So this past weekend I was hanging with some old friends and meeting some new ones and we started talking about music. One guy (one VERY cute and fit guy, I might add) started talking about his workout regime being coordinated with his music selection and the topic turned to working out. I wasn’t the only one there who was chunky, but I was the only person who was really overweight, and I didn’t mention anything at this point in the conversation. Then later I felt bad about it. I reasoned that I should be proud that I’m doing something to lose weight and shouldn’t feel silly or embarrassed talking about it.

So the next night I actually did mention something to an old friend (one who has lost about 90 pounds himself, mind you) and he looked at me funny and said “You’re working out? Really?” and I was all bubbly and said yeah and he looked at me disbelieving and mentioned something about not being able to tell it. OUCH!

Now, this guy was cool when he was overweight but now is an @$$ and later on mentioned how hot he was now and how much he thought about himself, and I decided to gauge people a little more before I share anything! He didn’t lose the weight on his own accord, it was actually drugs that did most of the work for him. But he later hit on me (as a last resort, I think) and I rejected him. Mostly because of his attitude, and the fact that I’m not that kinda girl, but I did get a sense of satisfaction from doing that!

But I was wondering if anyone else out there had problems mentioning their weight loss journey or working out and if there were instances that changed their minds. I know I will be proud of my life change, and definitely more proud when I’m showing results, but this burn taught me to be a little more cautious about which “friends” I share it with!

wow the nerve of some ppl. and yeah! you SHOULD be proud that you're taking control! screw what that guy thinks.

I mentioned only in passing to my roommates because I'm going to need more room in the fridge. I haven't told anyone else. I don't plan to. When the pounds start melting off, they'll realize what's goin on. And it really isn't about them anyway. It's about me.

Good for you for rejecting him... He sounds like a @$$! Then the piece of work has the audacity to hit on you? Was he drunk???

As far as your "friend", the worst kind of smoker is an ex-smoker. And to try to pick you up after acting like that is appalling. People like that make me wish you could put a bag over somebody's personality.

For me, it completely depends on who I am talking to. I have to know the person isn't going to say TEE HEE YOU'RE GONNA FAIL or start spouting theories like "if you poop in the morning it means you're gaining weight" or "if you eat after 6 pm it magically turns to fat". Barring lunatics like that though, I like talking about it - the more people there are who know, the more people there are expecting me to succeed - I refuse to disappoint people.

Wow, what a jerk! If it were me I'd decide it's time to move on from him, who needs friends like that?

If faced with a real fit and active person I'm not sure how I would react. I have been working out for some time now and I have lost weight but I'm still pretty pudgy and I think I'd feel funny talking about 'feeling the burn' with someone who actually looks like they've been working out. So I may have done the same thing you did with keeping quite.

Fortunately I'm a bit of a shut in (is that fortunate?) so I don't have a lot of people to tell outside of family. And like nooch, I've told them ALL! Diets before I was always afraid to tell people in case I failed leaving my a wide open backdoor but this time I want them all to know because I know I wont fail and have shut all the back doors.

I'm mostly a closed off type person and don't like letting a lot of people in on my life. There are two people at work who know I am trying to lose weight. They are the two that I trust the MOST with the delicate information. They are encouraging and happy for me, and we even go to aerobics classes together. But everyone else that I work with has no clue and I won't tell them either because I'm a bit over sensitive sometimes and if one of those people said something stupid, I'd probably punch them, lol. Oh, I did tell one other person at work. An older lady whom I thought could be mature with the information. The next day I worked with her she was just gushing with praise: "Look how much weight you've lost! Your britches are so loose on you! You are doing so well!" etc etc. Well it turns out that after I left, she told someone else that she couldn't even tell I was losing any weight! Crazy people. I've just learned to shrug it off and tell myself that pretty soon EVERYONE will notice.

LoL, no he was sober, just totally full of himself! He WAS my friend like 5 years ago and he has completely changed since then. Watta jerk! I really thought he would have been supportive, but I guess I was wrong!

And nooch, I agree, there should be a way to put a paper bag over someone's personality!

Right now mostly my family and super close friends know. It's always been private for me because it's something I want to do for me and no one else. I'm not exactly afraid of failing, because the way I see it is if I never quit, I never fail! But I am afraid of telling people and they jump to the conclusion that I'm doing it for a man or something else stupid like that. Or if they say something completely ridiculous like this joker did!

I also hate when I tell someone and they think that they are obligated to commend me on it and say something like “Good for you!” or “Way to go!” Gah! That’s almost as bad as “You can’t really tell!” I know they’re trying to be nice and supportive then, but really, I don’t need a kindergarten teacher response! So I've been keeping it to myself for the most part!

thats so obnoxious. people who used to be fat/drug addicts/smokers/etc are often the MOST judgmental and rude about others when they should really understand.

what a smug jackass. i hope you didnt let him bother you.

I know! He didn't even work to get the weight off, he was just addicted to meth! Of course, I didn't know that until after the insult... but still, that is way too judgmental for anyone, let alone a loser like that! But no, it didn't really bother me. He just made me think... At least jerks like that are good for something!

seriously. you shouldve said, "oh you cant tell im working out? well i can TOTALLY see the results of your meth diet!!!!"

sometimes i want to just ask people who raised them to think it was acceptable to say the things that they say.

I definitely feel that way not wanting to talk or bring up exercise or eating healthy since I don't look the part, but us chicks probably know more than most people!

Meth diet! that made me

I never talked about it when I was losing most of my weight. Occasionally I would have to schedule things around the gym, and I usually did indicate to my friends the reason, but it was just a matter-of-fact mention. Keep up what you are doing and soon it will be impossible for everyone NOT to notice!

Yeah, it is hard to tell people that I’m trying to live a healthy lifestyle and work out when I don’t look like it at all! After I’m all buff and stuff I’ll totally tell all the fit people that I live in a gym!

But seriously, it is good that we have this website to come to for advice and support. Us Chicks really do understand.