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-   -   How do you tactfully tell a family member they should lose weight?? (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/weight-loss-support/172772-how-do-you-tactfully-tell-family-member-they-should-lose-weight.html)

srmb60 05-29-2009 05:27 AM

In Response to JayElll .... hi Jay!

I find that if I meet someone who is interested in weight loss or healthy eating or fitness ... we have something in common and sort of cozy up. I don't think it has anything to do with the outcome. It's more about having something in common.

JayEll 05-29-2009 06:31 AM

MariaMaria--I don't think she did, because I didn't follow SugarBusters and I told her so.

Hi SusanB! :wave: :)

Jay

StringBean 05-29-2009 12:51 PM

Thank you everyone for your help and suggestions. After reading all your thoughts, I think I will say nothing to my sister for now and just be there for her when/if she asks for my help or advice. I love her and I wouldn't want anything at all to ruin the bond we have. Whenever we're together she really enjoys going out and exercising with me and we have such a laugh together, so I think I won't do anything different. I think I may also tell my parents to be a little less blunt with her, because obviously it is not helping. Thank you all again for replying.

x0me880x 05-29-2009 01:02 PM

She knows that she is fat, and she knows that she needs to lose weight. Having someone tell her, is only going to make her worse. Chances are she has tried in the past, and for whatever reason thinks she "failed" at it. No one can make a person lose weight, as well as no one can make a person WANT to. That person has to discover it on there own, and has to want it for themself, and no one but themself. She has to realize that on her own, or it will never work.

I would be so angry (and it has happened), if someone came up to me and was like "Im worried about you lose weight". Even trying to say it "politely", I've been there, done that, and it's not fun. It just brings on so much anger at that person.

PinkVS 05-29-2009 07:33 PM

Can you tell her you need a rollerblading buddy?Even if you half to buy her rollerblades...I have been thinking about buying rollerblades lately thought it might be something you to could enjoy together

healthfreak 05-29-2009 10:12 PM

How to Suggest
 
It's a very tricky subject but can be achieved maybe through your own successful example without blowing your own horn in her face any more.

I would suggest first doing a great job at losing weight, wearing all the wonderful clothes you love to wear, and always showing that you are happy and content with your current weight. Show it, don't tell it--is a great way to motivate and inspire others to follow your lead. You want to inspire, not discourage your sister from losing weight.

kelly315 05-31-2009 03:39 PM

stringbean- I think your sister probably already knows she has a weight problem. To be honest, if someone your size told me that I need to lose weight, I would be very offended, family or not, and angry. I'm not sure there is a way you can tell her to lose weight without it being offensive, because you are so much smaller than her, it will always come off as condescending.

I think you should trust your sister to fix her own life. Most weight gain is a symptom of a larger problem, so maybe she needs time to deal with what that problem is.

Sophia Elise 05-31-2009 06:16 PM

It's a good thing all the members in my family are healthy. Truly, health is wealth.

Tiffany529 05-31-2009 06:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LandonsBaby (Post 2760071)
She's 23 years old, she's an adult. She knows she's fat. When she's ready to do something about it she will figure it out. When she's ready, help her out but until they it really is none of your business. Just be a good example.

Totally agree with above! Just like you had your lightbulb moment she will have hers and want to lose weight.

lifechange 05-31-2009 07:59 PM

One question: Do you think she doesn't know? This is only something she can do for herself when she is completely ready and committed


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