I just reread your post and I am seeing this final question, which I wanted to address.

I am sticking to it because I DECIDED to. That may sound a bit simplified, but that is the bottom line. I decided to lose the weight and I was/am WILLING to do what it takes. Upon making the decision to lose the weight, I then made the commitment to do whatever it takes and never go back. I overhauled my life. I re-invented myself so to speak. Because I decided to and I was willing to. And it's the best darn decision I've ever made.

Great Thread Ladies!!

This is really what I need lately- I feel so blah about it all.... I have been half-*ssing my counting of points though I have kept up in my exercise- I have still been losing but small amounts- which I know are a direct cause to my poor tracking and choices- (chinese!) Ugh-

I have been looking for something inspirational and I must say this is a great thread to read when looking for something more to push in the right direction!

Lori Bell- OMG!! You Rock!! Your stats are absolutely amazing! Your are such an inspiration- Have you posted any before and after pics recently? I would love to check them out if you have!

Kiramira...Awesome post. I especially loved what you said about the time spent analyzing why you were fat...I did that too...knowing there were not obvious health reasons I was overweight should have been my only concern. It is so sad to think of how much time I spent just trying to figure out why I was fat....well duh, because I ate like a Nebraska Cornhusker defencive tackle...without daily practice, that's why....period.

akacutie...thanks for the kudos. I plan on posting some current before and after pictures when I make it to my goal...when I figure out what that is.

God what a horrible day it was when I realized that at 244lbs I was linebacker size...and even worse when I saw a Discovery Channel program on the Silverback Gorilla and realized that the shape and form of my shoulders, back and bum looked JUST LIKE THAT of a walking dominant MALE gorilla from behind (without all the hair, of course hahahaha!)...
keep up the AWESOME work, Ms Lori Bell!!! You are truly inspiring!

Kira

OMG, I felt the SAME EXACT way. It's amazing that some of us have so many similiarities, even down to thoughts like this.

I remember thinking that I weigh more then NFL linebackers. Only they're men and I'm a woman. And they're ummmm, a bit taller then 5 foot nothing. Heck I weighed more then NBA players and they're almost 7 feet tall. It boggled my mind at one point, how I could let myself get so heavy. But I too had had enough of trying to figure out the how's and the whys. It was time. It was time to to just "do".

I stick with it because I love what my body can do now. I love outdoor activities, and would be outside EVERY day hiking, biking, running, kayaking .... if I could (pesky job). When I was heavier, not only were these activities much more difficult, I started being afraid to try to do things because I didn't believe I could any more. I felt - old.

Now I can do ANYTHING! I can do 15 mile day hikes to the mountain top and back, I can kayak 10 miles with ease, I can run half marathons. I'm in the best shape of my life and I am NOT old!! Weight loss for me was never about appearance, although that's a nice ancillary benefit. It was always about health and fitness and being able to DO the things I love, for as long as I can possibly manage. Yes I have to watch what I eat, work out religiously, monitor my weight - forever. But to feel the way I do now is worth everything.

I turn 50 this fall. I'm looking forward to it because I graduate to a new age group for running events, and I have a better chance of winning medals!!

Your whole post was good, but I wanted to quote this part again because it's so true. For me, the refusal to participate in self-loathing has been key. KEY. I still sometimes get down, but then I just continue on. Because what's my alternative? Give up and eat whatever, whenever I want? Isn't that what got me up to 245 pounds and feeling sick and old all the time? No, thanks!

I had a weekend that some might consider bad. I was over on calories both days, one day significantly so. But that day is gone now, in the past, never to be seen again. And I refuse to tell myself that I'm horrible, lazy, weak, or disgusting simply because I had a chicken enchilada and a beer. Sunday afternoon it was right back on plan, keep moving forward. Because eventually I'll get there.

Like you, I also have removed time limitations from my weight-loss goals. Oh sure, in the back of my mind I know that my 1.3 pounds per week average means that I could be pretty hot by Christmas but if I'm NOT hot by Christmas, then I'll be hot next spring. In the scheme of things, it doesn't matter if I reach my goal in 12 months versus 15 months.

MBN, hats off to you! Not many people your age are willing to make those sacrifices and changes, as they think the window of opportunity has passed them by.

I, too, was afraid to try. I seriously thought I would be 30-40 lbs overweight for the rest of my life. My blood pressure was high, then it started running very, very low. Considering I did not EVER take in any physical activity should have been a clue. Hypo, by definition will slow you down. So I thought maybe, just maybe if ****I**** take the initiative and do what is in my power to speed up the metabolism, maybe my HR, BP and weight will fall into place. I read, and read and read some more. So I decided to quit reading, quit dwelling on OTHER people and their situations, and the horror stories, quit listening to my doctor even, who told me weight loss would be close to impossible. And just look at any message board concerning hypothyroidism: the prognosis for weight loss is bleak at best!

Seriously, I was like the little boy from "The Secret Garden" so frail to do this or that for fear that it would worsen my condition. It was time for the wallowing in self-pity to stop. I am only 34!

My husband said last night that over the past three weeks that sure, he has noticed the weight loss but even more, he has noticed my determination, my confidence and he says I am just "glowing". He is starting to see the inner strength I had when we met 16 years ago.

I am no longer laying here playing dead due to some disease that may or may not be hindering my progress. I am just chugging along, doing what has been scientfically proven to work (calories in/calories out with lots of exercise and healthy food choices) and it IS working.

With hypothyroidism, there are only and handful of role models who have beat the odds of maintaining healthy weight. Jillian Michaels and Karolina Kurkova (Victoria Secrets model) are a couple that stand out in my mind. I am sure there are normal, everyday people that I don't know of. If they can beat this illness, so can I. Once I changed my mindset on this illness and got moving, I swear I don't come close to HALF as fatigued and achey.

Yahhh, Windchime! Removing self-loathing from the equation is so FREEING!!
Keep on chugging along!!!!
Kira

I'm not where I need to be yet (not close) but I have now lost more weight than I've ever lost before. I did not feel ANY motivation when I started. I just started eating better. I've always waited for the EMOTION called motivation to get me going before. But it's an emotion- fickle and fleeting.

When I *started* this time the goal was to do everything the opposite of how I'd done it before. I would school myself to accept SMALL changes with the hope that they'd add up to weight loss over time. Even if they didn't, at least I'd be healthier. I didn't start exercising for 4 months. It's the food that's my downfall and I wanted to learn how to focus on that.

I break everything down to 12 week 'sessions' and don't look too much at the bigger goal beyond that. I just focus on getting to the end of the session- committing for just that amount of time only. I'm now on my 4th session. Yes, my weight is coming off SLLOOOOWWW. That's totally okay. It's trying to 'get the weight off as quickly as possible' that has caused me and many others to fail countless times in the past. By disciplining myself to accept a less than perfect effort I'm getting closer to achieving my goals than I ever did by trying to lose weight perfectly. Funny how that works.

You all are amazing! I so appreciate hearing your thoughts. The ideas that particularly stand out to me are around:
1) Stopping self-loathing when you make a mistake or get off plan
2) Making gradual changes
3) Not holding yourself to a set schedule/timeframe for weight loss
I think I have often made the typical mistakes of expecting it all to come off a heck of a lot quicker than it went on, making overly drastic changes that few could stick with (exercising 3 hrs/day, etc.), and giving up totally and eating the whole bag of Doritos if I got off plan at all or didn't see the scale move the way I expected.

I love hearing about how great you all feel now that you're on your way. That saying that 'nothing tastes as good as looking good feels' seems to sum it up.

You guys are the best!

MBN - what a role model you are! I can't wait to be able to run faster and longer as I get lighter and fitter.

Bindersbee - love the 12-week idea - that seems easier to tackle than everything at once

Windchime - I'm going to try to follow your no self-loathing example : )

Niecy - you rock - way to go!

Rockinrobin - like the just do it - don't worry about why approach...

Kiramira - the gorilla image just cracked me up : ) And I liked your idea about forgiving yourself when you goof.

Loribell - what an accomplishment - I'm so impressed by your progress!

Vermontmom - love the emphasis on the long and healthy life - great priorities

Glory - no such thing as TMI : ) Thanks for the encouraging thoughts from an expert!!

jajabee - what's a GWF armband? Does it monitor heartrate and calories? Sounds like you've found what works for you - congrats!

chickiegirl - totally agree on the not wanting to be 'bogged down' by weight

Thighsbegone - like the emphasis on accountability and community

I like what you said rockinrobin especially this one:

I keep going because I despised being overweight. HATED it. It kept me from doing so much. I was a miserable, underutilized, anxiety ridden, depressed, inactive, mope-y person, leading a very sedentary and unproductive life. I had had enough of it.