (TOM coming :rolleyes:) and was frustrated with myself for letting it get so bad. For the longest time I kept myself at the 170 mark and I'm not really sure at what point I just gave up and gained up over 200. If I had just stayed at the 170 I would be done now and I think that's what was really bothering me.

Buuuuuuuuuut, I'm over it now. What's done is done and all I can do now is fix it. Also, in a way it's a good thing as I've learned sooo much about changing the way I eat and look at food and I think if I had stayed at 170 I probably wouldn't have put so much effort in and just tried to crash diet it away.
So overall it isn't that bad and it isn't anything I didn't do to myself.

SusanB - Thanks for those links, I'm going to start looking into weight lifting. I would love to have a nice lean look and I think weight lifting is the way to go.