Does anyone else hate random insults?
 

So, yesterday I was browsing this store for a ball gown just in case my beau asks me to go with him to the Marine ball (He doesn't know yet whether or not he'll still be stationed here by then). The lady that worked there seemed really nice and was giving me different suggestions on styles, etc. Well, I find this beautiful dress and am about to go try it on when she crinkles her nose at me and says, "Oh no, honey. That's a dress for thin people. You don't want that one, it'll make any imperfections more obvious." Then, she stares at me for a few seconds with this thoughtful expression and says "of course, if you dropped about 20 pounds, it would look stunning on you. When's this event you're going to? Do you have time to lose weight? I know some great tips." She then proceeded to give me ridiculously stupid weight loss tips for about 5 minutes. I was so floored, I couldn't even think of anything to say. I just left the store. It ruined my whole day yesterday and I'm still kind of bleh. Why are people so randomly mean?

That is disgusting! How rude. I don't even know what to say. That's crappy though. It seems that people are mean when they feel their own insecurities. Maybe she was jealous of how hot you already are!?

Maybe it ruined your yesterday, but don't let it ruin your today! She's a miserable person!

At 139 pounds at 5'7", you're not even overweight. @@

umm does anyone LIKE random insults?!

some people are really obtuse and don't realize when they say awful things. and some people have no filter between brain and mouth. and some people are just rude! sorry you had such a discouraging encounter :(

When I was trying on wedding dresses, the consultant at David's said regarding three dresses in a row--"This dress would look stunning if you lose about 20-25 lbs.!" Finally, after the third, I said "could we talk about dresses that would look good on me now?!"

I complained to the manager, and she was quite genuinely shocked by her employee's behavior.

And 139 is not overweight for MY height, let alone yours. She must have a lot of supermodels in her life.

Good God, she's insane!

Seriously, just pity her that she can't see past her brainwashing. It's quite sad, really, that anyone buys into the heroin chic look.

Ugh, that's awful. You should call the store and complain to the manager.

If I were the manager I would want you to call.

sometimes people say things that are borderline and you could say that they mean well...this lady crossed the border....shes in the wrong business...theres always some insecurity when trying on clothes...she should have been totally positive and supportive, not insulting...but ya know what, thats her problem not yours

Don't let the jerks get you down. At your height 139 you would look great she is nuts. You really should have got her name so you could call and make a complaint to the manager

What the ****? I agree with Paris, She must be jealous or something, because I saw your other thread with your pictures and you're THIN!!
How insecure do you have to be to feel it's OK to say things like that to people..! Don't worry about it, she must be really reallly bored/miserable with life to say things like that to people, don't let it get to your head - it only makes HER look bad.

5'7"... 139 lbs.. and she says you need to LOSE 20??? What a total no-mind thing to say! You just encountered someone stupid. They are everywhere.. when you least expect it, they strike. Kind of like a snake with jello for brains. :dizzy:

You need to laugh at this. It's in the "Stupid People 101" manual. ;)

If it were me, I might have said, "Are you for real? Give me that dress so I can try it on. Is there anyone else here today that can assist me?" I would say it rather loudly to make sure everyone else heard as well. She might not have engaged her brain before she spoke, but she would think twice about saying something so stupid again. And I know, it's much easier to think of what you maybe should have said after the fact. I do it all the time!

Chin up - you are gorgeous & HOT just the way you are! :hug:

Mean people stink! I agree with calling the manager. She possibly lost the store a sale.

Recently I had a guy at work ask me why I was "letting myself get big". He is a scrawny little nobody, and yet it ruined my day, too. I guess we need to think up the perfect comeback for moments like this.

I hate jerks who comment on other people's weight. I'm sorry you had to deal with this idiot, cammieb. I think I would have stuttered something like "Excuse me?" in response because I would've been too stunned to say anything else. I really think you should call the store and complain. Even if you don't know the name of the salesperson, give them the time you were in the store and a description of the person. They will be able to figure out who was working there with that info. Hopefully, they'll fire her or put her on serious probation. For reals? Telling someone (anyone actually) that they're too FAT for a dress? Shouldn't the customer just figure that out on their own? Well, I guess we know what she has for brains...

Originally Posted by cammieb:
So, yesterday I was browsing this store for a ball gown just in case my beau asks me to go with him to the Marine ball (He doesn't know yet whether or not he'll still be stationed here by then). The lady that worked there seemed really nice and was giving me different suggestions on styles, etc. Well, I find this beautiful dress and am about to go try it on when she crinkles her nose at me and says, "Oh no, honey. That's a dress for thin people. You don't want that one, it'll make any imperfections more obvious." Then, she stares at me for a few seconds with this thoughtful expression and says "of course, if you dropped about 20 pounds, it would look stunning on you. When's this event you're going to? Do you have time to lose weight? I know some great tips." She then proceeded to give me ridiculously stupid weight loss tips for about 5 minutes. I was so floored, I couldn't even think of anything to say. I just left the store. It ruined my whole day yesterday and I'm still kind of bleh. Why are people so randomly mean?

That was really uncalled for, but it could have been a cultural difference. In some cultures, people aren't offended or upset when they hear something like that and people are more free to express those kinds of opinions.

Just don't shop there again and if you really want, complain to her manager (that is, if she isn't the manager).

That's actually happened where I work but not at my store. At other stores in New York or on the East Coast, a lot of brides complained that their wedding consultants said stuff like that to them.

Originally Posted by Eumie:
When I was trying on wedding dresses, the consultant at David's said regarding three dresses in a row--"This dress would look stunning if you lose about 20-25 lbs.!" Finally, after the third, I said "could we talk about dresses that would look good on me now?!"

I complained to the manager, and she was quite genuinely shocked by her employee's behavior.

And 139 is not overweight for MY height, let alone yours. She must have a lot of supermodels in her life.

Oh my Lord I just commented on this before I read your post.

I work at a David's Bridal in California and we have monthly meetings where we go over customer feedback from both our store and from others... and at other stores, that's what brides have said about their consultants, that they say that they'd look better in a certain gown if they lost 30 lbs, and so on, and everyone at my store was pretty horrified. Thank you for complaining to the manager. that's just unacceptable behavior.

Anyways, like i said above, it could have been a cultural difference.

I agree with the others...I think she was jealous. I saw your pics...there's no WAY someone could say you need to lose 20lbs. Unless, she was looking at you through funhouse mirror glasses.

I understand what you mean, though. I want to lose weight so I can't be called fat again. Of course, being a woman, even if I was 90lbs, someone would call me fat at some point. People are silly.

You should go Pretty Woman on her, though. Go buy a stunning dress somewhere else, get your guy dressed up, then go in her store and say, "Remember me? You wouldn't sell that dres to me? BIG mistake." And walk out!

:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug: I'm so sorry! You've already made so much progress.. don't let ignorant people like that woman put you down. Keep your head up!

OMG how terrible! Seriously at 139 you ARE at a perfect weight IMO.

I'd kill to be 139 really I would! Man if she had said that I would have been like "are you saying I'm fat?" Then thrown the dress down and demand to speak to a manager lol. Maybe you could have gotten 20% off ;)

that's really tacky of a sales person, usually they try to push sales on you whether they think stuff looks good on your or not. man... I would of told her she lost her commission and I'd be taking my money elsewhere... then I would of went home to cry. :(

and at 139lbs you aren't even fat, can't believe she told you to lose 20lbs, you don't need to look like a stick.

People say stupid stuff I wouldn't worry about it too much. When I was in college and before I had a baby (lol) my normal weight was 100lbs. I was wearing a midriff and jeans while out shopping and the sales associate goes, "Oh cute! You're pregnant!" At the time I was pissed off, but in hindsight, what an idiot! There is no possible way I could have looked over weight, bloated or whatever...who knows why he thought or said that. Same in your circumstance who knows why she said what she did, but it doesn't make it "so."

By they by, I would DEFINITELY call the manager. What if she said something like that to somebody who had an eating disorder or something? That could really traumatize people not to be dramatic. If she is the manager I'd ask for the General Manager or the owner.

That was so uncalled for and I am sorry it happened to you. Don't let stupidity get you down :hug::hug:

Thanks you guys. You really made me feel better. Now that I think about it, it was a pretty stupid thingto get so worked up over, especially since she wasn't exactly thin herself, but you know how it is when you're still insecure with your body. I did get her name (she was wearing a name tag) and I think I may complain, just so she doesn't say this kind of thing to more people. Stupid people shouldn't work in customer service, in my opinion. Anyways, thanks a bunch, guys. (((hugs)))

At the time, this was egregious enough that I would have pulled out my showstopper "wow, you're rude!" line...specifically, I'd have turned to her and said "What a terribly inappropriate thing to say. How embarrassing for you".

Then I would have followed it with "I would like you to get me your manager, please, so I can find someone else to help me". And then I would have told the manager what happened.

The question isn't whether you "deserved" it or not given your VERY NORMAL AND HEALTHY weight and height. It would have been just as inappropriate if you were 300 lbs - it just isn't how you talk to customers. And her manager needs to be aware.

Wow I just look at your pic post. I think you looked great at 170. At 139 you look great and curvy. I think some people confuse a real woman's shape with being fat. She definitely was jealous!